will its been a bade week, my husben and i have been fighting for 2weeks now, and there were a lot of nasty things said, to me i still can,t belive he said this but he said he wanted to live me, last year,wow, i was blown away, i was on hep,c treatment this time last year, he blames me for everthing from his yousing to his un happpynes. i don,t now how to deal with this evertime i want to talk he pushes me away, i was soo stressed last week i al most put myself in a program for our marige, but i can,t do it for him i have to do it for me. i think the only resone he is sticking a round is for the monny coming in, becuse i oue him so mush, and when things are going bade thats whan i want to yous. we have been maried 26 years the last 5 have been bade, becuse were both in our desise, im tierd of crying all the time a nd bagging him for monny. he is now better then me he thinks becuse he only takes 6 perks he is better then me what a bunch of b-- . i wake up everday whating for a arugument, eny help would be great thanks karen.
karen,
sounds like you are in a bad spot
my marriage was pretty crappy, yet i found it very hard to leave - 2 kids, comfort zone, etc, etc, etc
i finally just made up my mind to do it and left
it has been tough, but i can honestly say that i am a million times happier now!!!! and really it was much harder in my mind BEFORE I did it!!!! my fear of the unknown was making it seem SOOOO horrible!!! It was not easy, but it was not that hard either (Does that make sense??)
whether you decide to stay or leave, you DO need to stop using the drugs - but only you can make that decision and take the steps needed to do it!!
NA meetings would be a great place to start - not only about the drug use, but to find support in others that have been right where you are now - you can learn how to live a life without the use of drugs and find inner peace & happiness, become a better person & learn to love yourself
I refused to go to NA meetings for a very long time - I regret that now
But I am currently actively involved with an awesome NA group here and LOVE it!!!! I have also met an incredible guy there that went thru so many of the same things I did. In fact, we had our first "official" date yesterday / Sunday.
Life is looking good.....
Never thought I'd be where I am now.....
You CAN do it......
Good luck to you!!!
:-)
Swizzle
sounds like you are in a bad spot
my marriage was pretty crappy, yet i found it very hard to leave - 2 kids, comfort zone, etc, etc, etc
i finally just made up my mind to do it and left
it has been tough, but i can honestly say that i am a million times happier now!!!! and really it was much harder in my mind BEFORE I did it!!!! my fear of the unknown was making it seem SOOOO horrible!!! It was not easy, but it was not that hard either (Does that make sense??)
whether you decide to stay or leave, you DO need to stop using the drugs - but only you can make that decision and take the steps needed to do it!!
NA meetings would be a great place to start - not only about the drug use, but to find support in others that have been right where you are now - you can learn how to live a life without the use of drugs and find inner peace & happiness, become a better person & learn to love yourself
I refused to go to NA meetings for a very long time - I regret that now
But I am currently actively involved with an awesome NA group here and LOVE it!!!! I have also met an incredible guy there that went thru so many of the same things I did. In fact, we had our first "official" date yesterday / Sunday.
Life is looking good.....
Never thought I'd be where I am now.....
You CAN do it......
Good luck to you!!!
:-)
Swizzle
Karen, I've been to hell and back with my husband, but things are starting to get better. A marriage is work and you have to work on it. Like addiction, it won't fix itself. Try to get him to go to counseling with you. Anything is better than being miserable. If he won't go to counseling then you have some tough decisions to make. I've read some of your other posts too. Nobody should have to live in hell at home. Do what you can to save your marriage, but don't try to change him. It WILL NOT work and you will make yourself crazy trying. If things don't worh out at least you will know that you did all you could. I don't remember how much money you are getting, but if he's just sticking around for that maybe YOU should pack up and leave. If you know the marriage is headed for divorce, don't wait until your money is gone because you're going to need it. I hate to see you so unhappy. Are you still tapering? Getting off the pills will help you think more clearly and make rational decisions. Even though things are rough, please concentrate on getting clean. Things will only improve from that point. Take care, Atlas
Karen, Read the thread started by alicap. BCchic posted a link to a website about sub now being available in Canada. The thread is titled "Newcomer Saying Hello and Help."
Karen... i feel your pain... i really do. I can't give a whole lot of advice on this subject bc i have turned to the board for help with a similar situation before. I can tell you this and this is the truth... since i have some clean time on my side I feel more comfortable with who i am and what i want and deserve in this life. I urge you to go to a couple of meetings and see how you like them. When you get into recovery and stop clouding your mind with substances you start to see things for what they really are. You start to realize that those mean things that he says to you are far from true and that you don't deserve it. You start to realize that you are a person and that you can do anything when you put your mind to it. Karen, the first step is taking care of yourself. Keep coming back... we'll be here for you! Love and God Bless, Bri :)
