I just got from a speaker meeting and the guy talking reminded me of something I sometimes forget. The drugs were just a symptom of a much larger problem. I am bodily and mentally different than my fellows. Once I ingest just one pill my mind wants more. I can't stop. I have to surrender to my addiction. Ahh, surrender it seems so simple. Today I choose not to use and for me it is a daily reprieve. I am so grateful that I did not pick up a pill today. I do not want to go back to that hell I called my life six months ago. Sometimes I sit in meetings and I don't really get it. Tonight I got it. Maybe because he was cute! Whatever it takes.
Peace,
Rachel
Rachel,
Hi, wasn't gonna post, but, had to say that was probably the best post I've seen here in a long time... Well said.
"Yesterdays History And Tomorrows A Mystery", I'll Stay In Today Too, Today Is All We Can Ask For...."One Foot In Yesterday And The Other Foot In Tomorrow Only Means We're Pissin' All Over Today".......
Take Care...................................God Bless.......................................Bob
Hi, wasn't gonna post, but, had to say that was probably the best post I've seen here in a long time... Well said.
"Yesterdays History And Tomorrows A Mystery", I'll Stay In Today Too, Today Is All We Can Ask For...."One Foot In Yesterday And The Other Foot In Tomorrow Only Means We're Pissin' All Over Today".......
Take Care...................................God Bless.......................................Bob
I love ya' Bob. Nice to see you.
Rach
Rach
Hi Rachel -
That was a great post. How true it is - just one little pill and the maddness begins again. Too bad there's not any good looking guys were I go (A/A). Theyre mostly older men - one really cutie, but found out he's off limite (married). Very nice people though. Thanks for the post. Its always good to be reminded of that.
Love,
Marie
P.S. - Talk about addict dreams - I just woke up (shaking) cause I was dreaming about pills - now I dont remember exactly what happened - funny how it disappears so quickly. Now I cant fall back to sleep!!!
That was a great post. How true it is - just one little pill and the maddness begins again. Too bad there's not any good looking guys were I go (A/A). Theyre mostly older men - one really cutie, but found out he's off limite (married). Very nice people though. Thanks for the post. Its always good to be reminded of that.
Love,
Marie
P.S. - Talk about addict dreams - I just woke up (shaking) cause I was dreaming about pills - now I dont remember exactly what happened - funny how it disappears so quickly. Now I cant fall back to sleep!!!
Hi Marie:
Thanks for the post. I live in Los Angeles, I'm sure it's different everywhere. I know what you mean about those dreams. You wake up with a start thinking okay I didn't use, right? You're like, phew, okay good, no, I didn't use. I hope you are doing well.
Rachel
Thanks for the post. I live in Los Angeles, I'm sure it's different everywhere. I know what you mean about those dreams. You wake up with a start thinking okay I didn't use, right? You're like, phew, okay good, no, I didn't use. I hope you are doing well.
Rachel
Hey Marie, shhhh, don't tell anybody this, okay? But I've noticed they are younger and cuter in NA, and I've been to both. Rachel....kick butt post, needed that today. Hi Bob. Love you guys, Kat
oh p.s. no offense to any cute people in AA, lol.
oh p.s. no offense to any cute people in AA, lol.
Raechel,
I am glad you enjoyed your meeting. Yeah, every now and then I have one of those Aha moments from something said at a meeting. It is usually something I needed to hear at that particular moment. Makes dragging myself out to meetings feel worth while for sure.
I am glad you enjoyed your meeting. Yeah, every now and then I have one of those Aha moments from something said at a meeting. It is usually something I needed to hear at that particular moment. Makes dragging myself out to meetings feel worth while for sure.
KAtt:
What's up, girl?
Rach
What's up, girl?
Rach
OK, Kat, thanks for that info - I'll check it out on Tues (thats the next NA meeting around here). How are you doing - still recovering from all the turkey? I think I gain 5 lbs just in pumpkin pie alone. Recovery and sweets - goes great together, but I'm going to have to start exercising BIG TIME to fit comfortably in my jeans anytime soon!LOL
love,
Marie
Hi Bob - Didnt mean to leave you out - I like that saying - Mine used to be "Today is the tomorrow we worried about yesterday". I never heard yours b4 and like it. Hope all is well with you and Gina!!! Take Care - love ya
love,
Marie
Hi Bob - Didnt mean to leave you out - I like that saying - Mine used to be "Today is the tomorrow we worried about yesterday". I never heard yours b4 and like it. Hope all is well with you and Gina!!! Take Care - love ya
Just me....you know us night owls. When the heck are you going to come into chat? There's only a handful of us who stay up this late. So, have any massive triggers over thanksgiving? OMG...lol. I'm glad I read August's post. At least I've been somewhat prepared for the attack. I've had to fight blaming my addiction on my nutty family since yesterday. Don't worry, I know better....but jeez. It really would explain alot, lol. How did your holiday go? Love ya, Kat
Come on down my way, Marie....whew. When I switched from AA to NA I remember looking around and thinking "wow, I should have done this sooner". There's this one guy with these blue eyes.....okay, I'll stop, but you get the picture. lol . Love ya, Kat
You are a night owl. Where do you chat now? I'll definitely stop on in. I used to blame my crazy family for my problems before but not now. Thankfully, no triggers this holiday thus far. My trigger is when I'm sick and I think I could actually take the pills as prescribed. That's my insanity. I have never taken any pill as prescribed. I have an allergy to pills. People who are allergic to Penicillin don't try to scheme up ways of taking more Penicillin. They accept it, lol!
