i am a mother of two beatuiful girls. my husband has a every stressful job and his doctor now think he has IBS (irritable bowel syndrom). He was rx's Paxil and Lorazepan for his work days. But they seem to make him even worse at home. he is very short temptered and now i find out he take oxycocet (2-5) on the weekend along with "a little hash". I really don't know what to do. I have tried talking to him, but he just does not think he has any problems. My girls are asking me why daddy is so mean, my father is asking me why we are alway fighting.( he doesnot know my husband takes pills). I have asked, told baged him to slow down and try to quit but he gets very angry, and today he said I should just get a divorce. I still love the man i married, i just don't know where he is.....
DEAR LOVING WIFE ,
YOU CAN NOT MAKE HIM GET THE HELP HE NEEDS .BUT YOU CAN KEEP SHOWING HIM THAT YOU LOVE HIM .KEEP TALKING TO HIM WITH LOTS OF LOVE WITHOUT SOUNDING JUDGEMENTAL.HE IS NOT "MEAN" ON PURPOSE THAT IS THE DISTRUCTIVE PART OF BEING A DRUG ADDICT .ITS NOT THAT HE DOESN'T LOVE YOU AND THE KIDS ENOUGH IT'S THAT THE DRUGS HAVE CONTROL OF HIM.HE NEEDS PROFESSIONAL HELP THE PEOPLE WHO QUIT WITHOUT REHAB USUALLY DO NOT SUCCEED PAST A COUPLE OF MONTHS . IT DOES HAPPEN THOUGH SO DON'T GIVE UP ON HIM TURN OVER EVERY STONE YOU HAVE TO ., TO GET HIM TO GET HELP,THAT MEANS STOP HIDI9NG IT TALK TO PASTURES DOCTORS DRUG COUNCILERS NARC ANON WHO EVER YOU HAVE TO THAT KNOWS DRUG ADDICTION .
YOU CAN NOT MAKE HIM GET THE HELP HE NEEDS .BUT YOU CAN KEEP SHOWING HIM THAT YOU LOVE HIM .KEEP TALKING TO HIM WITH LOTS OF LOVE WITHOUT SOUNDING JUDGEMENTAL.HE IS NOT "MEAN" ON PURPOSE THAT IS THE DISTRUCTIVE PART OF BEING A DRUG ADDICT .ITS NOT THAT HE DOESN'T LOVE YOU AND THE KIDS ENOUGH IT'S THAT THE DRUGS HAVE CONTROL OF HIM.HE NEEDS PROFESSIONAL HELP THE PEOPLE WHO QUIT WITHOUT REHAB USUALLY DO NOT SUCCEED PAST A COUPLE OF MONTHS . IT DOES HAPPEN THOUGH SO DON'T GIVE UP ON HIM TURN OVER EVERY STONE YOU HAVE TO ., TO GET HIM TO GET HELP,THAT MEANS STOP HIDI9NG IT TALK TO PASTURES DOCTORS DRUG COUNCILERS NARC ANON WHO EVER YOU HAVE TO THAT KNOWS DRUG ADDICTION .
THANK YOU X-PILL JUNKY,
I will keep trying to get through to him if not for me but for his children. I was thinking that maybe I should call his doctor and ask him for help. I am afraid though of what he may do. ie. give him a rx for the perks or something new altogether. I noticed today a small yellow pill with tec on it with his perks and i don't know what it is. He is now accusing me of misplacing his things that I myself have never seen much less moved. I am at my wits end and very afraid that I will soon find myself planing a life without my husband.
I will keep trying to get through to him if not for me but for his children. I was thinking that maybe I should call his doctor and ask him for help. I am afraid though of what he may do. ie. give him a rx for the perks or something new altogether. I noticed today a small yellow pill with tec on it with his perks and i don't know what it is. He is now accusing me of misplacing his things that I myself have never seen much less moved. I am at my wits end and very afraid that I will soon find myself planing a life without my husband.
