I want to word that differently. I will only speak of myself. Why do I get so angry on this board, the board that helped me get away from Lortabs, changing my life for the better and yet sometimes I feel provoked and I jump back. If they are provoking me, why don't I just ignore them? Why do I feel I need to defend others when they have told me specifally that they can handle themselves?
Is it the addiction? I'm just not one to want to blame my bad actions on one thing but so many of you are really smart people and I would love to know what you think. I don't like feeling this way and yet I love the way I feel when I post to a new person.
I know I'm clean for now but I am still scared to death that I may relapse, mostly since I hurt daily, not chronic all of the time. Last night I didn't get to sleep until 4 this morning and then woke up at a little after 9 and had to be at Mortuary at 11:00. I didn't set the clock b/c if I do sleep when in bad pain, it's never more than a couple of hours. I was lucky this morning and got more sleep and still made it to my cousin's service on time.
These are like wars, not even mini wars and I don't like myself when I'm a part of them. The board is divided and I take my part of the blame du to some of my post. It didn't seem this way when I started, it seems the last month has been really bad and I started on May 31st.
I'm trying not to write a book, I am aware that some don't like that and will not read, just skip over. I think this is important if we want our board back and want to continue getting help and helping others.
Any answers? Is it b/c we are active or non-active addicts? I have been an addict longer than this but have not had this board as an outlet.
Pls any suggestions, answers, opinions are greataly appreaciated.
MJ, you did a wonderful thing today with your post. You brought it to everyone's attention and asked us to just stop.
Thank you for that.
I promise I am not like some of the post I have made. I'm easy-going, I have been told, sometimes too much so, but I have always said that it's better to choose my battles and I'm not always doing that on this board. Another fella told me the same thing. He seemed mean and when we posted to each other a few times, I know that he is just a teddy bear to his wife and children.
I thought of that and it made me think that it may not be just me who feels the need to "jump in" It may be that we are so different than some of the post we make.
I just rememeber "fun threads" now they may start that way and end badly.
Thank you for listening.
Love, Jean
I always have nightmares about being caught inside the addiction board in the middle of a flame war, and theres cowgirl on one side and terrianne on the other and they're throwing huge fireballs and then an army of us other guys attempting to overcome them. It was like the lord of the rings except after a few minutes I lost interest and my dream switched to laying on the beach with Carmen Electra
What made us turn to drugs in the first place? some of us in physical pain, some in psychic pain...some out of boredom....Jean, I think the addict has mad issues and not using is only the fist step..we all need to step back from time to time and check our intentions and motives. Being the quintessential Libra, I get angry when I see people being treated unfairly.....Love, S....You've got mail
Jean I think that what ever had us to turn to pills has to be dealt with.. I feel like there is always a underlying reason for our drug addiction .. I know some people start taking them for pain but why did they end up abusing them... To me also suffering with your pain has to be hard, I know my husband is disabled and has alot of pain and when he hurts he is angry and ill all the time.. And then the guilt sometimes for me about my addiction and feeling ashamed of the things I did to get the pills etc.. Comes out as anger also... JMHO>>> love ya...
Hey Jean, what board is it you want back? This board has never been any different that I've seen. In fact, it's been worse.
What will change is your perception of it.
You will find what amuses or appeals to you and ignore the rest. When you see something that has nothing to do with you, you won't feel compelled to be involved.
You will gain patience for your fellow poster because you know that everyone is in different stages of recovery and personal growth.
You will find that the personal friends you have made as a result of this board are nothing less than fate and benefit you more than a post here ever could.
We are all goofs when we come here, some worse than others, lol, but all goofs. Then over time we work on ourselves, discover what and who is important, who will sit up with us all night when we're having a bad time, who we worry over, who shows us their heart and who we show ours.
You may not just adore every person on this board and that's fine. Why should you?
However, you will learn to respect all and either be pleasant or silent when in doubt.
This is the process of growth.
Love, Kat
What will change is your perception of it.
You will find what amuses or appeals to you and ignore the rest. When you see something that has nothing to do with you, you won't feel compelled to be involved.
You will gain patience for your fellow poster because you know that everyone is in different stages of recovery and personal growth.
You will find that the personal friends you have made as a result of this board are nothing less than fate and benefit you more than a post here ever could.
We are all goofs when we come here, some worse than others, lol, but all goofs. Then over time we work on ourselves, discover what and who is important, who will sit up with us all night when we're having a bad time, who we worry over, who shows us their heart and who we show ours.
You may not just adore every person on this board and that's fine. Why should you?
However, you will learn to respect all and either be pleasant or silent when in doubt.
