I am trying to be positive....
but i want to take down every decoration down now..........
and today was not the day i thought it was going to be..................
but thats life..............
and i just want to say Merry Christmas to you all...................
and God Bless you all......................
STEPHY.......if you read this.....i love u and i miss you..........
thumper
Thumper, I am so sorry that you are feeling down. I pray that you start to feel a bit more festive soon.
I am finally kicked back watching A Christmas Story for the umpteenth time. I still have dishes to do, but everything is put up. I am making sure that I take some "ME" time, I've worked so hard and it would be a shame not to enjoy it.
Know sweetheart that I love you and I greatly value our friendship.
God Bless You and Yours!
I am finally kicked back watching A Christmas Story for the umpteenth time. I still have dishes to do, but everything is put up. I am making sure that I take some "ME" time, I've worked so hard and it would be a shame not to enjoy it.
Know sweetheart that I love you and I greatly value our friendship.
God Bless You and Yours!
thank you janet........................
i love you to...
helps to have a freind to reach out to and they understand with out saying a whole lot...........
thumoer
i love you to...
helps to have a freind to reach out to and they understand with out saying a whole lot...........
thumoer
Thumper,
I am very sorry today did not turn out right-- I know that can be heart breaking. Im not at all trying to be nosy or intrusive- just to share what may in some ways be a common experience. Of course I am basing your sadness on a holiday hunch or guess
& my guess is that loved ones werent as receptive as they could have been--& u were so looking to share ur joy & good spirit with them only to be let down & even rejected. Growing up and till the past few years holidays were either painfull, confusing or meaningless to me. This had nothing whatsoever to do with drugs.
In my first marriage major Christian holidays were definitely painfull because my wife suffered rejection from her parents & she was one of the few of the 13 children that actually wanted to see her parents Christmas or Easter. She was the only one (i should say we) not invited over. Sometimes we would bring our 2 little girls and kind of impose a visit on them whethter they liked it or not. But we were never invited for dinner, or even offered a glass of soda. The reason for this 'LOVING TREATMENT' from her parents was that she was married to me.
Oh, I was a fine man allright. But there was a big major problem with me. Not only was I not Catholic, their daughter had gone and married a Jew. Now how dare me respect my wife and her desire to celebrate Christmas. Their exact words were "He has his own holidays."
Well, every year, that pain was with her & us. Even though her parents supposedly didnt believe in divorce, when we were starting to have serious problems & then decided to maybe work things our, her mother continuously harped to her on divorce being the right thing.
Briefly, GROWING UP, HOLIDAYS WERE ALMOST ALWAYS PAINFUL FOR ME. i NEVER KNEW WHAT TO EXPECT from my parents- mostly my mother. It could be that my mother was in a mood, which ment she went on tyrades for at least 3 days, laying on the couch, covered with some kind of fake or real mink stole (sp) & wearing sunglasses & yealling & yelling & yelling.
Or there could be nothing, or there could be a sort of celebration of sourts that no one felt like partaking in. Growing up, it was much more confusing then i am making it sound. Holidays came to mean just aabout nothing to me, until---
My current wife of about 10 years always loved the family time of holidays & I now love it to. But even so, though I felt we had a good Christmas, there is also a background of a great sadness for us, FOR SOMEONE IS MISSING FROM OUR LIVES.
Our 20 year old daughter (actually my stepdaughter, but I have raised her since she was less then 2) has really broke my wives heart & treated us both terribly. I dont want to get into the whole thing, but about a month in a half ago, she more or less 'RAN AWAY FROM HOME.'
Yes she is 20 & yes she could have moved out anytime if she wantd to with our support & blessing. It s so odd- suddenly we (& i think her mother especially) are these bad , bad people. It is so bizarre because she really has fabricated reality for no valid reason. And it gets worse, but again, i dont need to talk about that now.
A few nights later, while my wife was working, she & her boyfriend broke in the house at 3 am. I woke up. When i told her she was welcome to her stuff, but not at 3 in the am when her mom wasnt home. I told her to come back in the day. Her personality switched, she got angry toward me in a way i had never seen. My 14 year old son pointed out the obvious to me which i had not seen. Her eyes were bulging, she was hostile, etc, etc. She was probably on drugs.
