Please guide me my son who is 18 and not living at home is using drugs from speed to heroin.
I am going to my first tough love meeting tonight in the hope that I can help in some way. He has asked to move back home but the rest of the family have such a terrible time when he is here. How can I save my son?
Mary,
you cannot force your son, only your son can decide if he is ready to stop. You can support and love your son. Forcing him to detox/rehab may only make things worse. I have come out many times to only use that night. I know it must be tearing you upart to watch, but the only thing i can say is stay strong and let him know you are there to help. Not to suppot his habbits.
good luck
raerae
you cannot force your son, only your son can decide if he is ready to stop. You can support and love your son. Forcing him to detox/rehab may only make things worse. I have come out many times to only use that night. I know it must be tearing you upart to watch, but the only thing i can say is stay strong and let him know you are there to help. Not to suppot his habbits.
good luck
raerae
Hi Mary,
I believe that everyone from 18 to 70 that uses deep down inside knows that it suxs and wants to stop. i started using H around the same time as your son is now but I was in the "H" zone as I like to refer to it. Nothing and i mean nothing came before it. It consumed my every thought. As soon as i would wake up in the morning it was on my mind - "Do i have enough money"; "Is it too early to call my dealer (assholes); 'Do you think he might give me credit" etc etc... Your day becomes comsumed with these thoughts and the only people you hand around are people who are on the same mission as you "to score".
It doesn't mean that you stop loving the people that you are close to ie. mum. dad etc it's just that it changes you without you even knowing. I remember on one day my mother said to me "Your not Kyle...where has he gone" she said she felt like she was looking at someone else; she probably was. The Kyle that she had loved and raised as a child was disappearing before her eyes and there was nothing she could do - I could see her pain and do nothing...
Heroin makes you very selfish and untrustworthy. Herion addicts are the best liers in the world.
But as you know if you have read any of my other posts there is always hope. Never give up. No matter what happened my parents never gave up on me. They did offer at one stage to let me move back home, and even though i wanted to, i didn't want to put them through the pain. I was still using and it would not have helped them or me at that stage. Just let him know that no matter what you will always be there. Don't give him money....If he needs a bill paid or something, ask for the bill and pay it yourself.
Love
Kyle
I believe that everyone from 18 to 70 that uses deep down inside knows that it suxs and wants to stop. i started using H around the same time as your son is now but I was in the "H" zone as I like to refer to it. Nothing and i mean nothing came before it. It consumed my every thought. As soon as i would wake up in the morning it was on my mind - "Do i have enough money"; "Is it too early to call my dealer (assholes); 'Do you think he might give me credit" etc etc... Your day becomes comsumed with these thoughts and the only people you hand around are people who are on the same mission as you "to score".
It doesn't mean that you stop loving the people that you are close to ie. mum. dad etc it's just that it changes you without you even knowing. I remember on one day my mother said to me "Your not Kyle...where has he gone" she said she felt like she was looking at someone else; she probably was. The Kyle that she had loved and raised as a child was disappearing before her eyes and there was nothing she could do - I could see her pain and do nothing...
Heroin makes you very selfish and untrustworthy. Herion addicts are the best liers in the world.
But as you know if you have read any of my other posts there is always hope. Never give up. No matter what happened my parents never gave up on me. They did offer at one stage to let me move back home, and even though i wanted to, i didn't want to put them through the pain. I was still using and it would not have helped them or me at that stage. Just let him know that no matter what you will always be there. Don't give him money....If he needs a bill paid or something, ask for the bill and pay it yourself.
Love
Kyle