I just found out that my husband has been addicted to pain killers for 3 years and within the last 8 months, his addiction spiraled out of control. Im just now finding out that we are behind on a few bills and that he has been spending his paychecks on pills. We owed taxes this year, $5300 to be exact. My mother n law let us borrow the money to pay the IRS instead of building up interest and penalties. She gave my husband the money back in March. I just learned two days ago that he used the $ on pills and to try and keep our bills paid so that I would not find out he was addicted. He told me that she (my mother n law) couldn't let us borrow the money and we would just need to make payment arrangements with the IRS. Now, we owe her $5300 AND the IRS. He didn't come clean about all of this, I investigated until I found all he had been doing...
He promises me that he is now clean and has no intentions of taking pills ever again... He used Tramadol and Phenobarbital to come off of the pills. He is refusing counseling stating that he is clean after two weeks and doesn't need counseling and if I feel like I don't trust him, etc., then Im the one who needs counseling.
I asked him to close his personal checking account and to come back to our joint account and he refuses telling me that He'll add me to his personal but he is not coming back to our original account and that he will not be a prisoner in his own home or have me watching over him. Also says the he is not giving me full control of our bills because he works for his money and should have anytime access to it.
I don't know what to make of all of this...Im so new to this. Please help me. Thank you.
Hey CGU,
Be careful.
People with pill problems who misallocate $5300, and, who don't want their financial trail to be followed, are most often up to no good.
He is right in that he is an adult and can handle his own finances, at least in theory. But it doesn't seem to be truth or reality.
A tough spot you're in.
But, until he's shown you a track record of being clean and responsible, what else do you have to go on? That would be my starting point.
All the best!!
Be careful.
People with pill problems who misallocate $5300, and, who don't want their financial trail to be followed, are most often up to no good.
He is right in that he is an adult and can handle his own finances, at least in theory. But it doesn't seem to be truth or reality.
A tough spot you're in.
But, until he's shown you a track record of being clean and responsible, what else do you have to go on? That would be my starting point.
All the best!!
