Hey guys, i appologize it has been a while but life has been busy and hectic. But it sure is getting so much better. I cant even begin to say how nice it is to be able to go to meetings again, they are helping me so much, I forgott how much the people there love and care, and even if you have been gone a while , you come back and it is just like being home with your family. So i wont bore ya'll with the boring details of the past little bit but i do need some advice. I am at my wits end with the divorce situation. I have the papaers all ready, but one small problem. My husband has dropped off the face of the earth, he went from calling a good 30 times a day to just dissapearing. I cant get ahold of him i tried, im a little scared that he came back home. Anyways, all this needs to get over and done with and not soon enouh if you ask me.I am going to go to his parents today, im not sure if they even know i am back, and ask about him and where he is........... but to be honest they are insane and scare the s*** out of me when they are mad............ and boy are they going to be mad. Is this a smart idea? i really dont know what else to do. Anyone out there who has some good advice up their sleeves for me. No one here is really helping they all like to ignore the situation and pretend it isnt going on around them...... i guess that is just life but..... anywho, any advice or input would be greatly apreciated!
pants
Hi Pants,
Glad to see you back posting. Sorry I don't have any good advice for you, but if you think his parents are going to be mad, then I guess you should telephone them instead of risking violence. At least you can hang up. Best of luck, honey. (((((Hugs)))) We care.
Glad to see you back posting. Sorry I don't have any good advice for you, but if you think his parents are going to be mad, then I guess you should telephone them instead of risking violence. At least you can hang up. Best of luck, honey. (((((Hugs)))) We care.
lol...............well arent i just a dork, not thinking of a phone......... no actually while we were away they moved , their number isnt listed, but i do have the address to the house. I wish i didnt have to see them face to face!
pants
pants
Pants Its me I didn't know you were on line. I didn't see you log on this morning. Big hugs I am here,
Jane
Jane
Hi Pants,
We've never talked before. I'm sorry you're having a difficult time with your soon-to-be ex-husband. I have no advice since I am in the very first stages of divorce and you sound like you've already got your ducks in a row.
If my husband were to disappear, I guess I'd call my lawyer and find out what I could do to track him down. Surely there are professionals who handle this sort of thing. It must be not uncommon.
Personally, I wouldn't go to his parents' house alone, if they are that insane and you are scared of them. Bring reinforcements.
Good luck. Hang in there.
Love,
Gina
We've never talked before. I'm sorry you're having a difficult time with your soon-to-be ex-husband. I have no advice since I am in the very first stages of divorce and you sound like you've already got your ducks in a row.
If my husband were to disappear, I guess I'd call my lawyer and find out what I could do to track him down. Surely there are professionals who handle this sort of thing. It must be not uncommon.
Personally, I wouldn't go to his parents' house alone, if they are that insane and you are scared of them. Bring reinforcements.
Good luck. Hang in there.
Love,
Gina
gina, i was just listening to that twisted sister song, how weird!!! Anyways, my thanks just for the supprt........ it sucks doesnt it. Im just trying to do it without a lawyer................ but what can you do.
i just had a friend call and tell me that maybe now i can file like he left me.........insted of me here just visiting family, i dont know, abandonment or something plus he hsnt given me a cent ever in a year let alone while im here so that is financal infadelity, so who knows maby this will help things get a bit easier. My parents think that i should fight for everything i can and get alomony. Me am still just trying kinda to walk away!!
Jane.................... thanks honey....... meeting sounding good todya?
pants
i just had a friend call and tell me that maybe now i can file like he left me.........insted of me here just visiting family, i dont know, abandonment or something plus he hsnt given me a cent ever in a year let alone while im here so that is financal infadelity, so who knows maby this will help things get a bit easier. My parents think that i should fight for everything i can and get alomony. Me am still just trying kinda to walk away!!
