Thank you everyone, for allowing me to beable to read and hear from people whom i can relate with. Like i read earlier tomorrow it will be back to day one, but with some more experience and confidence under my belt it may help or it may just do the job.
I love all of your comments and suggestions.
Thanks for making this board so that I can feel relief in some sence
Good Night, Tasha
You can do it...just think of it as just 24 hours...you can make it...
good luck, and keep busy and positive...
Kerry
good luck, and keep busy and positive...
Kerry
Thank you, and I do think that me finding this message board might really lift my sprits, or at least get me off the couch and on to the computer chair. I will deffiantely be a frequent flyer.
Lots of Love and Luck to everyone
Tasha
Lots of Love and Luck to everyone
Tasha
After so many "day 1's" for me, and I think most people here can relate, it's not that you relapsed, it's that you're back. JUST STAY! (I almost had my own day 1 again and it didn't work out that way, I hope I would have been right back here if it had)
love,
sarah
love,
sarah
Tasha:
You still here?
You still here?
Yep I'm still here. I am just reading everyone elses stories. Relating, reflecting, and crying. I have so may emotions i dont know where one begins and one ends, all i nkow is i am crying, pissed, upset, confused, and angry all of the time and I cant even figure out why letalone stop it
You are FEELING.
We push those down for so long. Just feel baby, feel the way you need to feel and no apologies. I cry at the drop of a hat sometimes, but I also get chills sometimes from the things that move me--how beautiful--how human.
You are how many days? (sorry I said 1 if you're not)--I really realate to the legal probs. can you talk about it?
We push those down for so long. Just feel baby, feel the way you need to feel and no apologies. I cry at the drop of a hat sometimes, but I also get chills sometimes from the things that move me--how beautiful--how human.
You are how many days? (sorry I said 1 if you're not)--I really realate to the legal probs. can you talk about it?
it make me feel better to talk about it. I went through three days of physical hell of withdraws, than the fourth day they slowed down and what did i do another illegal action to get more pills.
If anyone cares here's my story- I am a thryoid cancer survivor, I had Graves Disease, and survived Thryoid Storm.
Thats where the pain meds were introduced to me.
Then I met a dentist that would rx any thing at the drop of a hat, vics, loracets, percs, he once gave me 6 rx's for 30 percs to "hold me off until i could see him again" that was a total of 180 percocets to last me six months- it actually lasted me a few days maybe two weeks. After that stopped I started calling rx to pharmacies acting as the medical assistant. I got away with it almost 100 times. Now the sky is falling down on me. A friend of mine was busted doing the same thing and she rolled over on me so now they are investigating me and have so far come up with four charges of "deception to obtain a dangerous drug" but there will be more if they keep investigating- which i am sure they will. so thats what i am facing. I have court this Monday. I am supposed to be processed and released at the jail- this is my second process and release, and each time it gets harder to do mentally. I get a little more depressed every time a sherriff knocks on my door and i have to grab the baby and run to the bedroom to avoid them arresting me infront of him. THe other day my 2 yr old son heard somebody knocking on the door and turned around and looked at me and said we better go to your room the cops are at the door.---- I cried for hours after that it broke my heart- what have i done to my family over an addiction that i cannot even see my self having???
Thats where the pain meds were introduced to me.
Then I met a dentist that would rx any thing at the drop of a hat, vics, loracets, percs, he once gave me 6 rx's for 30 percs to "hold me off until i could see him again" that was a total of 180 percocets to last me six months- it actually lasted me a few days maybe two weeks. After that stopped I started calling rx to pharmacies acting as the medical assistant. I got away with it almost 100 times. Now the sky is falling down on me. A friend of mine was busted doing the same thing and she rolled over on me so now they are investigating me and have so far come up with four charges of "deception to obtain a dangerous drug" but there will be more if they keep investigating- which i am sure they will. so thats what i am facing. I have court this Monday. I am supposed to be processed and released at the jail- this is my second process and release, and each time it gets harder to do mentally. I get a little more depressed every time a sherriff knocks on my door and i have to grab the baby and run to the bedroom to avoid them arresting me infront of him. THe other day my 2 yr old son heard somebody knocking on the door and turned around and looked at me and said we better go to your room the cops are at the door.---- I cried for hours after that it broke my heart- what have i done to my family over an addiction that i cannot even see my self having???
Okay:
The thing about legal probs. is they can push us to get sober but look so huge and insurmountable that it becomes an excuse to get loaded. Please stay here and watch out for screw it mode--that got me loaded every time. This is something you can overcome--I absolutely promise.
How do you think this will come on? can I help? I've been through a lot if you don't want to disclose personally here...
The thing about legal probs. is they can push us to get sober but look so huge and insurmountable that it becomes an excuse to get loaded. Please stay here and watch out for screw it mode--that got me loaded every time. This is something you can overcome--I absolutely promise.
How do you think this will come on? can I help? I've been through a lot if you don't want to disclose personally here...
Tasha,
You are going thru the 5 stages of grief (you named most of them). The last stage is letting go. For me it was like losing a best friend that I had known and depended on for years..What you are feeling is completely normal. I shed enough tears, it seemed like, to fill a river when I quit pain pills and started on the road to Recovery. Believe me, this too shall pass, and it will all be worth the effort. Just take it one day at a time, cause today is all we really have. NO need to keep one foot stuck in yesterday and another one in tomorrow......you will miss out on today and all of God's miracles.
God Bless,
You are going thru the 5 stages of grief (you named most of them). The last stage is letting go. For me it was like losing a best friend that I had known and depended on for years..What you are feeling is completely normal. I shed enough tears, it seemed like, to fill a river when I quit pain pills and started on the road to Recovery. Believe me, this too shall pass, and it will all be worth the effort. Just take it one day at a time, cause today is all we really have. NO need to keep one foot stuck in yesterday and another one in tomorrow......you will miss out on today and all of God's miracles.
God Bless,
You posted while I did! Hold on..
Alright babe, are you in California?
No I am in Cincinnati Ohio
Have you talked to the doctors or medical offices that you used their names for? I've had tons of friends that have gone thru this...
sounds like this "friend" did it because she is in tons of trouble and probably taught you the ropes of how to cop. This doesn't make you not guilty but it helps a lot -- can you afford an attorney?
I used a lot of doctors, and no I have not spoke to any of them, but she was my friend of 21 years and rolled over on me when the heat came down on her. Every felony I am facing she was in on it the same ammount i was- the deal was i called it in she picked it up and we split the cost and the pills. But the four i am facing I am not involving her name- unlike when she gave them my name in order for her to get probation, me its mandatory jail time or manditory in house recovery treatment- i get real angry about that s***
I have an attorney but he can only do so much with so much
This charge is not as serious as forgery of scripts which is the upside. They really want to make sure that you weren't obtaining the drugs and selling them on the black market.
This charge is bull. It's like trying to convict someone of trying to walk just because they're paralyzed. You have a good chance.
This charge is bull. It's like trying to convict someone of trying to walk just because they're paralyzed. You have a good chance.
Well I have taken my Ambien and I see strange things, and do some very strange things if i dont go directly to bed after taking them so. When I wake up tomorrow morning I will be excited to read what else i can. I love this message board and i thank every one who helps with keeping it up.
good night to all
Lots of Love and Luck
Tasha
good night to all
Lots of Love and Luck
Tasha