ANYWAY, THIS CHRISTMAS, THEIR IS AN UNDERCURRRENT OF SADNESS, DEEP SADNESS. bUT I DO ALSO FEEL JOY, for myself, my son, my wife, my other children & our animals, and the new lease on life God has started to give me.
I also remember & have seen the fact that as time goes on, things do change, many times in real good ways.]] GOD BLESS
I am very sorry today did not turn out right-- I know that can be heart breaking. Im not at all trying to be nosy or intrusive- just to share what may in some ways be a common experience. Of course I am basing your sadness on a holiday hunch or guess
& my guess is that loved ones werent as receptive as they could have been--& u were so looking to share ur joy & good spirit with them only to be let down & even rejected. Growing up and till the past few years holidays were either painfull, confusing or meaningless to me. This had nothing whatsoever to do with drugs.
In my first marriage major Christian holidays were definitely painfull because my wife suffered rejection from her parents & she was one of the few of the 13 children that actually wanted to see her parents Christmas or Easter. She was the only one (i should say we) not invited over. Sometimes we would bring our 2 little girls and kind of impose a visit on them whethter they liked it or not. But we were never invited for dinner, or even offered a glass of soda. The reason for this 'LOVING TREATMENT' from her parents was that she was married to me.
Oh, I was a fine man allright. But there was a big major problem with me. Not only was I not Catholic, their daughter had gone and married a Jew. Now how dare me respect my wife and her desire to celebrate Christmas. Their exact words were "He has his own holidays."
Well, every year, that pain was with her & us. Even though her parents supposedly didnt believe in divorce, when we were starting to have serious problems & then decided to maybe work things our, her mother continuously harped to her on divorce being the right thing.
Briefly, GROWING UP, HOLIDAYS WERE ALMOST ALWAYS PAINFUL FOR ME. i NEVER KNEW WHAT TO EXPECT from my parents- mostly my mother. It could be that my mother was in a mood, which ment she went on tyrades for at least 3 days, laying on the couch, covered with some kind of fake or real mink stole (sp) & wearing sunglasses & yealling & yelling & yelling.
Or there could be nothing, or there could be a sort of celebration of sourts that no one felt like partaking in. Growing up, it was much more confusing then i am making it sound. Holidays came to mean just aabout nothing to me, until---
My current wife of about 10 years always loved the family time of holidays & I now love it to. But even so, though I felt we had a good Christmas, there is also a background of a great sadness for us, FOR SOMEONE IS MISSING FROM OUR LIVES.
Our 20 year old daughter (actually my stepdaughter, but I have raised her since she was less then 2) has really broke my wives heart & treated us both terribly. I dont want to get into the whole thing, but about a month in a half ago, she more or less 'RAN AWAY FROM HOME.'
Yes she is 20 & yes she could have moved out anytime if she wantd to with our support & blessing. It s so odd- suddenly we (& i think her mother especially) are these bad , bad people. It is so bizarre because she really has fabricated reality for no valid reason. And it gets worse, but again, i dont need to talk about that now.
A few nights later, while my wife was working, she & her boyfriend broke in the house at 3 am. I woke up. When i told her she was welcome to her stuff, but not at 3 in the am when her mom wasnt home. I told her to come back in the day. Her personality switched, she got angry toward me in a way i had never seen. My 14 year old son pointed out the obvious to me which i had not seen. Her eyes were bulging, she was hostile, etc, etc. She was probably on drugs.
ANYWAY, THIS CHRISTMAS, THEIR IS AN UNDERCURRRENT OF SADNESS, DEEP SADNESS. bUT I DO ALSO FEEL JOY, for myself, my son, my wife, my other children & our animals, and the new lease on life God has started to give me.
I also remember & have seen the fact that as time goes on, things do change, many times in real good ways.]] GOD BLESS
brown dog....................
your right...............
i bought a gift for my dad and a beautiful card and he did not want it...............
i recieve emails for Joel Osteen everyday and look at the email that
i recieved on Christmas Eve........THE DAY I DELIVERED THE GIFT...
HERE IS THE EMAL....
heres the link so you can see exackly what i got in my email....
Email THUMPER recieved the day Thumper delivered the gift...
GOD WAS PREPARING ME FOR REJECTION.
do you see now why i love God so much....
God does stuff like this all the time to let me know he is here and watching...
