Well today I only took a half a pill, and tommorow the other half and then it is over I hope..... I know you guys probably think it is funny that I am this scared when I am down to only a half a pill a day but I am.. I also feel so bad that I got in this situation I mean I am a grandmother of 5, You would think I would have learned something by this time in my life, but no not me, I still do not have any control of my life at my age.. now is that not pathetic.....I am scared of Thursday but I am trying. I want to be better. I dont want to take these pills any more, well maybe I do want to take them, but I am not going to take them .. ok ok I dont want to take them, I just think that I do. I thought today, and this is a pretty crazy thought, what if I dont feel better when they are completly out of my system? What if I feel worse, I guess I will never know until I reach that point. But I think then the hard part will start.. The mental cravings I am thinking of looking in to na/aa I think my sister will go with me, she went thru this also, hers was alot worse and even though she has been clean for a few years she still craves them sometimes. I know I am rambling again, but I just have to get all this off my mind. My husband cant understand all this he is a alcoholic he quit 10 years ago with no problem and he thinks I should be able to do the same.. But I cant seem to do it that easy.. Oh well I am glad this board is here and that you guys are compassionate people. It really helps to get all these feelings off my mind. Thanks for listening
You are taking a half pill of what? Are you still taking pills or are you almost done detoxing and down to half a pill?
Either way you will make it! It won't be easy but you will be able to do it if you have a plan.
Either way you will make it! It won't be easy but you will be able to do it if you have a plan.
trying, the love/hate thing with the pills is normal....even at your wise age...lol....
opiates are sneaky little things.
You have to fill the space with something else...support, an old hobby...
but it is possible, and you can do it...
I am down, but am starting to get a glimmer of hope again.
One thing I did learn, AGAIN, is that I would rather be clean (and raw...) than numbed out...IT JUST DOESN'T WORK LIKE IT USED TO...
the chilis say it best....
"once you know, you can never go back....."
he he
Kerry
opiates are sneaky little things.
You have to fill the space with something else...support, an old hobby...
but it is possible, and you can do it...
I am down, but am starting to get a glimmer of hope again.
One thing I did learn, AGAIN, is that I would rather be clean (and raw...) than numbed out...IT JUST DOESN'T WORK LIKE IT USED TO...
the chilis say it best....
"once you know, you can never go back....."
he he
Kerry
I am down to half a pill of loratab, which I will take tommorow, unless I cave and take it tonight.
Thanks Kerry, For your kind words. and you to Gottahavefaith.
Trying.......you are going to be fine. If you are able to taper down to 1/2 pill, that is showing tremendous strength, and that strength will get you through the w/d and on to clean living! I was using Norco, and couldn't get down to less than 6-7 a day! See how far you'rve come? I have none been clean a couple of months after a 8 year run. Ofcourse, you were never taking that much to begin with, were you? And if I could quit all of that, so can you! I am 48 and can relate to the age thing. But you know addiction does not descriminate based on age!
Believe in yourself, I do! Take care and keep posting, we will be here for you on Thursday and afterwards!
Thanks Carol, I am on Loratab, I have been on them less than a year mostly 4 to 5 a day. I really want to do this, this time and hope to succede, it is just so hard this little voice in my head keeps talking and talking and talking.. LOL..
Trying........I know that voice all too well. I listened to it for years. Please don't do what I did. Believe it or not, your usage could be a lot worse, and it will be if you don't stop now. Soon 4-5 a day will not be enough. Your use will have to escalate to maintain what you think is "normal". That is how some of us got up to 15-30 pills daily. You probably don't think it could happen to you, but I assure you it could. So, ignore the side of your brain that tells you you want a pill. THe other side is telling you to stop now, and you've been listening to that side by tapering. Keep it up! Us old ladies are really tough and you can beat this demon!!
I am so glad that you realized early on that you had a problem..... Like Carol said, it happens to so many of us - you're taking them for legitimate pain and then one day you wake up and you have to take 15 a day just to survive. The addiction just creeps up on you....
When I quit in September (relapsed since then, but clean now), I cut down over 6 days from about 12-15 a day to 1/2 a day.... And I have to tell you, I STILL felt like crap, even after going down to 1/2 a pill. I didn't really get sick, but I did get really anxious, had insomnia, fatigue, I got electrical jolts all through my body...
It takes 3 days for the pills to completely get out of your system, so days 4-5 will probably be the worst... but you shouldn't really get sick and if you can get over the mental aspect, you should be able to kick this habit in no time at all.
Good luck.
Danielle
When I quit in September (relapsed since then, but clean now), I cut down over 6 days from about 12-15 a day to 1/2 a day.... And I have to tell you, I STILL felt like crap, even after going down to 1/2 a pill. I didn't really get sick, but I did get really anxious, had insomnia, fatigue, I got electrical jolts all through my body...
It takes 3 days for the pills to completely get out of your system, so days 4-5 will probably be the worst... but you shouldn't really get sick and if you can get over the mental aspect, you should be able to kick this habit in no time at all.
Good luck.
Danielle
Hey Danielle..........I have missed talking to you lately but have enjoyed reading your writing. I was sick and not feeling much like talking. I am so happy to hear how well things are going for you! You go girl! It's going to happen this time! How's your week going? Is this week MG?
Trying~ Don't think about tomorrow and your possible "caving" think of how far you have come- not only to decrease... but to decide to take your life back!!!! What an accomplishment! From a non user, but a loved one of an addict- I am so proud of you! Think of how strong you are and how you are going to have a life again! I am sure the supporters in your life are going to rally around you. I am so proud of you! There are so many still using that wish that they had your strength! Don't think about tomorrow- think about today and FRIDAY! One step closer to being YOU again!! Way to go!
Zelina
Zelina
Trying,
Good for you on cutting down so much. If you are strong enough for that, you can do anything. Heck, if you can raise kids and have 5 grandkids, you can do anything! Stay strong, you may feel uncomfortable for a while, but that is normal. Please stick with it. It took over a month for me to feel really good. Of course, I still think about pills, but know how much better my life is now that I am clean. I feel more secure and know that I am being honest with myself, my wife and my kids. Im not hiding things from them. I feel good when I wake up and I am not looking for an immediate fix to get the day started.
It is SO worth the minor discomfort to have freedom and health and vitality. The little voice saying take more is the addiction talking. Ignore it. It means you harm.
Stay strong and know that you have support here.
Peace.
Good for you on cutting down so much. If you are strong enough for that, you can do anything. Heck, if you can raise kids and have 5 grandkids, you can do anything! Stay strong, you may feel uncomfortable for a while, but that is normal. Please stick with it. It took over a month for me to feel really good. Of course, I still think about pills, but know how much better my life is now that I am clean. I feel more secure and know that I am being honest with myself, my wife and my kids. Im not hiding things from them. I feel good when I wake up and I am not looking for an immediate fix to get the day started.
It is SO worth the minor discomfort to have freedom and health and vitality. The little voice saying take more is the addiction talking. Ignore it. It means you harm.
Stay strong and know that you have support here.
Peace.
Thanks to all for all your supports and kind words, Tommorow will be my first day with out the pills keep your fingers crossed..
Good luck to you. I hope it all works out for ya.. It will be hard I know but so worth it. Rae
crossing her fingers....
and just know that you aren't going to feel good...have cravings, and just ride with it..I think it is harder to "try to feel good" when you just aren't going to...
good luck...
kerry
and just know that you aren't going to feel good...have cravings, and just ride with it..I think it is harder to "try to feel good" when you just aren't going to...
good luck...
kerry
