Okay by now you guys know me and if I am writting so much it's because I am having a TERRIBLE DAY.
I will list my b/f behavior can someone tell me how bad his addiction is......can;t stop worrying and thinking the worst..
1) Been on drugs for 12 years
2) In prison he got busted for using drugs
3) Got out of prison and disappeared for days at a time living in the streets using drugs
4) Can't hold a job
5) Hanging out with drug addicts and dealers
6) Likes to think he is a "bad boy"
7) Can be crying one minute laughing the next
8) Lies all the time
I just need to get your feedback I know what he is but what are the chances that he will ever lead a normal life??
Slim to none unless he admits he has a problem and gets help for it. Do you really love him so much that your willing t sit around and pray that day may come? I am sorry but there is nothing more than I hate than a liar! Addict or not I lose respect for anyone that lies to me. Sounds like you Bf has way to many problems for you to try and work out. It's your life and it would be great if he would change and you could stand by your man. It doesn't look like that's going to happen anytime soon....Especially if you are writing this stuff about him. Good luck~ Rae
1) Been on drugs for 12 years~ That's a long time.
2) In prison he got busted for using drugs~Will more than likely go back.
3) Got out of prison and disappeared for days at a time living in the streets using drugs~ Will probably disappear again.
4) Can't hold a job~ Red Flag! How can he support you if he can't support himself? Oh him and I wouldn't get along real good.
5) Hanging out with drug addicts and dealers~ That's a good way to get you in a bad situation.
6) Likes to think he is a "bad boy"~ That's always a great quality! Tough man syndrome!
7) Can be crying one minute laughing the next~Nothing like a man with PMS and a drug problem.
8) Lies all the time~ There isn't anything I hate more than a liar. So he never tells the truth? Is this the man you want to share your life with and marry oneday? You need to kick him to the curb and find yourself a man with some good qualities. Don't you think you deserve that? Is there anything positive about your BF?
1) Been on drugs for 12 years~ That's a long time.
2) In prison he got busted for using drugs~Will more than likely go back.
3) Got out of prison and disappeared for days at a time living in the streets using drugs~ Will probably disappear again.
4) Can't hold a job~ Red Flag! How can he support you if he can't support himself? Oh him and I wouldn't get along real good.
5) Hanging out with drug addicts and dealers~ That's a good way to get you in a bad situation.
6) Likes to think he is a "bad boy"~ That's always a great quality! Tough man syndrome!
7) Can be crying one minute laughing the next~Nothing like a man with PMS and a drug problem.
8) Lies all the time~ There isn't anything I hate more than a liar. So he never tells the truth? Is this the man you want to share your life with and marry oneday? You need to kick him to the curb and find yourself a man with some good qualities. Don't you think you deserve that? Is there anything positive about your BF?
Rae 73 you are right, hopefully I will hate it and not care so much but right at this moment I feel concern and am worry for him.
You are right though, I sound pretty pathetic/
You are right though, I sound pretty pathetic/
Hi Marie:
If he has been like this for 12 years and you have only been with him for 4, how did you get involved with him? What good points did you see that made you overlook all the rest and decide all the rest was OK to you?
From what you write and what you have written before, it doesn't look like your boyfriend has any desire whatsoever to get help or get clean or doing anything towards recovery.
That is the only thing you need to tell you that his addiction is VERY BAD and there is absolutely nothing that you can do except save yourself.
Sorry to be blunt, but you do not deserve this.
Peace to you,
Mickey
If he has been like this for 12 years and you have only been with him for 4, how did you get involved with him? What good points did you see that made you overlook all the rest and decide all the rest was OK to you?
From what you write and what you have written before, it doesn't look like your boyfriend has any desire whatsoever to get help or get clean or doing anything towards recovery.
That is the only thing you need to tell you that his addiction is VERY BAD and there is absolutely nothing that you can do except save yourself.
Sorry to be blunt, but you do not deserve this.
