What Would You Like To Share Today?

It could be about anything...what's on your mind? What's bugging you about your recovery? What are you doing right?

Today's a good day for me. I'm meeting my new sponsee for coffee at noon. I'm really excited for her and me.

I'm a little scared though too..it feels like such an awesome responsiblity...like what if I tell her the wrong thing? I know it's not up to me to "fix" her, but I don't want to give her bogus info either. Tread lightly...

If we could keep this thread about recovery that would be great...
Hey Lisa!!!

QUOTE
I'm a little scared though too..it feels like such an awesome responsiblity...like what if I tell her the wrong thing?


LOL...sounds like what I said a few days ago...I remember awhile ago, when I was early in recovery and Miss Katbird would share her ESH and she told me one time, she would never ask one of her sponsees to do something that she had never done herself. That stuck with me, still does to this day so with newcomers, I always shared what works for me, what I do on a daily basis and it's up to them if they want to use it....I also remember that a sponsor is someone that is supposed to take you through the steps, and everything else that comes from the relationship is just an added blessing....

What I do is pray before working with someone and I ask God to lead the way and it usually always works out....

So, my day, is crazy....I'm taking some moments to breathe....My new sponsee called on Wednesday to let me know she couldn't make the meeting as she was too tired but she'd see me Thursday. Didn't show last night and the gal that went to pick her up, said she pulled up to her house and my sponsee was with another newcomer (a guy) and they said they were going to hang out together rather than go to the meeting. ~sigh~

I don't take it personal anymore...Today, I am grateful that I got to see the total insanity of this disease through her and how it so wants us to be unique and do it alone so it can keep us active until it kills us.

Smooches,
Stacey
Thanks for starting this thread. I've needed to share my feelings for a few days now but just haven't been able to express myself. I have a problem with isolating myself every year around this time. After Christmas and before spring. I know it's the absolute worst thing I can do yet I always find myself in this rut. I'm not going to make any excuses because no matter what is going on in my life that's not a reason for me to sit on my butt and do nothing while everyone else is out there contributing to society and living there life. My daughter is almost 12 and while she still needs me, she is also starting to get a life of her own. Now is the time for me to do something. I just don't know what. My husband wants me to work with him in his business but that doesn't bring me any happiness. I need to do something on my own. Hopefully I will find what that is. Thanks for the opportunity to vent. I feel a little better just getting this out. Peace.

Shelly
Vent? Oh goodie! People have been coming into my office for 2 weeks sick. They pass it from one person to the next. I am running out of Lysol. Also my throat is scratchy (not from smoking) and every muscle in my body aches.
On a positive note, a former client brough me some Old Bay Shrimp from one of my favorite little restraunts. MMMMMMMMMM I want more. (I can never remember how to spell restarant)
That's what I need to remember..share ESH. I can only pass on what's worked for me. And you're right, the relationship that follows, hopefully, is just an added blessing. I'm excited to walk her through the steps because that means I get to do them again as well, it's been awhile since I've done that. I know people who do the first 3 every morning. I'm going to suggest that for both of us.

You're right to not take it personal Stacey. I have a hard time with that. I tend to put my heart and soul into something and then get that heart stepped on when things don't happen the way I think they should. Good lesson.

Shelly...you're not giving yourself enough credit. You see what changes you need to make, that's half the battle. When my youngest left the nest, so to speak, I was at a loss as to what to do with my life. I still am in a lot of respects. It's your time now..do things that help you and make you feel good as a person. It almost sounds like you aren't getting enough support?

12 Stepper...lol Yea, right, it's not from smoking.
Today is a good day for me, as I have regained confidences that I trashed. My daughter called me, believes that I am working hard on my recovery, and hears it in my voice. That, for me , is enough as it was chewing me up, looking in the mirror every day knowing how much she distrusted me. It has taken time to regain some of that, not all, but some, and I am grateful. Just for today, I have no intention of breaking that trust, as I know how good it feels to have it, finally.
It has been my wish, everyday, besides staying clean, that she gains respect back for me.

On the other hand, yucky, I have so much housework to do and have been lazy today, talked on the phone waaaaay too long, but, I worked on my recovery with my daughter, so, I don't mind.

And Lisa, how lucky that person you are meeting is, and I hope to find a sponsor like you, someday, she's out there, just have to find her, is all......it is hard to connect sometimes, and I am struggling with that....

Thanks and my best to anyone struggling,
Lucky

Shelly, Just so you know, struggling with my 14 year old, too, and feeling down that she has more than me, now. So you know you aren't alone in that...it's hard when they clip their wings. The right job, will, hopefully, come your way soon. Keep your chin up!
Kat, Enjoy those shrimp and try to stay away from those sick germs.!
Hi Stacey, that is too bad about your sponsoree, sighing with you~
The best way to find a sponsor Lucky is to ask for a temp. one. Every meeting should have a list of women who are willing to do that. I went through a few before I found the right one for me. In the beginning there were quite a few who were the right ones, I just wasn't willing to listen yet. But I worked my way through it and am so blessed with the sponsor I have now, she is truly my friend.

We can't know until we try. You have to be willing to take that leap of faith. The hardest part for me was to have to call and "check" in every day. I hated that! lol I didn't want to talk on the phone! But it got easier as time went on.

