Well, I'm trying again and I've got one day sober. It's amazing how good I feel today, just one day after not having a drink or any other drug. I am hopeful and have decided to go back to a meeting. I went once and told myself I wasn't really an alcoholic. DENIAL-I've been drinking like a fish ever since. SO........here I go again. Reading all these posts has helped me get back on track and try again. Thanks!!
hi otis, good for you, we all start with one day, glad to see you posting!!
take care
carol
take care
carol
Otis-I too, had the heavy burden of denial hanging over me for 28 years and actually was intro'd into the 12 step program when I was 23. I idenftifed with mostly everyone in the room, and knew in my hearts of hearts I was an alcoholic. However, over twenty years later I finally was really to get out the denial and surrender. I was willing to go to any length to get sober...if they told me to pick up cigarette butts in the parking lot of our local Alano Club I would do it...nothing comes before my sobriety today - beause if I don't have my sobriety I have nothing. Off to work now, it's extremely beautiful here in sunny SoCal this morning. I am overflowing with gratitude this morning and life is good - remember if you are sick and tired, of being sick and tired you NEVER have to feel that way again! Take care, VWGirl PS-Way to go, 1 day is a BIG deal!
VW Girl,
Thanks for replying. It feels so good to have people care and respond that don't even know me. I now have 2 days in, the most I have ever had so far is 14 days. I can't believe that at 40 years old I have finally realized that I am an alcoholic. Once I started to think about it, it was so obvious but I always thought I was OK, that it was normal to drink all the time. My disease has definitely progressed. I didn't use to drink all the time but I was definitely a binge drinker when I was younger and then I used cocaine for about 9 years during that time as well. Remarkably the coke was easier to give up, I started hating it but the alcohol, which I'm starting to hate, is so much harder for me. I know that I cannot do this without meetings and the help of my higher power, whatever form I choose to be my higher power. I have felt the power and I know it works, I just have to be committed now. Thanks for your support. Reading your posts help so much. They are so hopeful. I'm scared too and I wasn't before. I think it was because I was in denial, but now I want to have a happy life. I just got divorced and am moving this weekend to a new condo I bought. So I am very hopeful and feel that I can become the person I want to be. Again, thanks for your support, it really does help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thanks for replying. It feels so good to have people care and respond that don't even know me. I now have 2 days in, the most I have ever had so far is 14 days. I can't believe that at 40 years old I have finally realized that I am an alcoholic. Once I started to think about it, it was so obvious but I always thought I was OK, that it was normal to drink all the time. My disease has definitely progressed. I didn't use to drink all the time but I was definitely a binge drinker when I was younger and then I used cocaine for about 9 years during that time as well. Remarkably the coke was easier to give up, I started hating it but the alcohol, which I'm starting to hate, is so much harder for me. I know that I cannot do this without meetings and the help of my higher power, whatever form I choose to be my higher power. I have felt the power and I know it works, I just have to be committed now. Thanks for your support. Reading your posts help so much. They are so hopeful. I'm scared too and I wasn't before. I think it was because I was in denial, but now I want to have a happy life. I just got divorced and am moving this weekend to a new condo I bought. So I am very hopeful and feel that I can become the person I want to be. Again, thanks for your support, it really does help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Carol,
Thanks for your support as well. I didn't mean to not thank you in the same post but I started rambling about myself and realized I forgot. Thank You.
Thanks for your support as well. I didn't mean to not thank you in the same post but I started rambling about myself and realized I forgot. Thank You.
Good start, keep up the fight!
Otis, (and others who care)Thanks for your thoughts, I know they weren't directed to me but your words touched me tonight, somehow, never the less. Interesting, after 23 + years staying sober, I can't recall how many meetings I have been to and still someone (without them actually trying) speaks (or writes) and I fiind myself moved and realize again my spirit has been touched as well.
Thanks. It is so worth it. Both sides benefit from such a meaningful post.
To anyone working the "program" and/or fighting the brain disease "alcoholism"
keep in mind we do it ONE DAY AT A TIME and it can/will and does work.
Best to all. Sometimes it may seem hopeless but I know (from experience) it
will help someone asking for help, looking for help and believing in thier hard work. True , it may just land at your feet @ your doorstep but searching for a
few words of help will be quicker and you can begin benefiting that much sooner.
Grandpa Allen
ps (in total honesty)
My daughter is heading to the hospital at 5:00am Friday to have her third baby, A boy, my 7th grandchild. I ask for your prayers and pass on I am grateful and
know well how incredibly "Lucky" I am. God Bless everyone. Life is beautiful.
Thanks. It is so worth it. Both sides benefit from such a meaningful post.
To anyone working the "program" and/or fighting the brain disease "alcoholism"
keep in mind we do it ONE DAY AT A TIME and it can/will and does work.
Best to all. Sometimes it may seem hopeless but I know (from experience) it
will help someone asking for help, looking for help and believing in thier hard work. True , it may just land at your feet @ your doorstep but searching for a
few words of help will be quicker and you can begin benefiting that much sooner.
Grandpa Allen
ps (in total honesty)
My daughter is heading to the hospital at 5:00am Friday to have her third baby, A boy, my 7th grandchild. I ask for your prayers and pass on I am grateful and
know well how incredibly "Lucky" I am. God Bless everyone. Life is beautiful.
Grandpa Allen,
Congratulations!! How exciting. I feel blessed and lucky that I have such a wonderful daughter and can't imagine how wonderful it would be to have 7 grandchildren and your own children as well. Thank you for your support and your words of wisdom. I am just starting to grasp the concept of one day at a time. It was becoming overwhelming for me to think about having a certain amount of days sober so I am trying not to focus on that and focus on just today. It's hard to explain but I just couldn't exactly grasp one day at a time and now I feel like I can and I don't feel as overwhelmed or like I'm trying to out do my length of sobriety. Does that make sense? Anyways, congratulations and I am praying for you and your daughter and the new baby.
Congratulations!! How exciting. I feel blessed and lucky that I have such a wonderful daughter and can't imagine how wonderful it would be to have 7 grandchildren and your own children as well. Thank you for your support and your words of wisdom. I am just starting to grasp the concept of one day at a time. It was becoming overwhelming for me to think about having a certain amount of days sober so I am trying not to focus on that and focus on just today. It's hard to explain but I just couldn't exactly grasp one day at a time and now I feel like I can and I don't feel as overwhelmed or like I'm trying to out do my length of sobriety. Does that make sense? Anyways, congratulations and I am praying for you and your daughter and the new baby.
