Isnt it funny how the mind works? Days away from seeing my son and yet now is the time I seem to miss him the most. As such I thought perhaps sharing one of the poems I wrote about him might help me so here goes..
Echoes Of A Childs Laughter
The times spent, his little hand in mine
We would walk the paths to the park
Previously unknown joy found in the relationship between Father and Son
The sound of his inquisitive voice, questioning everything would bring a smile to my face
Precocious in nature, innocent in his ignorance of lifes harsh lessons yet to be learned
Satisfied in the knowledge of his protection and unconditional love
This is my Son, the embodiment of my hopes and dreams
No more perfect thing have I accomplished
The dream however was not meant to last
The knife has been cast and its target found in the centre of my back
The vision of the white picket fence gone
Harsh reality sets upon me; I can understand the undertow that led to this moment
Does he, can he?
I stand alone now on those very same paths we would walk
My hand the lesser for the lack of his held in my grasp
I hear only now the echoes of his laughter; I miss the look of happiness on his face
The swings stand empty, the teeter-totter unoccupied
It seems now only memories of ghosts exist
Should I not be bitter, should I not rage?
Does he understand why I do not tuck him in at night?
Why his Father is not there to dry the tears that forms after a scraped knee
Will he not look behind him while learning to ride a bike and not wonder where his Father Is?
What forces would deprive us both of these moments that are the things pleasant dreams are made of
I will forever wait upon these paths to the park if need be
I pray that one day I will look up to see his face as he runs towards me
The joy of our reuniting duplicated in his smile
Until than I wait
Daddy loves you Zachary, Big time
Wolf,
WOW!!!
Lots of emotion in that poem.Save it for your boy.Oneday he will understand.
You may not be w/ him all the time, but the time that you are w/ him,make it count.
Live in the here and now.Show him that you are changing for the better.For yourself and him.
You sound like a very loving father.And i'm sure he loves you very much.
DJ
WOW!!!
Lots of emotion in that poem.Save it for your boy.Oneday he will understand.
You may not be w/ him all the time, but the time that you are w/ him,make it count.
Live in the here and now.Show him that you are changing for the better.For yourself and him.
You sound like a very loving father.And i'm sure he loves you very much.
DJ
Thanks DJ I appreciate that. I thought I would post one of the other poems I have written about my son.
A Daydream
I stand alone behind all the other lemmings in the store
Waiting to play my part as a good little consumer
The wait continues and so I look around
To my left a young couple joke with each other
Their obvious loves radiates from them like a visible aura
Behind them parents play with their child as they to wait
I look down into my shopping cart and see frozen dinners canned meals
The food of the lonely
I close my eyes and daydream about the time when it was me in line with my family
My son looking up at me with unconditional love
My wife and I teasing each other about our purchases
A clearing of a voice brings me out of my fantasy
I have hindered the lady behind by slowing down her chance to throw her money away
With great trepidation I look once more at my cart
Still only the food of the single person is there
There is no child waiting to get home to play with his father
There is no wife waiting to snuggle on the couch
I long for what was, for what could have been, for what should have been
Regardless of this overwhelming sadness I smile
This is pain, just one of the many emotions I spent my life hiding from
I wore masks not to reveal my true self
I medicated so as to not have to feel
I understand that without pain there can not be joy
Heading towards the door I can not avoid one last glance towards the line up
Yet no magical transition has taken place
My family is not there
As I leave I realize I am faced with a choice
To dwell in this almost all consuming depression
Or to remember that I am lucky
Some have never even tasted the joy I received when this daydream was once real
I chose to be happy, to remember those times that make me joyful
To continue to dream and work towards the day when those smiles will return
A Daydream
I stand alone behind all the other lemmings in the store
Waiting to play my part as a good little consumer
The wait continues and so I look around
To my left a young couple joke with each other
Their obvious loves radiates from them like a visible aura
Behind them parents play with their child as they to wait
I look down into my shopping cart and see frozen dinners canned meals
The food of the lonely
I close my eyes and daydream about the time when it was me in line with my family
My son looking up at me with unconditional love
My wife and I teasing each other about our purchases
A clearing of a voice brings me out of my fantasy
I have hindered the lady behind by slowing down her chance to throw her money away
With great trepidation I look once more at my cart
Still only the food of the single person is there
There is no child waiting to get home to play with his father
There is no wife waiting to snuggle on the couch
I long for what was, for what could have been, for what should have been
Regardless of this overwhelming sadness I smile
This is pain, just one of the many emotions I spent my life hiding from
I wore masks not to reveal my true self
I medicated so as to not have to feel
I understand that without pain there can not be joy
Heading towards the door I can not avoid one last glance towards the line up
Yet no magical transition has taken place
My family is not there
As I leave I realize I am faced with a choice
To dwell in this almost all consuming depression
Or to remember that I am lucky
Some have never even tasted the joy I received when this daydream was once real
I chose to be happy, to remember those times that make me joyful
To continue to dream and work towards the day when those smiles will return
Wolf,
I'm sorry that i don't know much about your story.But i am very sorry that you are going thru this.I can say that i have been thru a devorice and i know those feelings of being alone.I had my son who was only 1 at the time and it was one of the hardest things to deal w/.But i am livin proof that life does go on.That it can be really good again.Give yourself time.