Hang in there...that housework will still be waiting for you tomorrow and in a 100 years, no one is going to remember that your house was clean...xxoo
Lisa,
I did get some phone numbers,for a new sponsor, like 6, but, tried to call a couple. I dialed, they didnt answer, chickened out, didn't leave a message, etc. I gave up too easily.
I have a temp. sponsor, she's fabulous, has been in AA for years, even gave talks at my detox. She called me when I got home, just to see how I was, kinda landed in my lap. I have to find someone else though, shes too close to my family relationships.I always felt like I was calling too much, she babysat g-kids+worked. Not a family member, but, knows my extended family, and she had recent serious, sudden, surgery, so, shes been awfully sick, unable to really take care of her, never mind me. I miss her desperately, she put me in perspective and gave me the guts I needed to do the things I didnt want to do.
So I am on the look-out. Problem is, the ones at the meeting I go to,connect with, don't have over a year, but, I have the #'s of the ones that do, and I can try them again, and not be a baby, lol.....I know I can find someone, I just have to stop being so damn picky....And you are right, the house will not matter then, my family will....
Thanks, again
Lucky
Lucky
If you don't want to ask over the phone you could always approach someone after a meeting <BEG> You don't have to "connect" with someone. You need someone to take you thru the steps. I was sooo intimidated by my sponsor in the beginning. I asked her to sponsor me and she told me to call her that night. No way, Jose! Call on the phone? You've got to be kidding, right? So I suffered for 3 more months and 3 more sponsors before I asked her again and finally DID call her. I've been grateful ever since. Oh yeah, she doesn't intimidate me any more.
QUOTE

I asked her to sponsor me and she told me to call her that night. No way, Jose! Call on the phone? You've got to be kidding, right?


ROTFLMAO.....You still hate talking on the phone...LOL

To be honest, Lucky, I ,too, was so fearful asking someone to sponsor me that I prayed and prayed and then just did it knowing it was something I had to do, didn't have to like it, just do it....oh, and my BFF, 12stepper intimidated the hell out of me and when she suggested things like "get a sponsor" or "get a new sponsor", I had enough fear of her to just do it....

You'll be fine, honey....pray and ask for the guidance, stay open and your prayers will be answered...

Take care,
Stacey
But I LOVE texting. Too bad my sponsor hasn't figured out how to do it yet, She is so 1990s. Or 70s.
Ok Lucky..you've vented, now it's time for action. Just do it honey. Make yourself a promise, that at your next meeting you will approach at least one person, tell them you're looking for a sponsor and can they help you? They won't bite, I promise.

Ok..I'm off, wish me luck!
QUOTE
But I LOVE texting.


~sigh~ Me, too....And I do believe, in a few years, we'll be sitting in a TA meeting sharing how unmanageable our lives had become in the texting era...

My peeps I work with, everytime they hear my phone chirp, they know it's you...

Smooches,
Stacey

Hey, can you text without looking yet? How about texting while driving, do you do that?
Hey It took me months to be brave enough to smoke and drive at the same time. Don't be smart with me, missy.
Oh Girls,
I know, there are a couple of muscle hunks there, but, hubby would freak on me if I talked to a guy as much as I did to D******, lol. He hated how much I talked to her, when she was healthy, she reminded me of you guys, its funny, thats why I like reading you all and your posts as you are her (without the hospital bed, of course!)
I know they won't bite ,but, there is a reason why, this one lady I want to ask, but, its NA, I really am ashamed at why I haven't asked her.. Perhaps soon, if I figure a way around it. She would be my sponsor, but, she doesn't know I know her. From when she used, she has 4 gotten me, socially....but, we will meet again, publicly, when the weather here is better, in a group setting totally outside of the NA world. And I am afraid of being known as a member of NA, in this place, not for me, Id tell everyone, but I dont want my kids to be involved, at all. Its hard to explain publicly, but, I'll take that jump again.
I guess I have to move on....find another mother~lol......
yea, I texted Stacey saying I suck at texting and she wrote back QUICK with a "WHO IS THIS??" ... It took me 10min to write back.. I'm so slow. Really Stacey, give me some pointers sometime... why does it start spelling out it's own funky and may I add WRONG words when I try to type?? GEEZ!

I have a whole hell of a lot to share ... things in my neck of the woods seem to be nose diving, but I'll wait. I need to get my s*** straight, really.

Stac
Ok~ Thanks Ladies
I will go to a meeting and ask during the break~maybe~smoking, can I borrow your light, and oh, be my sponsor pleeeeeaaaase, mine is deathly sick, plus she was only a temp.,lol.

Seriously, I will, I really need someone to start helping me with the steps. Temp sponsor didn't go there with me, she knew I was struggling with other matters, thats why it should be someone outside of my life, as people who are near or know of it, know things about the people near me, that blurs things. It cant remain geared towards my recovery, its hard to explain...

But, I can find someone, just have to go thru sponsors like jeans, til I find the right fit, right??
Feel better, Stacey, whatsup kiddo? Not like you to be nose diving???
Lisa, I am sure it went great, you are gonna fit fine..& fingers crossed &
XoXO Lucky
Hey Stacey,

QUOTE
why does it start spelling out it's own funky and may I add WRONG words when I try to type?? GEEZ!


A lot of phones are set up with the Texting defaulting to T9, which is where it makes words for you (and p*sses me the freak off) when you put a couple letters in...in your texting setup, you should be able to set it to regular (alpha)where you type the words and that's what you get...

Oh, and you don't suck, you did just fine....Hang out with us old ladies for a bit and you'll get to be a PRO...

Love ya,
Stacey
Who's an old lady?
What is ESH?