Peace to you,
Mickey
hi marie, everything you listed is exactly my ex as you well know, i saw him in passing yesterday and i went to a na meeting and a oldtimer there heard my story of my ex and said i need al-alon, i was a lil taken aback, becuz i am a addict and know i need recovery, however when i saw my ex it brought up all kinds of feelings that i was not prepared for but i didnt use. i went to a meeting and talked about it. marie, when is the pain going to stop, only when you want it to stop, when we are involved with people who use or drink we get as crazy as they are. i spent way too long trying to cover up for my ex, trying to keep him out of jail and prison and took him to meetings, made sure he got to work and what did i end up with , nothing but being so codependant and obsessed with saving him, i now am in recovery. you are without a doubt going to drive yourself insane if you dont stop obsessing over this man, becuz i did it for a long time hoping and praying that the day would come he would be clean and sober, in june it will be a year that he moved and marie he is not clean and sober and i have to be WILLING TO ACCEPT that he may never be clean. we cant save anyone who doesnt want it and its not our job to save anyone but ourself and you are losing a big part of your soul by continuing to worry about something that you have no control over. please be gentle with yourself and do something nice for YOURSELF today
{{{hugs}}}
carol
{{{hugs}}}
carol
Marie,
Just checking in to see how you are doing this afternoon? I've been thinking about you today and want you to know if you ever need to talk just let me know. I am usually found on the pain pill site! Have a good day! Rae
Just checking in to see how you are doing this afternoon? I've been thinking about you today and want you to know if you ever need to talk just let me know. I am usually found on the pain pill site! Have a good day! Rae
marie,
hi my name is A, i have the same problem as you. Try not to listen to people that put u down. I know the exact feeling it feels like when someone tells u to walk. YEA OK!! PUt yourself in our shoes!! ITS hard. exp. when you are dealing with our hearts. Cause we love them so much its so hard. i dated someone for 3 yrs who used to cheat on me but never did drugs. THen at the end he did do drugs once in a while and i freaked wheni foudnout he did coc. we broke up and i started dating this big BAD BOY!! he was great treated me like gold but he was always doing K n Coc. I hated it!! exsp i dont do it. But he wasnt as bad with it. He broke up wiht me i was soo sad. and i met my issue now. People told me oh a dont talk to him hes got a huge coc problem. He broke his x'gf nose. he crazy watch out stay away. I was like ok. whatever gave him a shot. I liked him. TO me he was upset about his x. N according to him he never hit his x. Anyhow the truth came out. Hes a huge coc head. but the best guy in the world. Hes very good to me but we fight over stupid s*** most of the time becasue he on coc. I want to walk away n leave but i dont have the strength nor do i want to because i believe he will change. Im in an arguement with him today becasue last night he was doing coc. I saw him n i know he lied to me. hes mad at me for his reasons that he says i lied. whatever.
my point is im in our boat. Except i didnt walk away. i dont have much advise to give. WHen you did write what u feel about him yea it doesnt sound to great but anyone doing drugs doesnt sound to great. I learned not everyone is perfect in life. i need to talk so if u want to talk im here.
a
hi my name is A, i have the same problem as you. Try not to listen to people that put u down. I know the exact feeling it feels like when someone tells u to walk. YEA OK!! PUt yourself in our shoes!! ITS hard. exp. when you are dealing with our hearts. Cause we love them so much its so hard. i dated someone for 3 yrs who used to cheat on me but never did drugs. THen at the end he did do drugs once in a while and i freaked wheni foudnout he did coc. we broke up and i started dating this big BAD BOY!! he was great treated me like gold but he was always doing K n Coc. I hated it!! exsp i dont do it. But he wasnt as bad with it. He broke up wiht me i was soo sad. and i met my issue now. People told me oh a dont talk to him hes got a huge coc problem. He broke his x'gf nose. he crazy watch out stay away. I was like ok. whatever gave him a shot. I liked him. TO me he was upset about his x. N according to him he never hit his x. Anyhow the truth came out. Hes a huge coc head. but the best guy in the world. Hes very good to me but we fight over stupid s*** most of the time becasue he on coc. I want to walk away n leave but i dont have the strength nor do i want to because i believe he will change. Im in an arguement with him today becasue last night he was doing coc. I saw him n i know he lied to me. hes mad at me for his reasons that he says i lied. whatever.
my point is im in our boat. Except i didnt walk away. i dont have much advise to give. WHen you did write what u feel about him yea it doesnt sound to great but anyone doing drugs doesnt sound to great. I learned not everyone is perfect in life. i need to talk so if u want to talk im here.
a
Hi Rae73: You are so right in everything you have written but I can't seem to walk away even though we don't see each other as often. I am naive & still think he might change....the funny thing is that I have gone out and get approached by men and all I can see is my b/f, everyone is telling me I'm obsessesed which I think I am......
Tropical:I know I am driving myself to insanity, I am not sleeping well and am constantly thinking of him, can't seem to put him out of my mind.....
Mickey: I don't know how you made it for 12 years. When I met him I had no idea he had a drug problem I found out when I was already in love with him. He now seems more active in drugs then before, totally different person. But he cries so I feel he is hurting............
A: You sound as though you need to leave the relationship as much as I do.
Good luck I'm here for you.
Kittyc: Are you ok??
Tropical:I know I am driving myself to insanity, I am not sleeping well and am constantly thinking of him, can't seem to put him out of my mind.....
Mickey: I don't know how you made it for 12 years. When I met him I had no idea he had a drug problem I found out when I was already in love with him. He now seems more active in drugs then before, totally different person. But he cries so I feel he is hurting............
A: You sound as though you need to leave the relationship as much as I do.
Good luck I'm here for you.
Kittyc: Are you ok??
