Hey Jodygirl:
If someone is telling you "If you tell me the truth about something I disagree with...then I am gone"...they are emotionally blackmailing you. That is a whole other issue! LOL. Sorry, it isn't funny....but I see what you mean by there are instances where someone will not allow honesty.
I had a similar situation in my first marriage. It got so freakin complicated and twisted and ugly...and the damn thing didn't last anyway. I didn't know what I wanted when I got out of that deal, but I knew I didn't want what I had.
Second time around.....new rules. We agreed on honesty from the getgo. Of course, I wouldn't have had it any other way. My motto is if you cannot handle my truth, then you cannot handle me. I am my truth. The good, the bad and the ugly.
At the risk of sounding "know it ally" which I hate! but, you know, you speak of "risking losing it all"...yet if what you "have" is based on a bunch of lies, you really don't have anything...do you? I mean, lies are illusions...illusions are smoke and mirrors, parlor tricks, bunnies out of hats.....In the end, for me, my "full of lies" past life wasn't really that much to lose after all. Now, I preface this with the BIG statement of...I had no children, and was not affecting anyone except the two adults in the marriage. I think that made a big difference. Women especially have to deal with many things to protect their children, and because I have never had any, I wouldn't pretend to have walked a mile in anyone's shoes who has. So, please take my situation with a grain of salt. All mother's have my total respect.
I know one thing for sure....Honest is so much simpler. Wow, it is such a load off a heavy heart to just be able to tell the truth.
I hope you are well Jody girl.....Much love to you.
Sarah
Chris,
I am wondering why your Dr has you taking xanax for an extended period, rather than trying an SSRI Anti-depressant to treat your anxiety. I know a lot of people that take benzos while they are waiting for the other meds to kick in, but using xanax as a first line treatment is pretty much an outmoded therapy (see below).
The trouble with xanax is that it has a short half-life and your body comes to rely on it very quickly. The withdrawal syndrome from benzos is nasty and can be life threatening.
Clearly you have to treat anxiety (whether it is GAD, OCD, or Social Phobia etc) but make sure you are well researched on xanax. I highly recommend the Ashton Manual, which I have linked for you.
Best wishes.
The Ashton Manual
_________________
Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors (SRIs). SRIs, such as Prozac (fluoxetine), Cipramil (citalopram), Aropax (paroxetine), and Zoloft (sertraline), are best known for treating depression, but they're also used to treat anxiety disorders. Many doctors believe they may be the best choice, especially in people who are also suffering from depression.
Benzodiazepines . Benzodiazepines such as Euhypnos or Normison (Temazepam), Valium (Diazepam), Serepax (Oxazepam), and Xanax (Alprazolam) are often used for generalised anxiety disorder and sometimes for panic disorder and social phobia. They have the advantage of working quickly. But they shouldn't be continued in the long term because of the risk of dependence and withdrawal symptoms when they're stopped. Benzodiazepines are best used in short courses of two to four weeks. The main side effect is drowsiness.
Beta blockers . Beta blockers (such as propranolol, atenolol, nadolol, pindolol and labetolol) reduce blood pressure and slow the heartbeat. They are used mainly to reduce certain anxiety symptoms like palpitations, sweating and tremors, and to control anxiety in public situations. They often are prescribed for individuals with social phobia.
Tricyclics . Examples include Tofranil (imipramine), Pertofran (desipramine), and Deptran (doxepin). These drugs were first used for treating depression, but some are also effective in blocking panic attacks. Most tricyclics may also reduce symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and some are effective against obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) They generally take two or three weeks to take effect. Side effects include weight gain, drowsiness, dry mouth, dizziness and impaired sexual function.
I am wondering why your Dr has you taking xanax for an extended period, rather than trying an SSRI Anti-depressant to treat your anxiety. I know a lot of people that take benzos while they are waiting for the other meds to kick in, but using xanax as a first line treatment is pretty much an outmoded therapy (see below).
The trouble with xanax is that it has a short half-life and your body comes to rely on it very quickly. The withdrawal syndrome from benzos is nasty and can be life threatening.
Clearly you have to treat anxiety (whether it is GAD, OCD, or Social Phobia etc) but make sure you are well researched on xanax. I highly recommend the Ashton Manual, which I have linked for you.
Best wishes.
The Ashton Manual
_________________
Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors (SRIs). SRIs, such as Prozac (fluoxetine), Cipramil (citalopram), Aropax (paroxetine), and Zoloft (sertraline), are best known for treating depression, but they're also used to treat anxiety disorders. Many doctors believe they may be the best choice, especially in people who are also suffering from depression.