Rach
Rach
Where are you from Kat? I'm in Central FL. I didnt give NA much of a chance - I dont know, maybe cause I live in a small town - it seemed most of the "kids" were there because they were "court ordered" - I know I need to go - just need a push - so thanks for telling me that - it gives me some encouragement:o)
Marie
BTW - I accepted Sharons invite on the other site. I've never chatted b4 on ANY SITE - Anyhow, maybe we can chat tomorrow - I'm going to try to go back to sleep. Good night Rach and Kat. Hugs to you both. xoxoxox
Marie
BTW - I accepted Sharons invite on the other site. I've never chatted b4 on ANY SITE - Anyhow, maybe we can chat tomorrow - I'm going to try to go back to sleep. Good night Rach and Kat. Hugs to you both. xoxoxox
When I came back from the ego bursting relapse, I started in NA but everyone in NA goes to AA so go figure. There are more AA meetings and they are in nicer areas. BTW, the cute guy was a DR. so I did the old, "Oh, we're in the same industry, I'm a drug rep," bit! LOL. He asked me what drugs I sell and I said, LEVITRA. I do not sell Levitra, I don't know where that came from, lol.
RAch
RAch
Rachel ....recoverybuddies@groups.msn.com, come on in and I'll aprove you. You too Marie. I know what you mean Rachel about the pills. But then, I'm that way about everything. Such an extremist I am. Nothing but nothing in moderation. And Marie, some meetings do seem to have alot of young people, but not all. Half the time in AA I felt like a kid. That sort of had it's own appeal at first, didn't last though. Try hitting a meeting during the early afternoon, kids are in school. Love, Kat
Nite Marie. Sounds like self preservation to me Rachel. If I met a dr I'd run in the opposite direction. I'd have to because where there's a will there's a way and believe me, I'd find a way. My way is to not have a way. It works for me. Funny, what you said about NA/AA is exactly the opposite here. Wierd. It must really vary from state to state or just from city to city. Anyway, check out the site. Love you, Kat
Hey Kat:
I went over to the site but it only took me to the MSN homepage. Maybe I need something else? I dunno.
RAch
I went over to the site but it only took me to the MSN homepage. Maybe I need something else? I dunno.
RAch
Rachel, you are so right. You pegged it on the head. One, and I am off and running. I have no power over my use after that...
And the longer we go, the worse it gets..
I hope you had a nice Thanksgiving...
peace back at cha..
kerry
And the longer we go, the worse it gets..
I hope you had a nice Thanksgiving...
peace back at cha..
kerry
Hi Rachel --
I know what you mean....even though I've gone to a lot of meetings over the course of years and heard many of the same things recounted repeatedly, there are moments when I still hear it like for the first time,,,same with passages from the Big Book. What I think I understand intellectually, and what I own or take to heart because of personal experience, are two different things I guess.
Reminds me of the story I heard once in a meeting, where a newcomer tells an old-timer in the fellowship that he doesn't want to be "brainwashed" by the AA program or some true believer. The oldtimer nods knowingly, suggests that he keep coming back....and that maybe his brain could use a little washing.
My brain needs a washing every day. lol
I know what you mean....even though I've gone to a lot of meetings over the course of years and heard many of the same things recounted repeatedly, there are moments when I still hear it like for the first time,,,same with passages from the Big Book. What I think I understand intellectually, and what I own or take to heart because of personal experience, are two different things I guess.
Reminds me of the story I heard once in a meeting, where a newcomer tells an old-timer in the fellowship that he doesn't want to be "brainwashed" by the AA program or some true believer. The oldtimer nods knowingly, suggests that he keep coming back....and that maybe his brain could use a little washing.
My brain needs a washing every day. lol
Hey None - you are too funny!!!! Yeah, I'm with you - my brain needs to be SCRUBBED :o) LOL
Love,
Marie
Love,
Marie
