I hope you all had a nice evening. I didn't sleep a wink last night. I am so afraid for my b/f and the fact that I hit him makes it worse.
I noticed on Sunday that he talked and then he cried and it was as though he was in a rollercoaster. What will become of him, 35 years old, no job except maybe working once a week, no home, no nothing......it hust me so much that he didn't want to spend time with me and that he wanted to go back to his friends. In my sick mind I thought if we spend time together I could convice him to go home and that we could go to get some help for him.....
Laengr: I'm so sorry to hear about your wife, what a terrible time you and your kids must be going through....My b/f & I planned to marry that was my dream but that's no longer a dream that will come true.II hope your wife gets the help she needs so your family doesn't have to split up....
Kitty: How are you doing today? did yyou hear from your b/f? I don't think I will be hearing from mine anytime soon.Especially after I raised my hand to him the first time in 3 yrs.Did you sleep? I haven't had a good night sleep in weeks, I wake up at around 4:00 and can't think anymore.
When he first got out of prison and he would disappear for a week or so because of drugs he was sorry and was willing to listen and seek help. But ever since he got involved with his cousin and other drug addicts he is a different person....
At times I think this is a bad dream and I will wake up soon.
Marie I too keep thinking this is a bad dream...I'm still having a hard time with all of this. He came over last night for an hour. We got along for the most part but then again it was a whole hour that we spent together. He keeps talking about the same stuff..how he loves me and wants to marry me and that he wants things to work out, but all our fights and all our problems stem from his addiction which he's getting absolutely no help for. He keeps thinking he can do this on his own.
I did get some sleep finally, I was so exhausted from the weekend but I didn't get as much as I hoped. My ex called and it was so nice to talk to him and talk about normal, everyday things, took my mind off of things for awhile.
I just know that things will go right back to a nightmare with my bf, he has no money now but as soon as he does, its back to square one. I don't know how much I can keep doing this. It doesn't help that he comes over looking so cute either.
But where I had hope before I have none now. Its hard just to be here at work, I need a week off.
I did get some sleep finally, I was so exhausted from the weekend but I didn't get as much as I hoped. My ex called and it was so nice to talk to him and talk about normal, everyday things, took my mind off of things for awhile.
I just know that things will go right back to a nightmare with my bf, he has no money now but as soon as he does, its back to square one. I don't know how much I can keep doing this. It doesn't help that he comes over looking so cute either.
But where I had hope before I have none now. Its hard just to be here at work, I need a week off.
Kitty: I'm glad that you and your b/f had a nice visit. Does he work? I wish I could letgo and even though I won't call him I am hoping that he will get in touch with me....I know this is not a healthy attitude but he to me addiction is an illness, I'm also worry about his depression, his cousin committed suicide, his parents also suffer from depression.
I feel so empty inside,I never thought this could happen to me. I never realized how much drugs can change a person's life...It's so hard to watch someone destroy themselves and there's nothing I can do about it.....
I feel so empty inside,I never thought this could happen to me. I never realized how much drugs can change a person's life...It's so hard to watch someone destroy themselves and there's nothing I can do about it.....