Here goes...
I'm addicted
I'm 27yr old, I have been smoking since I was 20, I had my first "spliff" when I moved into my new apartment a friend brought some for me to try as I was "growing up" after the first few pulls I felt every inch of my body just relax and go into a state is mind I hadn't been in before. All the world problems and everything going on in life just disappeared, it was like I had 100kg lifted off my shoulders. From there it progressed to having it on a weekend after a night out so I didn't feel the hangover, eventually it became a daily occurrence! What had made me want it so much???
After a few years of having 1 or 2 a day I started loosing friends as they didn't want to know a moody guy around, I stopped going out after work and became I recluse, even going home on lunch hour for one to help me get through the day. My self worth and confidence didn't seem to be affected or at least I didn't think it was, as I became more dependant on it id be having wake n bake, making sure a pre rolled was waiting once I finished work. I decided enough was enough and booked a flight to travel the world with the mrs which I thought would be a great way to help quit, out of my comfort zone and couldn't access any dealers, eventually ended up In Byron bay in Australia camping with hippies it wasn't long before I sniffed out the dealers and I was starting to smoke again after being 'clean' for 3month.
After moving to New Zealand to work and earn money we were in the 2011 earthquake which triggered ptsd, anxiety and depression, the answer to this was to book a flight to Amsterdam after struggling with the aftershocks and tremors, there were a few! So after not seeing family or friends for near on 14month I was in a coffee shop rolling up( it did feel good)
Fast forward 6months I was attending a councillor for depression was taking meds for it. That made me feel like a robot and didn't want to move from the house, I became increasingly angry at the world, weed made my mind a haze so I didn't feel like the world hated me, I'd be full of confidence when I had it, anyway it's been 4 years since and I'm due to have my first baby with my fiance but I know I'm pushing her away! I always said once we know we are starting a fam is stop smoking! The increasing urge to go and score is breaking us, I'm
Scared I'll loose everything!
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE HELP!!!
AND THEY SAID POT ISN'T ADDICTIVE....BULL****.....have you ever attended any 12 Step Meetings...NA CA AA etc. ? first step is admitting you have a problem then stepping into a meeting where others are suffering as well...believe me if you go long enough you will hear your own story...amazing...there is a solution!!
Your story is so similar to mine... Today I have made the decision to quit smoking pot and it would help to know someone who is going through the same things I am...
Hey Lindsey I think it would be worth a shot! How can we do this?