I am a stay at home mom so i'm usually on and off the computer all day.But if you ever need to talk or if there is something i can help you w/ please let me know.
GAPeach1003@CS.Com
DJ
BTW.
Another movin poem.
I'm sorry that i don't know much about your story.But i am very sorry that you are going thru this.I can say that i have been thru a devorice and i know those feelings of being alone.I had my son who was only 1 at the time and it was one of the hardest things to deal w/.But i am livin proof that life does go on.That it can be really good again.Give yourself time.
I am a stay at home mom so i'm usually on and off the computer all day.But if you ever need to talk or if there is something i can help you w/ please let me know.
GAPeach1003@CS.Com
DJ
BTW.
Another movin poem.
Thank you for the support. I appreciate it in fact I am always amazed at the support I see here. I must admit not all of my poems are doom and gloom. I would invite you to read my story. So far I have about 30 poems and the first 15 chapters of the book I am reading.
Unfortunately the website the book is hosted at is down right now but should be back up tomorrow. If youre interested you can find it at:
http://www.wastednetwork.com/wn_for...m/index.php?c=6
Unfortunately the website the book is hosted at is down right now but should be back up tomorrow. If youre interested you can find it at:
http://www.wastednetwork.com/wn_for...m/index.php?c=6
Thanks, i did try to go to the sie to read more on your story and it wouldn't come up.But i will go back tomorrow to read it.
I look forward to gettin to know you a lil more.
I hope you have a good nite.And enjoy your time w/ your son.
DJ
I look forward to gettin to know you a lil more.
I hope you have a good nite.And enjoy your time w/ your son.
DJ
hello,wolf
Great poems!!!I see you finished the chapter and i got it emailed to me.But,the server has been down .i havent checked today to see if it was back up and running.I will check alittle later. Thanks for shareing,crystal
Great poems!!!I see you finished the chapter and i got it emailed to me.But,the server has been down .i havent checked today to see if it was back up and running.I will check alittle later. Thanks for shareing,crystal
The last chapter posted was chapter 14. Since than I have written chapter 15 "Insanity Takes Hold" but I can't publish it until the site is back up.
Since I am leaving Sunday I was hoping to write chapter 16 and have it posted before I go.
Thanks for the support, sorry for the delay.
God bless.
Since I am leaving Sunday I was hoping to write chapter 16 and have it posted before I go.
Thanks for the support, sorry for the delay.
God bless.
You're a good writer Wolf. My daughter always did the same thing to deal with her feelings. She would write poems too. She is a good writer as well. Won't be long now and you will be with your son, holding his hand once again. Hang in there. The time is almost here.
Love,
Liz
Love,
Liz
wolfie,
isnt this the weekend you get to be with him?
When he gets older, and can read..give these to him...
in the mean time enjoy your weekend with your little man..
Hugs,
Ali
isnt this the weekend you get to be with him?
When he gets older, and can read..give these to him...
in the mean time enjoy your weekend with your little man..
Hugs,
Ali
Leaving this SUnday. I don't think I will be able to sleep until than. His mom tells me he is very excited to see me.
God bless.
God bless.
Wolf,
Your poem about your son was very touching. It also reminds of our father in heaven and how we are all his sons and daughters and how he may also feel this very way towards us.
Lovebird
Your poem about your son was very touching. It also reminds of our father in heaven and how we are all his sons and daughters and how he may also feel this very way towards us.
Lovebird
