Every once in a while--even every twice in a while--Pride and Self- (isness, centeredness, etc) start to creep back insidiously, pronouncing that they will be lurking every moment, waiting for a crack in my awareness; my contingent reprieve; my sobriety. I even have sucky days where something just doesn't seem "right," and my serenity is in jeopardy. Restless, Irritable, and Discontent.
Today was one of those days. Yes, I understand that I've been given the tools to start the day over any time I like, but I'm new at this--and sometimes I can't seem to hold the damned tools just so as my mother used to say when demonstrating something with her right hand and expecting me to understand (I'm left handed). I'd beat myself up for not "getting it," and you can see where THAT kind of behaviour landed me!
Today, I just have to get through the day. Sober.
SKG:
Thank you for sharing....and reminding me that we are all human, good days and bad.
I'll be thinking of you.
Thank you for sharing....and reminding me that we are all human, good days and bad.
I'll be thinking of you.
Gidday Skg
Remember always in the background is the fact you are sober so no matter how sh@t a day is there is always gratitute for that, and on this i can build gratitude and fix the parts of the day that i have F'd up...or sit back and try and see what it was that was really annoying me:)
light and love Zac
Remember always in the background is the fact you are sober so no matter how sh@t a day is there is always gratitute for that, and on this i can build gratitude and fix the parts of the day that i have F'd up...or sit back and try and see what it was that was really annoying me:)
light and love Zac
Skg, you got through the day, you worked on it, you remembered all the tools you have to work with, you were consciously dealing with it. You are amazing!!
From Daily Reflections:
It's a bitter pill, this sobriety thingy sometimes. And even if I recognize the problem, there's always the question of, "Which of these Spiritual Principles is gonna work on this problem today?"
Honesty--Honesty will STOP the spread, but how will being honest make this bad feeling go away?
Hope--Is there someone who has done something like this, and had success, that I can talk to?
Faith--Is there something someone else has done that may work in this situation?
Courage--Is it necessary to suck it up and walk through this even though I am afraid?
Integrity--Is this something I need to tell someone else even if it's uncomfortable?
Willingness--Do I need to be willing to change my perspective?
Humility--Is there a lesson in humility and growth that I must learn in order to grow? "A clear recognition of what and who we really are, followed by a sincere attempt to become what we could be."
Love--Is love and trust--giving of myself to another--required?
Discipline--Do I need to continue forth?
Patience--Is it time or will waiting fix the pain?
Awareness--Am I overlooking my faith and do I need to pray for answers?
Service--Will helping them help me rid myself of this problem?
I can manufacture my sobriety, but I need to understand The Principles and practice them in all my affairs to be successful. THIS is what I learned.
| QUOTE |
| OVERCOMING SELF-WILL March 3, 2008 So our troubles, we think, are basically of our own making. They arise out of ourselves, and the alcoholic is an extreme example of self-will run riot, though he usually doesnt think so. Above everything, we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness. We must, or it kills us! ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 62 For so many years my life revolved solely around myself. I was consumed with self in all formsself-centeredness, self-pity, self-seeking, all of which stemmed from pride. Today I have been given the gift, through the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous, of practicing the Steps and Traditions in my daily life, of my group and sponsor, and the capacityif I so chooseto put my pride aside in all situations which arise in my life. Until I could honestly look at myself and see that I was the problem in many situations and react appropriately inside and out; until I could discard my expectations and understand that my serenity was directly proportional to them, I could not experience serenity and sound sobriety. |
It's a bitter pill, this sobriety thingy sometimes. And even if I recognize the problem, there's always the question of, "Which of these Spiritual Principles is gonna work on this problem today?"
Honesty--Honesty will STOP the spread, but how will being honest make this bad feeling go away?
Hope--Is there someone who has done something like this, and had success, that I can talk to?
Faith--Is there something someone else has done that may work in this situation?
Courage--Is it necessary to suck it up and walk through this even though I am afraid?
Integrity--Is this something I need to tell someone else even if it's uncomfortable?
Willingness--Do I need to be willing to change my perspective?
Humility--Is there a lesson in humility and growth that I must learn in order to grow? "A clear recognition of what and who we really are, followed by a sincere attempt to become what we could be."
Love--Is love and trust--giving of myself to another--required?
Discipline--Do I need to continue forth?
Patience--Is it time or will waiting fix the pain?
Awareness--Am I overlooking my faith and do I need to pray for answers?
Service--Will helping them help me rid myself of this problem?
I can manufacture my sobriety, but I need to understand The Principles and practice them in all my affairs to be successful. THIS is what I learned.
Like that last post of yours SKG!
Maybe I should print this. Think, study, practice and share this with my church support group. I wonder if the woman there would be responsive, see the similartarties. I certainly do. Thank You for sharing!
Maybe I should print this. Think, study, practice and share this with my church support group. I wonder if the woman there would be responsive, see the similartarties. I certainly do. Thank You for sharing!
