I can't understand why my man will stay off the gear for 8 or 9 days doing Meth and then go back to the dope once the Meth he gets is gone. Isn't the Meth supposed to help? I asked him why he doesn't stay on the Meth longer and he says then he will be dependent on THAT. he says it's like kicking one demon to the curb and picking up another bad habit. I don't get it. At least on the Meth he's not nodding out while I am talking to him or while we are eating dinner. I hate when he looks like "Night of the Living Dead". The dope is making him look old, tired and run down. I hate to keep asking myslef, "What the F**K is it going to take for him to STOP??"
Hey Danie.......I'm sorry you are worrying and sounds like getting fed the heck up....."What Will It Take To Get Him To Stop"??????????
That's the big question, and it's on HIM.......Danie that's his choice.....nothing you personally can do to MAKE him STOP.....read post over on Familes/Friends on the Board here and maybe that will help.
I'm not on methadone so I can't answer that, but sounds like the addict lie. The best lie of all......the one we tell ourselves......yeah, one habit over another and back and forth......many people have good lives on methadone.....he has to want it though, Dani.
That's the big question, and it's on HIM.......Danie that's his choice.....nothing you personally can do to MAKE him STOP.....read post over on Familes/Friends on the Board here and maybe that will help.
I'm not on methadone so I can't answer that, but sounds like the addict lie. The best lie of all......the one we tell ourselves......yeah, one habit over another and back and forth......many people have good lives on methadone.....he has to want it though, Dani.
My partner is supposed to be using meth but I think he is still using the gear. There is the same tell tale signs and coments like how scared he is to actually use the meth cos its supposed to be worse to come off than heroin?? I think my partner is just taking advantage of the fact that he is seing a councilor next week and they are going to try to get him on subitex so he is making the most of the gear until then?? Am so messed up with all this cos I find it so hard to understand???
Im late for work- look for my response on this topic tonight. Unfortunetly ,I know way to much about about the mdone to heroin( & visa vera )thing
jack
jack
I know what you mean. I substitute one drug for another, but it is all the same. even when the drug i switch to is exercise. i still obsess and over exercise to a point that it is a detriment to my life. So the only time that i make real progress is when i confront my addictive personality in general. and that is the biggest challenge of all. so your man is just switching not really dealing. which isn't all bad because some drugs or outlets are healthier than others. but it takes a lot of courage and even more strength to confront the beast within. and only he can go there. it is a lonely journey. but rewarding. somthing he will have to do without you. and all you can do is draw on every ounce of compassion and selfless love you have within you. and to do that you have to let go of empathy. in other words you can care for him and support him on this path but you can't let yourself try to feel what he is going through. or tink of what you would do if you were in his shoes. that kind of thought just hurts you and him. good luck with this, the hardest challenge on earth, and keep your head up. don't have expectations just praise progress. and be thankfull for the things you learn along the way.
strength and power!!
strength and power!!
M done will take away the sickness. However, you have to work on the cravings. I know I still missed the rush of the needle,so after I was on m done I still tried to get high for awhile. I finally realized that it takes a big amount of good dope to get through the m done.- - It isn't worth it - -
Remember being a heroin addict is a full time job. Just drinking your mdone & going about your normal day is a new kind of day for a active addict
keep in touch
jack
Remember being a heroin addict is a full time job. Just drinking your mdone & going about your normal day is a new kind of day for a active addict
keep in touch
jack
Hi Danie, basically meth makes you feel "normal" (after a fashion...) but heroin gets you high. When you take meth, it takes an hour or two to make you feel OK, but heroin is instant. They just don't feel the same. Meth takes away the sickness but it doesn't do for you what heroin does. The thing that people who don't use heroin can't grasp is that it feels amazing. The first time I did smack I thought I'd died and gone to heaven, and it's THAT feeling that every junkie is chasing. When he's nodding out and in a mess, he's away with the fairies. He's "in the zone" - he's at the place that every junkie is wanting to be.
As for what will it take for him to stop. Well, he has to get to the point where the pursuit of that feeling has robbed him of everything else, and that very likely includes you. I feel for ya, being in a relationship with an addict, coz there's nothing you can do to help him, except leave. Unless addicts are left to deal with the consequences of their actions, instead of being given chance after chance by their loved ones, there's not a snowballs chance in hell that they are gonna sort their act out. So my advice to you is the same as i give everyone who's in a relationship with an addict. Either accept it (coz you can't change him - you can only change yourself) or move on. I know that sounds tough, but heroin will eat you up and spit out the bones. In a competition between love and heroin, heroin will win every time. Coz you don't need to buy it flowers, you don't need to listen to all it's bellyaching, you don't have to be nice to it, and it always makes you feel better, no matter how much of an arsehole you've been. It's better you realise this now, than 5 years down the road, when you've wasted a good chunk of your life waiting for a miracle that probably won't ever happen. At least not whilst you are being supportive.
It isn't always an unhappy ending, but relationships rarely survive heroin addiction. I got myself clean, and I haven't looked back. I've got a beautiful baby girl now - my reward for working so hard on my addiction. But I had to split up from my former partner in order to make it happen. It was a bit of a reverse situation to yours, because it was me who took the initiative to split up and move out. But I recognised that I was never going to get clean whilst living with my ex.
Please recognise that he'll never get clean because you want him to, and go and live your life. Better the heartache now, than having to deal with the realisation that you've wasted your love, and precious years you can never get back on someone who can never love you the way you want, and deserve to be loved.
best wishes
Diff xxx
As for what will it take for him to stop. Well, he has to get to the point where the pursuit of that feeling has robbed him of everything else, and that very likely includes you. I feel for ya, being in a relationship with an addict, coz there's nothing you can do to help him, except leave. Unless addicts are left to deal with the consequences of their actions, instead of being given chance after chance by their loved ones, there's not a snowballs chance in hell that they are gonna sort their act out. So my advice to you is the same as i give everyone who's in a relationship with an addict. Either accept it (coz you can't change him - you can only change yourself) or move on. I know that sounds tough, but heroin will eat you up and spit out the bones. In a competition between love and heroin, heroin will win every time. Coz you don't need to buy it flowers, you don't need to listen to all it's bellyaching, you don't have to be nice to it, and it always makes you feel better, no matter how much of an arsehole you've been. It's better you realise this now, than 5 years down the road, when you've wasted a good chunk of your life waiting for a miracle that probably won't ever happen. At least not whilst you are being supportive.
It isn't always an unhappy ending, but relationships rarely survive heroin addiction. I got myself clean, and I haven't looked back. I've got a beautiful baby girl now - my reward for working so hard on my addiction. But I had to split up from my former partner in order to make it happen. It was a bit of a reverse situation to yours, because it was me who took the initiative to split up and move out. But I recognised that I was never going to get clean whilst living with my ex.
Please recognise that he'll never get clean because you want him to, and go and live your life. Better the heartache now, than having to deal with the realisation that you've wasted your love, and precious years you can never get back on someone who can never love you the way you want, and deserve to be loved.
best wishes
Diff xxx
