I know this is way off topic but I just thought this was funny and thought I would start a Joke Thread. Sometimes it's good to just laugh at silly things. If you have any good ones please post them. Today is a day for laughter!! lololol Endorphines are the best high!!!!
P.S. If anyone is offended by this joke below I apologize. It was only meant in fun.
"MENTAL HEALTH 800 NUMBER"
"Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline.
If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are codependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have multiple personalities, press 3,4,5, and 6.
If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.
If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will transferred to the mother ship.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are manic depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer.
If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the hash key until someone comes on the line.
If you are dyslexic, press 6969696969.
If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's maiden name.
If you have post-traumatic-stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 000.
If you have bipolar disorder, please leave a message after the beep, or before the beep, or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9. If you have short term memory loss, press 9.
If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you."
True story, I was exasperated with one of my students and muttered, "If you dyed your hair another colour, maybe you would get smarter" She looked at me, smiled ever so sweetly and replied, "I'd rather be blonde than grey Sir"!!!
I still laugh when I think of that...
I still laugh when I think of that...
LOL!
So apparently she has hope that, as she ages to grey, she'll learn something!
Too funny.
So apparently she has hope that, as she ages to grey, she'll learn something!
Too funny.
This one is corny but it made me laugh. Everyone have a great day full of laughter!!
Q: What is the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?
A: About 45 Pounds.
Q: And between a husband and a boyfriend?
A: about 45 minutes.
Q: What is the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?
A: About 45 Pounds.
Q: And between a husband and a boyfriend?
A: about 45 minutes.
