Question

I've been reading the posts on here quite regularly and find them helpful. Well my bf is a crack addict and he smokes, smokes pot occasionally. I don't do any of those things, i'm pretty straight, I drink once in a long while though.
Well he have this ongoing argument and I personally think its quite clear what the answer is but my bf thinks otherwise..
Maybe you guys can help...He says he's healthier than me AND his sister. For one because his sister is overweight. I said his sister doesn't do drugs, or drink, she's just overweight so I'd still say he's unhealthier because he uses crack, pot and smokes cigarrettes. Then he said he's healthier than ME because he can run faster, swim (ya okay, I don't know how to swim) and he can lift heavier weights. Well sure, he's stronger than me, he's a guy! I am the weight I'm supposed to be, I excersise and am fit and I dont' do drugs so can a drug addict POSSIBLY be healthier than me just because he works out?
He's basically using inane arguments to justify his using.
It's all a load of BS.
As far as being mentally fit, you've got his butt kicked because he obviously doesn't see that he has a problem and is trying to turn the focus back on you (or his sister).
And being mentally fit is just as important (if not more) than being physically fit.
Don't listen to that.
How's it going otherwise?
Mickey
Thanks Mickey! Otherwise, not too good, after I asked his mom that question he said what do women know anyways, they shouldn't even be allowed in the workplace, they should just be at home cooking and cleaning!!
Loser.
Hello...this is my first time writing in here .I`m hoping someone in here can help me. I know that alot of people in here can put alot of input on what it`s like living with a recovering addict. I live with one now.He`s such a good person when he wants to be only lately he doesn`t seem to want to get along with any of us in this house. He`s in good mood one day and mean as hell the next three.He seems to like having no one in the house talking to him.And he can`t seem to be happy so he doesn`t seem to want anyone else in the house happy either.This i`m trying to understand but my tennager is really upset by his actions. He doesn`t seem to ever look for the good in her only the bad. And i really don`t think he evens sees what he`s doing to my daughter.He always blamed her when it`s his bad mood that starts him going off .Someone please tell me if this is normal? This man lives with me but is not my childrens father. And my teenager has never been around a man so angry like he is. He loses his temper at the drop of a hat .. Someone ..PLEASE .tell me what to think about this ..I`m about as lost with what to do ..Any advise would be greatly appreciated......Feeling Lost
Feeling Lost~
First and foremost~ welcome. I do not claim to be an expert, because I come here for support as do so many others. But I know, your childrem MUST come first. I am a teacher, and I see the other end of the problems at home. You are allowing your man to teach your children what is exceptable in your house- and what is exceptable in a relationship. None of that should be allowed. They are learning that it is okay to treat a loved one with DIS respect. Your daughter will learn that it is okay to be in a relationship with a man that is direspectful and Your son will learn that treating a woman like that is allowed. ( I don't remember which you had so I said it like that.) Is this behavior normal? Probably. Many of us deal with it like you do. And many of us stay for "love". Woman are made to fix problems. And we stay with men, because we feel like we have to FIX it. Well, I am beginning to realize, it has nothing to do with me. BUT everything to do with HIM. What are your priorities? What is important to you? You have to search yourself to find answers to questions you don't want to admit the answers to. Good Luck and when you feel down, or have any questions, PLEASE ask... we all as well as myself will be here to support you. Best of Luck!
Thank You Blondie ..but im afraid i`ve given you the wrong impression of this man . He is so good hearted and kind and caring...until recently. I think hes going thru something and just not telling me what it is. Maybe it`s not doing drugs anymore or the affect the aftermath has had on him.I`m not making excuses for him just trying to understand how he has changed.Sometimes, i don`t think he even realizes the anger inside him and other times i think he is trying to control it but doesn`t know how to.I care very much for him and i know he`s trying to deal with his demons.Hopefully, he will be able to work past all this and be happy with himself again .I sure hope so ....
feeling, did you know him when he was active in his addiction ?