I am a mother of a 23 year old addict. I've recently discovered that he is now addicted to meth and heroin. His drugs of choice in the past has been alcohol and marijuana. I am at a loss of what to do and calm this hurt in my heart. He inherited a house, cars, motorcycle from his late father and is on the verge of losing it all. He has already lost his truck and will more then likely lose his house. The house is completely paid for and was a very nice home at one time. He and his fellow addicts have trashed it, but still live in it. He has no water no heat no electricity!!! It is now winter time in Colorado and it is freezing! He is choosing to stay in the house instead of going to families homes to stay warm!! I know that is enabling him, but I'm not quit to the point where I can't stop feeling like I need to take care of him!!! Today he told me to f*** off and leave him alone.....I can't stop crying as I FEEL so hurt! I know this isn't about me, but I need some help to deal with letting go, although my one and only child is slowly killing himself! Any words of wisdom would be much appreciated, as I don't know where to start to let go of my children.....
Shana ,Call the authority's and have your son baker acted immediately. ...baker act is a 72 hour hold for someone who is deemed a danger to themselves or others...upon having him Baker acted get power of attorney of over him so you Will be able to get control of his finances home etc.......I know it sounds drastic but right now he is spiraling on a downward spiral.......once baker acted do your best to get him to go into a drug program.....
shanas, look for Al-Anon and Nar-Anon in your telephone book or on-line. Call them.
They are 12 Step groups for family and friends of alcoholics/addicts. They have been where you are.
Alcoholics/addicts have to hit bottom and suffer before they begin to see the light and surrender.
It's painful to watch. Al-Anon and Nar-Anon will help you get your life back.
All the best.
Bob R
They are 12 Step groups for family and friends of alcoholics/addicts. They have been where you are.
Alcoholics/addicts have to hit bottom and suffer before they begin to see the light and surrender.
It's painful to watch. Al-Anon and Nar-Anon will help you get your life back.
All the best.
Bob R
I did try that..when he was taken to the ER a couple of weeks ago because he OD and then left against medical advice. The police told me they could not arrest him for being high! I then got him to the ER again a week later, due to an injury to his arm. I asked to speak with a social worker, she never showed up. I tried to talk to the ER nurse and PA, but they told me because he was not under the influence at that time there wad nothing they could do!! I'm frustrated with the system and can't seem to get ANYONE to listen!!!
Shana I understand my son has been a herion addict for over 10 years...I understand how our voices often and to many times fall upon deaf ears....it is hard enough that we are often told that there is nothing we can do as they are adults. ..did you contact the local authorities based on the fact of the overdose and the er visit that should enforce your request for the baker act...it they don't listen I have even gone so high as our local state senator and town legislation. .contact a lawyer often they will give you a free consultation over the phone...You cannot sit back you keep that voice going until someone turns a ear and listens...and if all else fails call the police and tell them there is drug activity in the j one ....keep fighting ....You are fighting for the biggest prize...your sons life.Another thought as the house is in Colorado it is winter no heat or electric can't you call the health dept and have the house deemed un inhabitual......exhaust Any and every avenue.........
Thanks for more ideas christophersmom!! I will not stop fighting as I know he is my biggest prize!! Thank you for listening and giving me ideas from someone who KNOWS. Lots of times other family members and friends have no idea the feelings we feel as parents of addicts. I spike to one of my dearest friends this morning and all she could say was"I don't know what to say". Bless her for her, but it's good to know I am not alone in my battle and there are many more mother's, father's, wives, husbands, etc. Fighting right beside me for the sake of their loved ones. It's been a very emotional time for me and its hard to quit crying, but I think my heart needs a good cry as I have tried to be strong for way to long.
Shana,I understand your feelings your emotions your loneliness. ..I want to help you anyway I can two heads are always better then one...I am here for you...I'll do my best to give you my best advice. ..after all I'm fighting for my son too...ill fight along side you for your son and you as well.I researched baker laws in Colorado your son definitely qualifies for it..as I said it'll hold him for 72 hours they will have him speak to mental health experts and it might possibly be the first step....
Thank you again!!! I received a call tonight from my sister, telling me that my son had been to her house drunk and in a rage. She had to call the police on him, but they were not able to find him. He had also been at a downtown business wrecking havoc and the police had been called again. As far as I know they have not picked him up but I sit here praying they do. Maybe I can at least get them to take him to detox and evaluate him on a hold. I hope they find him, as it is very cold tonight and I worry that he will pass out in the cold and freeze. Please all, pray that he is found and hopefully can get the help he needs! One very worried mom here.
Shana, I pray he is found....now with the overdose the er the occurrence at your sisters and what happened with downtown...if all that isn't a scream for help then they aren't listening. ...demand a baker act...and if they start giving you any flack....tell them you are going to call a lawyer immediately that if anything happens to your son you will hold them responsible...I'm sure your son is at one of his so called friends homes.....please update us ...we care.Also based now upon his actions contact a lawyer with all you have you can get power of attorney and with that in hand you can hopefully get some power in saving him you can be made his health proxy and you can have some power in trying to save his home .Also stay in contact with the police if they haven't found him...put out a missing person report on him......don't give up be vocal and show the police you are on them for them to do their job.
Shana ,No word from you I have you and your son in my prayers..hope your ok....
