I don't have a lot of positivity to respond with right now. I just got home from work, and then picked up our 6 month daughter and walked into a 900 square foot condo where 2 large dogs needed to be walked. His mood swings and what I feel to be his inability to accept blame in this entire situation is starting to really wear on me. Let's hope for a better tomorrow. Maybe I just need some sleep...
Thanks again for your wise words. I find talking to you more comforting than a room of strangers if that makes sense! LOVE the mother in law comments-hahaha. And she is acting like, I shouldn't be upset after working all day that he couldn't even run the dishwasher b/c he has been through a lot and I need to understand that. MAKES ME WANT TO SCREAM!!! He is slowly apologizing to my parents and brothers and his family but yet, I keep getting told I don't understand. That is all that is said in that regards. I feel like he just expects me to standby him now no matter what. I know I keep saying me me me. But when is it my turn to sit him down and explain what he has done to me. How he took this bond and trust we had and destroyed it? How his disease almost destroyed our family? I am so happy he is clean and I know he takes it one day at a time but he is slowly becoming that man I fell in love with. I just wish I could say some things where he isn't yelling saying I have no idea what he is going through. I guess we all make sacrifices and this is one I have to make. Or maybe 6 months from now he will be ready to talk to me civilly about all of this. I will definitely keep you posted
Viola, I completely relate. COMPLETELY!!!! Hopefully with each day it will get better!
Well I completely had a breakdown Saturday night, I mean sobbing and all. I guess it was a good thing b/c he kept saying he had no idea how bad I was hurting during all of this. It was good to get it out. I was so drained after that I slept most of yesterday away. I think he now gets that his addiction effected the whole family!
Hi Kelli
i am glad you got to have your say, sorry you had to get so upset to get through to him- but maybe for the best- at least he now knows how you feel and what you have been left to deal with- i really hope clearing the air will help you to feel less frustrated - you never know this whole event may end up bringing you closer- i really hope things work out for you - you deserve it - look after you - thats what is important - he knows what he has to do to stay clean - wish you guys all the best -
i am glad you got to have your say, sorry you had to get so upset to get through to him- but maybe for the best- at least he now knows how you feel and what you have been left to deal with- i really hope clearing the air will help you to feel less frustrated - you never know this whole event may end up bringing you closer- i really hope things work out for you - you deserve it - look after you - thats what is important - he knows what he has to do to stay clean - wish you guys all the best -
Thank you so much Travelin' Man. We actually said last night that this will either tear us apart or bring us closer. He is starting to become a little more honest as well. Like explaining to me that the knot in his arm is a collapsed vein and that is why at the detox center they always had to take blood or IV in his hands. I told him these are things he needs to get off his chest then tell me. It can't be worse than the image I had in my head. His sugar cravings are starting to go away too. At this point, I will take these little victories as a success. Mentally I am just hoping he realizes how important he is and stays feeling strong! Keep you posted for sure!
I am a recovering heroin/opiate addict myself. I have 7 months sober now. thank God! I have created a website dedicated to helping people like your spouse, as i was once there myself. I pray that you may find something there useful.
addiction recovery tools: heroin, opiates, alcohol
God Bless,
addiction recovery tools: heroin, opiates, alcohol
God Bless,