**start email**
Everlasting Father
Today's Scripture
For to us a Child is born, to us a Son is given; and the government shall be upon His shoulder, and His name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father [of Eternity], Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6 AMP).
Today's Word from Joel and Victoria
When you accept Jesus as your Lord and Savior, you become a child of the Most High God. You instantly have an Everlasting Father! Think about that word everlasting. That means that before the beginning of time, the Father was there. He was waiting for you to accept Him and become a child of His. And I can only imagine that He was excited and anticipating that day, just like a father would anticipate the birth of his child in the natural. I can imagine He would think everyday, Is it today? I dont know what your experience has been with your earthly father, but God is a good and perfect Father. He loves you with an everlasting love. He loves everything about you so much that He notices when a single hair falls from your head. He accepts you just the way you are, and He loves you enough to guide you and work His character in you. And, He will be your Father from now until eternity! He will never leave you nor forsake you! Thank Him today for being your Everlasting Father!
A Prayer for Today
Everlasting Father, thank You for loving me today and for always being with me. Help me to understand Your love more so that I may know You better. Let Your love flow through me so that others may see Your goodness and come to know You as their Father also. I bless You today. In Jesus Name. Amen.
**end of email**
browndog....justin...right?
your story has got tears in my eyes and how nice of you to let your spirit get sesitive to pick up on what the hurt was in my heart..............
i just spoke to my mom and my dad has cut me off 100%
so now my mom and i are going out and i am bringing my dog...
she is 7lbs...i am gonna put her coat on and bundel her up in blankets and were going for a long drive...............
my husband and i on top of all this had an argument because he opened all his gifts and could not wait for me so we could do it as a family my husband and I.
when i get home today....i am taking down ALL my decorations,,,,
and next month my mom and i are going to FL and staying at a beautiful hotel on the ocean...
i love my mom more than anything in this world....
and my little dog.....
so i am going to go and take a shower and wash all the tears away and then do my hair and makeup and go out with moms and have a wonderful day.......
thank you so much janet and Brown dog.....................
i love you for reaching out to me..........
becuase ususally no one here does........................
thank you................
thumper
your right...............
i bought a gift for my dad and a beautiful card and he did not want it...............
i recieve emails for Joel Osteen everyday and look at the email that
i recieved on Christmas Eve........THE DAY I DELIVERED THE GIFT...
HERE IS THE EMAL....
heres the link so you can see exackly what i got in my email....
Email THUMPER recieved the day Thumper delivered the gift...
GOD WAS PREPARING ME FOR REJECTION.
do you see now why i love God so much....
God does stuff like this all the time to let me know he is here and watching...
**start email**
Everlasting Father
Today's Scripture
For to us a Child is born, to us a Son is given; and the government shall be upon His shoulder, and His name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father [of Eternity], Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6 AMP).
Today's Word from Joel and Victoria
When you accept Jesus as your Lord and Savior, you become a child of the Most High God. You instantly have an Everlasting Father! Think about that word everlasting. That means that before the beginning of time, the Father was there. He was waiting for you to accept Him and become a child of His. And I can only imagine that He was excited and anticipating that day, just like a father would anticipate the birth of his child in the natural. I can imagine He would think everyday, Is it today? I dont know what your experience has been with your earthly father, but God is a good and perfect Father. He loves you with an everlasting love. He loves everything about you so much that He notices when a single hair falls from your head. He accepts you just the way you are, and He loves you enough to guide you and work His character in you. And, He will be your Father from now until eternity! He will never leave you nor forsake you! Thank Him today for being your Everlasting Father!
A Prayer for Today
Everlasting Father, thank You for loving me today and for always being with me. Help me to understand Your love more so that I may know You better. Let Your love flow through me so that others may see Your goodness and come to know You as their Father also. I bless You today. In Jesus Name. Amen.
**end of email**
browndog....justin...right?
your story has got tears in my eyes and how nice of you to let your spirit get sesitive to pick up on what the hurt was in my heart..............
i just spoke to my mom and my dad has cut me off 100%
so now my mom and i are going out and i am bringing my dog...
she is 7lbs...i am gonna put her coat on and bundel her up in blankets and were going for a long drive...............
my husband and i on top of all this had an argument because he opened all his gifts and could not wait for me so we could do it as a family my husband and I.
when i get home today....i am taking down ALL my decorations,,,,
and next month my mom and i are going to FL and staying at a beautiful hotel on the ocean...
i love my mom more than anything in this world....
and my little dog.....
so i am going to go and take a shower and wash all the tears away and then do my hair and makeup and go out with moms and have a wonderful day.......
thank you so much janet and Brown dog.....................
i love you for reaching out to me..........
becuase ususally no one here does........................
thank you................
thumper
Thumper im glad ur feeling a little better but why didnt ur dad want it. U have really got me curious on this----it seems bizarre
No thumper Reddog is Justin. this is a different person.
