What Would You Do If Your Heart Got Broken ?

Pain Pills
1
You all know I am on Sub. and I am very close to getting off
of it. My husband tells me yesterday "I ordered pills online
and they came in" I asked is this going to be used to party
and he said yes. I walked away from the table

I called my sponsor and she set me straight like always
(I don't know what I would do without her) I am the most improntant
person and think about my recovery. She is so right, but
it is so hard.
I AM ASKING PLEASE SOME TELL ME WHAT TO DO !!!
He was addicted to xanax for 3 years and came off by himself.
This is ripping me apart I really don't even know how to feel.....
honestly I am numb.
I FEEL LIKE THOSE PILLS ARE SAYING TO ME "YOU THINK
YOU GOT RID OF ME WELL HA HA I GOT YOUR HUSBAND
NOW"

THIS PAIN IS SO DEEP
2
Also he has told me in the past when he took my pills
"I feel like I am getting addcited to these pills too.
3
Hey Marina,
One day at time....and you first. I really don't know what you should do about him., my old stand by which is a 2x4 to the head comes to mind....but honestly I don't know how he doesn't get it with watching all you are going through...and how hard things are....You are in my prayers and I will talk to you soon....Getting ready to take the baby out for a bit while it is nice.....
But I will be back in alittle.....
Love Yah,
Tina
4
Marina, boy, my heart goes out to you!

My husband is my rock.... if he started having issues with pain pills, I don't know what we would do, because he is the one that I lean on when I am feeling weak.... He is the one that says, "You don't need those" or reminds me that I need to stay sober to be there for him and my son......

Here I am, complaining on other posts about trying to stay clean and having to see all of my coworkers/acquaintances high on drugs.... when these people don't really matter in the grand scheme of things in my life..... yet now you have to deal with trying to stay clean and sober while your husband may be falling into the same trap that you were.....

I'll definitely say a prayer for you and will be here if you need to vent or need advice.....Could you sit down and have a heart-to-heart with him about this? Could you get your doctor or your sponsor to talk to him?
5
Marina, like Tina said right now just worry about yourself, get yourself clean and strong and then you can tackle your husbands problem. Theres no easy answer, after all you've been through it didnt seemt to register to him whats its all about.

Good luck
JohnDee

PS: Hi Danielle Happy New Year
6
Hi Marina well i guess you know how hard it is to admit a problem so like people are saying here take care of you thats what is important right now thenif you feel you can help rescue hubby at least you can tackle it. Stay strong and like i said in my other thread dont let others bring you down no matter who they are. jackie xxx
7


Thank you guys ..........
I have talked to him, he said in a nut shell " it won't be a problem for me"
When he has told me in the past it could be.
It is just so hard to focuse on me, when the other have of my heart
is him.
I am trying I promise that
8
Oh Marina~, my heart goes out to you sweetie!! I am at a loss for words, i would be soooo pissed of and so hurt that i would probablly leave, but thats me... all i can do at this point is offer my love and friendship to you and if you ever need to talk day or nite you have my number use it!! i will keep you in my thoughts and preyers friend always!!, your friend........
9
Marina, I really feel for you. But like John and Tina said, concentrate on yourself first. I know it's hard. Thats what love does. You have recognized your problem and it's great you are working on it. Any chance you can get him to come to the board? He most likely would resist. My wife won't and she has a definite drinking problem. Yet, again last night, she pounded 12 beers and was up to 3:00am. Third night in a row. Yet she "has no problem". 36 beers in 72 hours is kind of a problem. But see if he will come here.
10
Dear Marina, I'm not writing you with answers, just to tell you I can relate....boy can I relate. I got clean a little over four months ago. My husband has not. He's in total denial. In fact, he's in denial over me too. Almost everyday he is a trigger of some kind for me. I have to hear the rattle of a pill bottle in his pocket. Oh and worse, in the very beginning he tried to give them to me. If I dare to mention a headache, there he is offering a pill. I have never had to use such determination in my life. Some days I want to give up. Something in me just hangs in there. Recovery is a selfish thing, so I'm trying to be selfish. I'm trying to remember that this is about me, my life, my recovery, my future. It's very hard. I wish you so much luck!!! If I can support you in any way, I'd be happy to. We're about to leave for the evening but if you'd ever like to email me please feel free to do so. I wish I knew the answer, I could use one too. This is hard enough, but to not have any support at home, that just makes it harder. Hang in there. Much love, Kat
11
Kat- When I quit drinking (and I was not alcoholic) after my wife insisted on it, then I sit there and watch her chug a beer, I just wanted to bang my head on the wall. It felt kinda good when I stopped.....her dog is named Chuggie, if that tells you anything..
12
After another long talk, he ran and got all the pills except 1 (for tonight)and flushed the other
87. I don't know for sure I wasn't there when he did it. I want to believe him.... I just can't not all the way. In a few hours it will be 2005, a new start. I pray with everything in me will be,
that me and my family can have a new start.
13
Tough isn't it Danny? Now imagine her abusing your doc. At times it's a living nightmare. I have the tools to cope though, I just have to work a little harder at it than some. But hey, nothing is impossible! Who knows? Maybe one day both our spouses will do what they need to do too. It's worth praying for.

Good luck marina, it sounds like things might be going your way. Wishing you the best, Kat
14
Marina, stay strong. I don't think that I could be around pills, it would make me really angry if my spouse was taking pills knowing my struggle...
You have to take care of YOUR recovery...
I hope you have a happy new year..and don't cave..the second time is harder..and you have come so far..
Kerry
15
Kat- Now THAT would be tough. Her sister, who I love dearly however, has swiped stuff from me. Goes into the bathroom. Ooops, 20 pills are gone and she is out the door. We hide them now when she comes over.
16
Good morning Marina and all.Sweety I don't think any of us can tell you what to do.But I do think in your heart you know whats right for you and what is not.You can not control your husbands actions but you do control your own and you know how hard you've worked to get where you are.With that said the rest is on you(nothing like pressure huh)Marina please know I will help however I can.Try to stay strong.......mj
17



Wow, talk about triggers. You people are awesome. I have not been tested like that since day 4 in my w/d when my hubby got hurt and came home w/pills. If he did it now ........well, he wouldn't do it now. He knows better. I am so sorry you have to deal with it in your face like that. But, you know what you have to do and I truly hope you can keep doing it.
18
We had several very long talks, and like I said he flushed them.
He feels really bad, but he even said that maybe I stopped
him from going down the same road I did. I hope he and I
can move past this and go back to the way we were before
this happened.