This is the process of growth.
Love, Kat
Wonderful post Kat! Thanks for putting reality in black and white.
Jean,
I think part of it's the holidays coming up. I was talking to my therapist friend about his clients going reliably nuts right before Thanksgiving. He said he thought a large component was the stress of family reunions (or memories thereof) amplifying every single insecurity we have. We feel insecure, then shamed, defensive and angry.
JD,
My 13 year old told me about a saying they have on their gamers' forum re: flame wars. "Winning a flame war is like winning the Special Olympics. Either way you're still retarded." LOL (But I had a little talk with him about how that wasn't a nice thing to say about the mentally-handicapped.)
Sharonn, I'm Pisces.
Love, Gina
I think part of it's the holidays coming up. I was talking to my therapist friend about his clients going reliably nuts right before Thanksgiving. He said he thought a large component was the stress of family reunions (or memories thereof) amplifying every single insecurity we have. We feel insecure, then shamed, defensive and angry.
JD,
My 13 year old told me about a saying they have on their gamers' forum re: flame wars. "Winning a flame war is like winning the Special Olympics. Either way you're still retarded." LOL (But I had a little talk with him about how that wasn't a nice thing to say about the mentally-handicapped.)
Sharonn, I'm Pisces.
Love, Gina
As usual Kat kind of nails it right on.
Nice post Kat.
Jeff
Nice post Kat.
Jeff
Jean,
Just a comment here, but I thought you were going to quit writing such long posts. I do enjoy what you say in short ones but when I see long ones from you I just skip over them. I wonder how many others do the same thing. I have to say though I do that with anyone who writes novels.......not just you Jean, so don't take it personally.
Sharon
Just a comment here, but I thought you were going to quit writing such long posts. I do enjoy what you say in short ones but when I see long ones from you I just skip over them. I wonder how many others do the same thing. I have to say though I do that with anyone who writes novels.......not just you Jean, so don't take it personally.
Sharon
Kysharon,
I don't mind Jean's emails, but I have to admit, I do skip over the ones with poor spelling, grammar, and an absence of paragraphs or punctuation.
BTW. And ellipses... LMAO. I hate ellipses
I don't mind Jean's emails, but I have to admit, I do skip over the ones with poor spelling, grammar, and an absence of paragraphs or punctuation.
BTW. And ellipses... LMAO. I hate ellipses
Sharon i here ya hun i also skip long posts maybe my impatients, im sure lots of people do maybe that could account for some of the mixed up accusations.
ANYWAY WHY ARE WE SO BLOODY ANGRY lol no idea hun im always happy and polite for instance i always say Pi,,off please lol jaxxxxxxx
ANYWAY WHY ARE WE SO BLOODY ANGRY lol no idea hun im always happy and polite for instance i always say Pi,,off please lol jaxxxxxxx
what is an ellipse? can't remember my grammar lessons today, just curious.
Hey Kat,
Again you cut cleanly and smoothly to the truth of the matter, letting some of us learn a lesson the painless way!! Love you girl! Beck
Again you cut cleanly and smoothly to the truth of the matter, letting some of us learn a lesson the painless way!! Love you girl! Beck
Hi Jean,
You can't please all of the people all of the time!!!!
This is a quote for the Al a nons book..........
" There is danger in taking on anothers duty-danger that we may neglect our own, and that we may deprive them of what they may learn from finding their own solutions."
We are a support group not a problem solving group, all I can do is guide someone but the rest is up to them. Everyone is entitled to have there own opinion, we can all agree to disagree.....All my Love..Shel
You can't please all of the people all of the time!!!!
This is a quote for the Al a nons book..........
" There is danger in taking on anothers duty-danger that we may neglect our own, and that we may deprive them of what they may learn from finding their own solutions."
We are a support group not a problem solving group, all I can do is guide someone but the rest is up to them. Everyone is entitled to have there own opinion, we can all agree to disagree.....All my Love..Shel
Gina,
I hear ya gf, I'm the same way especially if its all the time. Hope you and your family is well. Thanks for your post about baby Jackson on RB. It might just be me but he gets cuter everyday.
Jackie,
Guess I am not the only one who does that. You are always nice and I love your posts because they are always relevant and to the point. How are you? BTW, You can tell me to p/o anytime you want to, lol.
Best wishes to both of you,
Sharon
I hear ya gf, I'm the same way especially if its all the time. Hope you and your family is well. Thanks for your post about baby Jackson on RB. It might just be me but he gets cuter everyday.
Jackie,
Guess I am not the only one who does that. You are always nice and I love your posts because they are always relevant and to the point. How are you? BTW, You can tell me to p/o anytime you want to, lol.