I am sorry you are going through such bad times. Have you thought about talking to a counselor about all this for support?
I am sorry you are going through such bad times. Have you thought about talking to a counselor about all this for support?
Brooke, now u got me all kindsa confused: THIS POST IS FROM THUMPER LOVE---LOOK A COUPLE BACK.
Thanks so much for ur concern Brooke, but I'm pretty OK. I was just explaining the depth of our pain (mostly my wives) to just kind of let ThumperLove know that she is not alone in her struggle.
Im about as good as i get---It would be fantastic to find a good therapist who could help me. I had been working with this shrink & he was real helpful plus I thought he was a good guy & I trusted him & talk about stupid bizzare things, well what happened with us (me & the shrink) & not seeing him is as stupid as it gets, BUT, i gotta get goin now. If anyone is curious, remind me. it was pure stupid. Id love totell someone & get their take, especially if is someone who ever worked in a drs office
Thanks so much for ur concern Brooke, but I'm pretty OK. I was just explaining the depth of our pain (mostly my wives) to just kind of let ThumperLove know that she is not alone in her struggle.
Im about as good as i get---It would be fantastic to find a good therapist who could help me. I had been working with this shrink & he was real helpful plus I thought he was a good guy & I trusted him & talk about stupid bizzare things, well what happened with us (me & the shrink) & not seeing him is as stupid as it gets, BUT, i gotta get goin now. If anyone is curious, remind me. it was pure stupid. Id love totell someone & get their take, especially if is someone who ever worked in a drs office
no need for a couselor............
this has been going on for years...............
long story but my father can be pretty hateful.............
i have taken all suggestions and put them into action..........
so its time to accept this relationship and i am ok with it..........
mom and i are so frickin tight and i take good care of my mom and i always am there for my dad if he needs me since i am a nurse............
my mom is my best buddie, i love to travel with my mom and i love shopping and just sitting with her for hours, she has to kick me out and tell me to go home...cause i ;ll pick time with my mom over sleep...........lol
and tonight new years eve.......i picked up my mom and kidnapped her....
had a co worker and her husband over and my husband was here and we had a wonderful time...then i took my mom home and dropped her off....after d*** clark dropped the BALL......YEAH!!! 2008...........
the snow is terrible here......
it normally takes me 10 minutes to get to my moms and and it took me 2 hours to drop her off and get home........
i had to drive like 25mph..........
so somtimes its nice to get things off ur heart.........
and just shoot the breeze............
and thank God that I was given friends that are so supportive ....
and thats all i need and i just get on with things and tomorrow is a new day...
HAppy New year...............
2008 ..............
hip hip horrayyyyyyyyyyy.........................
love
thumper
this has been going on for years...............
long story but my father can be pretty hateful.............
i have taken all suggestions and put them into action..........
so its time to accept this relationship and i am ok with it..........
mom and i are so frickin tight and i take good care of my mom and i always am there for my dad if he needs me since i am a nurse............
my mom is my best buddie, i love to travel with my mom and i love shopping and just sitting with her for hours, she has to kick me out and tell me to go home...cause i ;ll pick time with my mom over sleep...........lol
and tonight new years eve.......i picked up my mom and kidnapped her....
had a co worker and her husband over and my husband was here and we had a wonderful time...then i took my mom home and dropped her off....after d*** clark dropped the BALL......YEAH!!! 2008...........
the snow is terrible here......
it normally takes me 10 minutes to get to my moms and and it took me 2 hours to drop her off and get home........
i had to drive like 25mph..........
so somtimes its nice to get things off ur heart.........
and just shoot the breeze............
and thank God that I was given friends that are so supportive ....
and thats all i need and i just get on with things and tomorrow is a new day...
HAppy New year...............
2008 ..............
hip hip horrayyyyyyyyyyy.........................
love
thumper