Jane.................... thanks honey....... meeting sounding good todya?
pants
I DID NOT KNOW HELLO KITTY HAD A BF !
how cute.
its just nice to see you posting again and it helps to have people
to communicate with, when your happy and when your sad or struggling.......
if it was not for this board, i would be even more isolated...
right now i am going back to working out everyday.....
and i know it will help with the winter blues........
and eating fruit in the am.........
i lost myself when i got caught up in the depresion cycle of the winter season and LACK of SUN.............
i have to make the best out of this, i can't change the weather....
so i have to change ME.....
i am going tanning once a week and working out........
i am not gonna sit here and be depressed anymore....
i have come here may times feeling so so down in my heart and after a few post and posting pretty picutres (with glitter)......
I feel much better.......
feels good to have a kind word to say to someone.....
and it is very healing also........
friends are healing........
and if you stay with positive people......
people can be healing...........
love.
and
kisses
hugs
and
wishes.........
God Bless you...........
thumper
lol............ wow she does have a bf and she is even dressing him already!!!!
that is so true thumper!!! i know i need to start working out again to,........... all though my arm muscles are getting strong, i have been working grave yards throwing freight and wow...........im geting buff............lol............ now if i could just work on my fat belly, and thighs ill be good to go!!!
Tanning sounds so good right now it is so cold!!!! maybe ill hit a meeting and take my sponcer with me after!
glad to see that you are possitive, fresh fruit is a great way to start your day!!!! go to cosco if you have one they sell fresh sliced pinnapple it is amazig!! for us people who dont have the pleasure of growing our own........lol
allright i am off to work now, i will catch ya'll later
pants
that is so true thumper!!! i know i need to start working out again to,........... all though my arm muscles are getting strong, i have been working grave yards throwing freight and wow...........im geting buff............lol............ now if i could just work on my fat belly, and thighs ill be good to go!!!
Tanning sounds so good right now it is so cold!!!! maybe ill hit a meeting and take my sponcer with me after!
glad to see that you are possitive, fresh fruit is a great way to start your day!!!! go to cosco if you have one they sell fresh sliced pinnapple it is amazig!! for us people who dont have the pleasure of growing our own........lol
allright i am off to work now, i will catch ya'll later
pants
hi pants!
welcome back to posting! i am confused, you said you are back and are going to talk with your husbands parents, what do you mean by back? arent you in utah???? please explain what happened, i know that you were tired of being in that apt (where was that?) and being controlled by your husband so you left and went to utah? now you are filing for divorce?? who were you living with when you left? just curious as to what happened to you. julie/jewels
thumper: i hope you are feeling better honey, you would never show that you were feeling down cuz you are such a positive person and your posts are always so special, so are your pictures. i didnt know things are that bad for you concerning depression. you dont take an ad do you? all i can say for me is that i cant function without paxil, whenever i have tried to switch to a different ad, i nosedive into the deepest depression. i know some people are able to fight depression by exercise, etc but for me there is a chemical imbalance that paxil seems to correct. here i will go find a glittery picture to make you feel better.. hang on...
there you go sweety,love u jewels
welcome back to posting! i am confused, you said you are back and are going to talk with your husbands parents, what do you mean by back? arent you in utah???? please explain what happened, i know that you were tired of being in that apt (where was that?) and being controlled by your husband so you left and went to utah? now you are filing for divorce?? who were you living with when you left? just curious as to what happened to you. julie/jewels
thumper: i hope you are feeling better honey, you would never show that you were feeling down cuz you are such a positive person and your posts are always so special, so are your pictures. i didnt know things are that bad for you concerning depression. you dont take an ad do you? all i can say for me is that i cant function without paxil, whenever i have tried to switch to a different ad, i nosedive into the deepest depression. i know some people are able to fight depression by exercise, etc but for me there is a chemical imbalance that paxil seems to correct. here i will go find a glittery picture to make you feel better.. hang on...
there you go sweety,love u jewels
when i went to court for my divorce and my ex didn't show up, it just made it that much easier for me. of course that was about 15 years ago, and i don't know it works now. But maybe you need to look on the bright side and maybe the jerk did drop off the face of the earth and it will just be better for you. Good luck to you and lots of love to you sister and thanks for your advice on my ordeal earlier. I'm here is you need someone to talk to. God Bless!