Best wishes to both of you,
Sharon
johndee,
if karmen elektra was in that dream you can bet your sweet cheeks i wasnt in no flame war with cowgirl, i was getting busy with dave navaro, so you could have your time with karmen : )
terrianne
if karmen elektra was in that dream you can bet your sweet cheeks i wasnt in no flame war with cowgirl, i was getting busy with dave navaro, so you could have your time with karmen : )
terrianne
LOL JD. That's funny. But Karman Electra? Ew.
What this board needs to get back to is posts about recovery..the rest will follow.
Cowgirl
What this board needs to get back to is posts about recovery..the rest will follow.
Cowgirl
hello,
I guess i will put my two cents in this .Just what i see .I see people being mean to other and we are all here for the same reson .So i thought anyways.I know alot have friendship here.So,these are the one to sit back see who says what so will be on the same page,then they will say what the other have said.Or right on!!!I didnt like the post of people here with bad spelling and so on.I dont know how to spell everything but, everyone can firgure it out.Im not perfect and if you think you are then why ant (ant ant i word )why havent you firgure out a way for us all to recover and not suffer?If you dont like my spelling its not why im here im here to learn and share my expericence with other.i do see jean has been attacked alot here lately.I dont know her or have not talked with her.i see when she posted usally a bad post will come to her an a attack.i dont know if others are trying to run her off or what it is.Tell her not to write a journal.LMAO!!!Anyways attack me pick at me for my spelling i dont give a rats a**.Everyone in recovery with cold trukey and some are not doing so great .They need that extra incourgment.Uh oh i need to get my dictionairy out to firgure that word out/. If you cant figure out or not like my spelling then dont read it.I took this to heart because there was someone with bad spelling and i havent seen them lately .They were made fun of. and its not funny ...Jean, dont leave the board just take it one day at a time.Dont respond to the post that will start something on here.I see alot i want to post back when i read and i leave it alone.it only add fuel to the fire.When your already hot ..........Take care,crystal
I guess i will put my two cents in this .Just what i see .I see people being mean to other and we are all here for the same reson .So i thought anyways.I know alot have friendship here.So,these are the one to sit back see who says what so will be on the same page,then they will say what the other have said.Or right on!!!I didnt like the post of people here with bad spelling and so on.I dont know how to spell everything but, everyone can firgure it out.Im not perfect and if you think you are then why ant (ant ant i word )why havent you firgure out a way for us all to recover and not suffer?If you dont like my spelling its not why im here im here to learn and share my expericence with other.i do see jean has been attacked alot here lately.I dont know her or have not talked with her.i see when she posted usally a bad post will come to her an a attack.i dont know if others are trying to run her off or what it is.Tell her not to write a journal.LMAO!!!Anyways attack me pick at me for my spelling i dont give a rats a**.Everyone in recovery with cold trukey and some are not doing so great .They need that extra incourgment.Uh oh i need to get my dictionairy out to firgure that word out/. If you cant figure out or not like my spelling then dont read it.I took this to heart because there was someone with bad spelling and i havent seen them lately .They were made fun of. and its not funny ...Jean, dont leave the board just take it one day at a time.Dont respond to the post that will start something on here.I see alot i want to post back when i read and i leave it alone.it only add fuel to the fire.When your already hot ..........Take care,crystal
Don't take it personally, Crystal. Everybody has their little pet peeves but it really didn't have anything to do with you, I'm sure.
Now take Gina for instance.....this is one of her......pet peeves. She finds this....very distressing. She would prefer......that I did not do this.....however.....when she reads this.......she will laugh. Gina.....I will talk to you.....soon. Lol, love, Kat
Now take Gina for instance.....this is one of her......pet peeves. She finds this....very distressing. She would prefer......that I did not do this.....however.....when she reads this.......she will laugh. Gina.....I will talk to you.....soon. Lol, love, Kat
oh ...... i thought an ellipse was something like a .... a .... a.... well an eclipse, not like the car .... but more like .... you know .... the moon and stars!
i don' think thinkof grammerall the time either. .... esp when i am in a hurry .... orjust plain tired. sometimes my keyboard doesn't hit the space bar. maybe they will have spell check one day here. this ......ing thing is making me nutso!
lol.
just kidding gina,
love,
pm
i don' think thinkof grammerall the time either. .... esp when i am in a hurry .... orjust plain tired. sometimes my keyboard doesn't hit the space bar. maybe they will have spell check one day here. this ......ing thing is making me nutso!
lol.
just kidding gina,
love,
pm
