Hi there. Just in case anyone is interested I went to my clinic on Wednesday, and I swear I had not used heroin for over a week, so it should have been negative. But, it came back positive for opiates. I am absoloutly gutted. My counselor reckons it could be pain killers i.e. codeine based, which stupidly I never took in account! Then to top it all off I came out of my clinic, and sat in the waiting room , is my friend who has just come back from Thailand, offering to give me a lift, I had my son with me and so she gave us a lift home. Once home, my boy went to play at a friends house, and to cut a long story short, I f***ed up big time, and used. I am so pissed off, cos I was doing really well. I aint going to make any excuses, I just did it. Is this how it is always going to be? 1 step forward then 2 back?
Speak soon Claire
Hi Robbie, fancy a chat?
..claire..
..Thats a gutter for ya that ya test come up negative..but as long as you know you never used thats all that matters..Don,t beat yaself up about using on wednesday thou..as you said you did wot you did..pick yourself up mate and give it another shot..you,ll get thee one day as long as you keep the desire and
be honest to yourself..you,ll be ok mate..i relapsed more times than i had hot dinners when i was using claire..i know you must feel gutted with yourself..but ask yourself this..did you enjoy it..was it worth it.!!..d,ya think everytime you see your mates claire your gonna be weak and sucumb to temptation..im about for an hour claire if ya wanna chat..Robbie..
..Thats a gutter for ya that ya test come up negative..but as long as you know you never used thats all that matters..Don,t beat yaself up about using on wednesday thou..as you said you did wot you did..pick yourself up mate and give it another shot..you,ll get thee one day as long as you keep the desire and
be honest to yourself..you,ll be ok mate..i relapsed more times than i had hot dinners when i was using claire..i know you must feel gutted with yourself..but ask yourself this..did you enjoy it..was it worth it.!!..d,ya think everytime you see your mates claire your gonna be weak and sucumb to temptation..im about for an hour claire if ya wanna chat..Robbie..
Hi Robbie mate. Thanks once again for your words, you always seem to make sense to me. I do feel like crap about using on Weds and I also used yesterday too. I really don't wanna use today, but I never yesterday either.
Since I had this dabble, I have felt like s*** about myself, but like you say I can't beat myself up over it whats done is done eh?
I was really sick when I was booting, that ain't happened to me for ages, and as much as I hate to admit this it was bloody nice. I feel like a proper scumbag for saying that but it is true.
My brother has asked me and my son (only got the one by the way he is 8) if I wanted to stay with him and his girl, they are clean now, and I know that any habit is bad,, but what they called a habit and what I call a habit are 2 different things, but since they stopped using, they have become so patronising, and it drives me mad! So I am jut going to stay in and stay away from people, and come on here if it gets a bit to much.
I am from s.e.London, but I moved to Kent 2 years ago when it really hit the fan! COME ON YOU BLUES!
See ya later mate
loadsa love Claire
Since I had this dabble, I have felt like s*** about myself, but like you say I can't beat myself up over it whats done is done eh?
I was really sick when I was booting, that ain't happened to me for ages, and as much as I hate to admit this it was bloody nice. I feel like a proper scumbag for saying that but it is true.
My brother has asked me and my son (only got the one by the way he is 8) if I wanted to stay with him and his girl, they are clean now, and I know that any habit is bad,, but what they called a habit and what I call a habit are 2 different things, but since they stopped using, they have become so patronising, and it drives me mad! So I am jut going to stay in and stay away from people, and come on here if it gets a bit to much.
I am from s.e.London, but I moved to Kent 2 years ago when it really hit the fan! COME ON YOU BLUES!
See ya later mate
loadsa love Claire
..Claire..
..Thats the thing about the brown..your being honest when ya say it was nice..cos it was..i booted also..i get cravings still mate..i used to enjoy having a smoke..not just to stop me being sick..but running it up and down the foil was my buzz..putting it away for a while then going back to it..but we,ve got two choices in life..we either do or we don,t..i don,t wanna no more..i have,nt got a major reason why i don,t wanna stay clean claire..i just want to be clean..try and stay strong in yourself mate..i know how the drug drags us towards it..but you,ll be ready when ya ready..enjoy your easter mate..good luck and take care..Robbie..
..ps..wot part of s.e.london claire..i used to live in kennington..
..Thats the thing about the brown..your being honest when ya say it was nice..cos it was..i booted also..i get cravings still mate..i used to enjoy having a smoke..not just to stop me being sick..but running it up and down the foil was my buzz..putting it away for a while then going back to it..but we,ve got two choices in life..we either do or we don,t..i don,t wanna no more..i have,nt got a major reason why i don,t wanna stay clean claire..i just want to be clean..try and stay strong in yourself mate..i know how the drug drags us towards it..but you,ll be ready when ya ready..enjoy your easter mate..good luck and take care..Robbie..
..ps..wot part of s.e.london claire..i used to live in kennington..