Hey ok........ let me straighten this hole thing out lol............ i was living with my husband when i left and we were living in VA, and moved back to UT, both of our familys are from here............so i am in the same state as family now, so it makes it much easier to communicate lol... and yes i have my papers but i am trying to figure out if there is a different way that i can do them now, if i can file that he left me or something like that.
I just got off work but on my break we called his house and they havent even talked to him either, i not sure if they are for reals or not but their story seems to mach up. I am kinda pissed of becuase i dont want to worry about the sob, but it is so weird that he stopped being in contact with everyone he was the most co-dependant person i think alive. I tried to call a few of my neighbors and no one ansewer so i am so confused as to what the heck is going on. All well maybe it will make things easier......... i sure as heck hope so this hole ordeal sucks...........
addicted, feel free to talk to me anytime as well........what you said was helpfull, i think that i have a 30 day period that if he doesnt reply that it is granted. Not sure exactly what that will do for his end but i hope it will do something to finally, give me the uper hand
well hope that cleared things up if not let me know :)
edit to add............. heck ya anything is better than being cooped up in that little apartment, life isnt great but it sure is better, i got a job a car and i just bought a horse so , what more could i ask for this soon after leaving right....
Pants
I just got off work but on my break we called his house and they havent even talked to him either, i not sure if they are for reals or not but their story seems to mach up. I am kinda pissed of becuase i dont want to worry about the sob, but it is so weird that he stopped being in contact with everyone he was the most co-dependant person i think alive. I tried to call a few of my neighbors and no one ansewer so i am so confused as to what the heck is going on. All well maybe it will make things easier......... i sure as heck hope so this hole ordeal sucks...........
addicted, feel free to talk to me anytime as well........what you said was helpfull, i think that i have a 30 day period that if he doesnt reply that it is granted. Not sure exactly what that will do for his end but i hope it will do something to finally, give me the uper hand
well hope that cleared things up if not let me know :)
edit to add............. heck ya anything is better than being cooped up in that little apartment, life isnt great but it sure is better, i got a job a car and i just bought a horse so , what more could i ask for this soon after leaving right....
Pants
Call the police in Virginia and report him missing. He'll probably turn up quick. Or, have someone from a different area code call him and maybe he will answer. He could just be avoiding your calls. Can you reach him through his school? Coach? Teammates? His job? Or, why speak to him at all? Or, just use the mail to contact him.
Even better, just ask your lawyer how to proceed without him. My friend was divorced after a long period of no contact with her husband. All they did was run an ad in the paper asking him to come forward, or something like that. He didn't so the divorce was granted without any problems at all. Maybe it would be easier that way?
It's not likely that you will get alimony because you have been married less than a year, and the only thing he aquired during that time was debt. You definately cannot claim he left you, because you left him.
Stay far away from the parents. They can't help. They will only get in the way or cause problems.
Good luck to you.
Even better, just ask your lawyer how to proceed without him. My friend was divorced after a long period of no contact with her husband. All they did was run an ad in the paper asking him to come forward, or something like that. He didn't so the divorce was granted without any problems at all. Maybe it would be easier that way?
It's not likely that you will get alimony because you have been married less than a year, and the only thing he aquired during that time was debt. You definately cannot claim he left you, because you left him.
Stay far away from the parents. They can't help. They will only get in the way or cause problems.
Good luck to you.
Atlas,
hey, it isnt the fact that he is ignoring my calls, his phone has been disconected. Your idea of calling the cops is a good one though, ithink that just may be the next step if no one has heard from him. I wasnt the one to call his parents one of my co workers did it who is a old friend of his and he said that it sounds like his parents dont even know that i am back. The alamony thing, i am not trying for, that is just my bitter parents trying to just make this so much harder.........lol......... you have go to love parents. I don't have a lawyer but i have a few family friends who are, so they just have been answering questions for me. But it is probably just time to relize that no matter what the cost it is so worth it to get this over and done with.