Benzodiazepines . Benzodiazepines such as Euhypnos or Normison (Temazepam), Valium (Diazepam), Serepax (Oxazepam), and Xanax (Alprazolam) are often used for generalised anxiety disorder and sometimes for panic disorder and social phobia. They have the advantage of working quickly. But they shouldn't be continued in the long term because of the risk of dependence and withdrawal symptoms when they're stopped. Benzodiazepines are best used in short courses of two to four weeks. The main side effect is drowsiness.
Beta blockers . Beta blockers (such as propranolol, atenolol, nadolol, pindolol and labetolol) reduce blood pressure and slow the heartbeat. They are used mainly to reduce certain anxiety symptoms like palpitations, sweating and tremors, and to control anxiety in public situations. They often are prescribed for individuals with social phobia.
Tricyclics . Examples include Tofranil (imipramine), Pertofran (desipramine), and Deptran (doxepin). These drugs were first used for treating depression, but some are also effective in blocking panic attacks. Most tricyclics may also reduce symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and some are effective against obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) They generally take two or three weeks to take effect. Side effects include weight gain, drowsiness, dry mouth, dizziness and impaired sexual function.
Good advice SP
Chris, read the ashton manual and explore the site in general.
Chris, read the ashton manual and explore the site in general.
Hello Chris,
When you post people are going to answer you. Some things you're going to like and some things are going to hit you the wrong way. Some things you are going to agree with some things you wont.
When I first came here over 10 months ago my emotions were raw. I was frightened, alone and ashamed. I was stunned at perfect strangers saying it's ok, here's what I did, here try this, how can I help. People here held my hand when I needed help so desperately.
There were times when people posted to me and I was hurt by it. Sometimes I took offense because what they were saying was true and I didn't want to accept it. Sometimes what was said just hit wrong because of my state of mind. Ignoring people because of what they said is counter productive.
There are times when it is necessary to take a pill, granted. But, there is a but. People here have been through the hell of addiction and have survived it. There are people here who are suffering horribly with addiction and are fighting for their lives at this moment. Posting that you feel good taking a pill is really a slap in the face to all the people who battle this disease every day. That also includes giving advise on how to take suboxone. I know you mean well but you must consider other people.
Danny has experience with "benzos". I'm sure he would trade anything not to have had that experience. His words are to help not to injure. He doesn't want anyone to suffer the way he did. Don't ignore him, listen, you may not agree but always listen.
I really admire you Chris. You are an inspiration to a lot of people. You quit CT and you are attending meetings. You are doing everything in you power to fight this desease and you are winning. Keep your heart and your mind open. You still have a long way to go.
Catherine
When you post people are going to answer you. Some things you're going to like and some things are going to hit you the wrong way. Some things you are going to agree with some things you wont.
When I first came here over 10 months ago my emotions were raw. I was frightened, alone and ashamed. I was stunned at perfect strangers saying it's ok, here's what I did, here try this, how can I help. People here held my hand when I needed help so desperately.
There were times when people posted to me and I was hurt by it. Sometimes I took offense because what they were saying was true and I didn't want to accept it. Sometimes what was said just hit wrong because of my state of mind. Ignoring people because of what they said is counter productive.
There are times when it is necessary to take a pill, granted. But, there is a but. People here have been through the hell of addiction and have survived it. There are people here who are suffering horribly with addiction and are fighting for their lives at this moment. Posting that you feel good taking a pill is really a slap in the face to all the people who battle this disease every day. That also includes giving advise on how to take suboxone. I know you mean well but you must consider other people.
Danny has experience with "benzos". I'm sure he would trade anything not to have had that experience. His words are to help not to injure. He doesn't want anyone to suffer the way he did. Don't ignore him, listen, you may not agree but always listen.
I really admire you Chris. You are an inspiration to a lot of people. You quit CT and you are attending meetings. You are doing everything in you power to fight this desease and you are winning. Keep your heart and your mind open. You still have a long way to go.
Catherine
One more thing.
I took vicodin to get really high. To feel good.
I
take xanax, it's prescribed and have never , NEVER taken more than the prescribed dosage, and yes, both my physiciain and psychiatrist know I'm a recovering vicodin addict.
I'm sick of talking about the xanax isssue, hell I didnt even take one today. Can I end this topic? Sorry Ibrought it up.
And I never said f*** off to you. Do not put words in ones mouth to lower thier rep to raise yours. You know who you are. I'm not responding to this thread anymore. But I will post on my vicodin recovery, which is what I am focused on now.
Chris
I took vicodin to get really high. To feel good.
