TERROR OF DANGEROUS HABITUAL VICE
First time I started smoking was just a simple joke that became constantly hard to keep away. I was aware that this is going to ruin my life someday but it just I couldn't take it away. Its like I knew the consequences might be but its like there something preventing me to stop this habit. Addiction so they say. They say that if you have something that you constantly do for 2 consecutive weeks, its hard already to get rid of that activity. Actually at a young age I already experienced all the sufferings, all types of difficulties to escape from these harmful things. And you will always suffer, crave for more. The more you disregard the more it calls you to take more of it, absorb it, inhale it and you will just notice that you cannot live without it anymore.
I cannot recall how many times I said to myself to stop it already. My unconscious mind tells me to stop but consciously I keep on doing it. I also ended up telling myself words such as crazy, stupid, idiot etc. I was confuse because I am a musician and its like I have a mind set that musicians are all addicted to drugs, or you need to experience it while youre on your way through. Damn and its not. I mean ordinary people experiencing it too, whatever status they may have in this society. Professionals, students, ghetto youths, rich people, most of them are those who live in urban areas.
I realize that its a choice, and one choice could change a situation. You may choose to be what you are right now or you can choose to be someone else. You can choose to be someone but in the reality youre not really that one.
It has been a long time that been keeping to myself this situation. I adverted to this habit and forgot all the people that would really make me happy at all times. Not like this, not this.
IM BACK AGAIN
Hey Olegs,
It is a struggle. I am sorry to hear you're down.
You're a musician. Such talent. No pot needed.
One step at a time. It's good your recognize the problem now you have to work on it.
Keep your chin up. You can do this.
It is a struggle. I am sorry to hear you're down.
You're a musician. Such talent. No pot needed.
One step at a time. It's good your recognize the problem now you have to work on it.
Keep your chin up. You can do this.