DEAR I NEED ANSWERS ,
THE THING YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND IS ADDICTION IS A MEDICAL ILLNESS JUST AS BAD AS CANCER , BOTH WILL TAKE YOUR LIFE LEFT UNTREATED .THE BAD PART ABOUT ADICTION IS IT NOT ONLY MAKES THE ADDICT SICK IT MAKES EVERYONE AROUND YHEM SICK . IKNOW I DON'T HAVE TO TELL YOU AND THE GIRLS THAT .HE IS VERY VERY SICK RIGHT NOW AND AS LONG AS HE IS USING HE CAN'T GET BETTER .KNOW ONE EXPECTS YOU TO TAKE THE ABUSE OF AN ADDICT BUT IF HE WILL TRY TO GET BETTER I THINK HE DESERVES A CHANCE THA'S ONLY A PERSONAL THOUGHT YOU KNOW YOUR HEART AND THE LOVE YOU AND HIM HAVE TOGETHER !I'LLBE PRAYING FOR YOU , HIM , AND THOSE PRECIOUS GIRLS . YOU HAVE TO TALK TO SOMEONE WHO CAN HELP YOU AND HIM DOCTORS PREACHERS YES THEY CAN HELP TOO DRUG COUNCILERS THAT WOULD BE THE GREATEST THING YOU COULD DO FOR HIM . WHATEVER YOU DO DO IT OUT OF LOVE .GOD BLESS YOU !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THE THING YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND IS ADDICTION IS A MEDICAL ILLNESS JUST AS BAD AS CANCER , BOTH WILL TAKE YOUR LIFE LEFT UNTREATED .THE BAD PART ABOUT ADICTION IS IT NOT ONLY MAKES THE ADDICT SICK IT MAKES EVERYONE AROUND YHEM SICK . IKNOW I DON'T HAVE TO TELL YOU AND THE GIRLS THAT .HE IS VERY VERY SICK RIGHT NOW AND AS LONG AS HE IS USING HE CAN'T GET BETTER .KNOW ONE EXPECTS YOU TO TAKE THE ABUSE OF AN ADDICT BUT IF HE WILL TRY TO GET BETTER I THINK HE DESERVES A CHANCE THA'S ONLY A PERSONAL THOUGHT YOU KNOW YOUR HEART AND THE LOVE YOU AND HIM HAVE TOGETHER !I'LLBE PRAYING FOR YOU , HIM , AND THOSE PRECIOUS GIRLS . YOU HAVE TO TALK TO SOMEONE WHO CAN HELP YOU AND HIM DOCTORS PREACHERS YES THEY CAN HELP TOO DRUG COUNCILERS THAT WOULD BE THE GREATEST THING YOU COULD DO FOR HIM . WHATEVER YOU DO DO IT OUT OF LOVE .GOD BLESS YOU !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My husband has been taking Paxil(anti-depressant), Tylenol with codeine(15+ a day),smoking Marijuana, and Alcohol, and only God knows what else as he has pill bottles around, I don't even know what is in them. After 4 years of this off/on pills, weed, booze; I just couldn't allow this to happen to me and my two teenaged sons any longer, accusing us of taking things from him and being a completely impossible person to live with, due to mood swings and the list is too long to even mention. My 14 year old has problems of his own that I need to focus on.(As a result of all of the fighting etc.? I don't know) This is a second marriage. I asked him to leave. I tried all kinds of things to help him realize what he is doing to himself and us, but nothing works. His own children 15 and 12 don't even want to come over to spend weekends any longer....
My dear "I need answers", it only seemed to get worse with time, unless your husband admits to his addiction and seeks help, things will get worse, you need to focus on your health and most importantly the health of your girls. I found out that by accepting to live this tense, walking on eggshells kind of life each day I was only enabling my husbands addiction. You may have to leave or have him leave temporarily to let him know how serious you are and that you are doing this out of love for him and for you and your daughters. He may deny his addiction still, but right now you need to focus on you and your girls. You may want to tell your Dad about everything, you will need a support system.
I wish you well, and I will include you in my prayers.
My dear "I need answers", it only seemed to get worse with time, unless your husband admits to his addiction and seeks help, things will get worse, you need to focus on your health and most importantly the health of your girls. I found out that by accepting to live this tense, walking on eggshells kind of life each day I was only enabling my husbands addiction. You may have to leave or have him leave temporarily to let him know how serious you are and that you are doing this out of love for him and for you and your daughters. He may deny his addiction still, but right now you need to focus on you and your girls. You may want to tell your Dad about everything, you will need a support system.
I wish you well, and I will include you in my prayers.