Saw this topic recently. Should the casual drinker not drink with in sight or the presence of alcoholics? Some say it's the alkie's job to control their urges and others find it questionable that one would drink around an alkie.
At events, dinners, special occasions etc should the casual drinker drink around or near the alkie? At big events it would all but impossible unless it was considered a dry event. But for smaller friend or family gatherings in a residence shouldn't restraint be shown? Wouldn't not drinking be considered a boundary or ground rule for all. And be leading by example.
I know too many parents in particular refuse to stop drinking and put all the blame/responsibility on the alkie to control themselves. Not only does it not work their casual attitude toward liberal drinking probably contributed a little anyway to family/children alcoholics. The family history appears to be observed behavior rather than some genetic need/family history.
I think it is preference of the person. Alcohol is everywhere, so the alcoholic does eventually need to confront that and have a plan. But I always choose to not drink around friends and family in recovery. It is healthier for me anyway, and seems like a respectful thing to do. I mean, when I am on a diet, I appreciate when friends don't snarf down a cinnamon roll in front of me. : ) Although they surely can.
I have the same thoughts as P2
I have a slightly different view as a recovering alcoholic. It is my responsibility to work my program. I am the only one who can control whether or not I take that first drink. Alcohol is everywhere. I can't expect others to change because I have an addiction. It is my burden to take of care.
So, yes, others drink around me. If I feel weak then I work my program to get me thru. There is no other way.
So, yes, others drink around me. If I feel weak then I work my program to get me thru. There is no other way.
For the most part I agree with those who say the alkie should be the ones controlling and dealing with temptation. But for family in particular shouldn't they be the ones leading by example more than others?
Again I get/understand it's individual responsibility but especially in the early stages of recovery would not drinking help someone get through the early days of their sobriety or program.
Again I get/understand it's individual responsibility but especially in the early stages of recovery would not drinking help someone get through the early days of their sobriety or program.
When I was in my early days of recovery, I locked myself up in my house on the weekends to avoid alcohol. The thought of being around others drinking and I could not terrorized me. So in that regards, yes it would have been nice to go some place that I knew alcohol wasnt involved. But then again, i still would have locked myself up because even without the temptation in front of me, the temptation was still in my heart and I would have stopped to buy some on my way to visit.
So yes it would have been nice but no it wouldn't have made one bit of difference with my cravings. That is why I focused on not expecting others to change for my addiction problems.
I hope this helps...
So yes it would have been nice but no it wouldn't have made one bit of difference with my cravings. That is why I focused on not expecting others to change for my addiction problems.
I hope this helps...