Hopefully he will stay missing , i mean i do hope that he is ok, but that would be awesome for it to just get granted because his lame a** is to afraid to step up and face life. I tried to call the school and he hasnt been in attendance there anymore, he hasnt showed up so they are kicking him off and maybe out of school, who knows............... URG this is so frustrating but i guess such is life.
Pants
hey, it isnt the fact that he is ignoring my calls, his phone has been disconected. Your idea of calling the cops is a good one though, ithink that just may be the next step if no one has heard from him. I wasnt the one to call his parents one of my co workers did it who is a old friend of his and he said that it sounds like his parents dont even know that i am back. The alamony thing, i am not trying for, that is just my bitter parents trying to just make this so much harder.........lol......... you have go to love parents. I don't have a lawyer but i have a few family friends who are, so they just have been answering questions for me. But it is probably just time to relize that no matter what the cost it is so worth it to get this over and done with.
Hopefully he will stay missing , i mean i do hope that he is ok, but that would be awesome for it to just get granted because his lame a** is to afraid to step up and face life. I tried to call the school and he hasnt been in attendance there anymore, he hasnt showed up so they are kicking him off and maybe out of school, who knows............... URG this is so frustrating but i guess such is life.
Pants
Pants, It's a good thing you had a friend who knew his parents new phone number so you guys could call. I am a little surprised his mother knows nothing about what is going on. Didn't she just not to long ago just show up at your home because she had not heard from him? Shantel
yup she sure did atleast 3 maybe 4 months ago. But she also just went through some major surgeries so is home all the time. Were i live is a small place(in people knowin people sence) all the county runs together, it isnt hard to find anyone who knows someone............... expecially with my religion in utah. But yes it is extremly odd that they dont know, i am more confused than ever!
Pants
Pants
JEWELS...........
thank you for your kind words and the pretty pics...
you know i loved that !!
i love U !
have a nice night.........
God Bless YOU.....
hello pants and everyone........
LOL..........LOL.........ha ha
goos night
thank you for your kind words and the pretty pics...
you know i loved that !!
i love U !
have a nice night.........
God Bless YOU.....
hello pants and everyone........
LOL..........LOL.........ha ha
goos night
Hey Pants:
I'm new to this site and not very computer literate, bear with me. I do have to say this is a fantastic site, lots of support and positive advice. Love it! It's probably a ploy (your husband) to get your attention, but it doesn't really matter as far as filing papers go. If you've already filed, I don't think it matters if he left or you left. I've even heard if someone dissappears or refuses to sign, it does'nt matter, after a certain length of time it will be finalized. He can't force you to stay married to him! Hang in there! PS I have lots of questions about this site and am not sure how to get answers????
I'm new to this site and not very computer literate, bear with me. I do have to say this is a fantastic site, lots of support and positive advice. Love it! It's probably a ploy (your husband) to get your attention, but it doesn't really matter as far as filing papers go. If you've already filed, I don't think it matters if he left or you left. I've even heard if someone dissappears or refuses to sign, it does'nt matter, after a certain length of time it will be finalized. He can't force you to stay married to him! Hang in there! PS I have lots of questions about this site and am not sure how to get answers????
hi.........
what kind of questions do you have?
this is a recovery site.....
very supportive and full of understanding, love and respect.......
so glad you found it.......
so glad to have you here........
thumper
what kind of questions do you have?
this is a recovery site.....
very supportive and full of understanding, love and respect.......
so glad you found it.......
so glad to have you here........
thumper
Thumper!!! Betty Boop is my fovorite that just made my night!!!!!
feel free to ask me any questions as well
pants
feel free to ask me any questions as well
pants