I
take xanax, it's prescribed and have never , NEVER taken more than the prescribed dosage, and yes, both my physiciain and psychiatrist know I'm a recovering vicodin addict.
I'm sick of talking about the xanax isssue, hell I didnt even take one today. Can I end this topic? Sorry Ibrought it up.
And I never said f*** off to you. Do not put words in ones mouth to lower thier rep to raise yours. You know who you are. I'm not responding to this thread anymore. But I will post on my vicodin recovery, which is what I am focused on now.
Chris
Chris, I never ever abused them either, as everyone here knows. But man, was I addicted to them. And no, you didnt say f*** off. You just said I was a jerk off.
Thank God my "rep" is intact.
Take care.
Thank God my "rep" is intact.
Take care.
Sarah-
You are right.........In a new relationship I see things MUCH differently. In the beginning of my marriage, no secrets were kept and there was not even a thought about it, I told him every detail of my life, There was alot of trust THEN. Before all this happened, I wanted him to know about every detail of my life.
But, no newsflash to most here, my struggle with addiction has changed my marriage forever, not in a good way.. I take responsibility for that too. People Change over time as well, we were very young going into it. So, who knows.
I just have really mixed feelings on this.
But anyone going into a new relationship, I totally agree, All cards must be on the table, or your starting off on a bad foot from the start.
Part of your post reall struck a chord with me, You have a way with words...........Thank you.
I really miss talking to you Sarah, I love your insight.
Hugs girley.
Chris...............
Please, Calm Down if you can..........You are stressing way to much, and I understand why, Your body and mind are going through alot right now.......
Danny means well, I know that. He has been there, and is speaking from direct experience, he just has a sort of "tell it like it is" approach. He really does grow on ya :)
Keep posting, and vent away, but know that all of us here, are here to help as best we can.
Hugs.
You are right.........In a new relationship I see things MUCH differently. In the beginning of my marriage, no secrets were kept and there was not even a thought about it, I told him every detail of my life, There was alot of trust THEN. Before all this happened, I wanted him to know about every detail of my life.
But, no newsflash to most here, my struggle with addiction has changed my marriage forever, not in a good way.. I take responsibility for that too. People Change over time as well, we were very young going into it. So, who knows.
I just have really mixed feelings on this.
But anyone going into a new relationship, I totally agree, All cards must be on the table, or your starting off on a bad foot from the start.
Part of your post reall struck a chord with me, You have a way with words...........Thank you.
I really miss talking to you Sarah, I love your insight.
Hugs girley.
Chris...............
Please, Calm Down if you can..........You are stressing way to much, and I understand why, Your body and mind are going through alot right now.......
Danny means well, I know that. He has been there, and is speaking from direct experience, he just has a sort of "tell it like it is" approach. He really does grow on ya :)
Keep posting, and vent away, but know that all of us here, are here to help as best we can.
Hugs.
Chris...
Why are you being so defensive if you feel you don't have a problem with Xanax? There is natural stuff such as Valerian root, Melatonin, and Passionflower that help with anxiety, much better for you in the long term.
Deirdre
Why are you being so defensive if you feel you don't have a problem with Xanax? There is natural stuff such as Valerian root, Melatonin, and Passionflower that help with anxiety, much better for you in the long term.
Deirdre
Chris,
I can understand your point.
I took xanax. no more than 1mg a day as prescribed for over 2 years. I have generalized anxiety disorder. I am about to ask about klonopin instead...but anyways, I finally stopped taking the xanax...just ran out and didn't refill. I didn't have withdrawl symptoms, and i am very very lucky. Usually even if you take a low dose, the longer you take it the more of a possibility that it isn't going to be fun getting off of. Vicodin and oxy withdrawl are nothing like xanax withdrawls. .. People who have gone through this before are saying what they are because they believe it is doing you a favor.
Good luck with whatever you do and congrats on your detox from your drug of choice.
Stac
I can understand your point.
I took xanax. no more than 1mg a day as prescribed for over 2 years. I have generalized anxiety disorder. I am about to ask about klonopin instead...but anyways, I finally stopped taking the xanax...just ran out and didn't refill. I didn't have withdrawl symptoms, and i am very very lucky. Usually even if you take a low dose, the longer you take it the more of a possibility that it isn't going to be fun getting off of. Vicodin and oxy withdrawl are nothing like xanax withdrawls. .. People who have gone through this before are saying what they are because they believe it is doing you a favor.
Good luck with whatever you do and congrats on your detox from your drug of choice.
Stac
Stac. I take 1mg as well. :) My psychatrist told me I'm lucky, she has clients who take 4mg. - Chris
