Why am I constantly trying to ration with myself that "just one more high wont hurt"? I havent caved in and I wont! But those sneaky little thoughts creep into my head during the day when I'm home alone. Like, if no one knows, it wont hurt me, or anyone else. I know that it will hurt. Like a b**ch if I cave in. But why are those thoughts there?!!! Do they ever stop? I know I have to keep myself busy and occupied so I dont get bored but Will they ever stop??????????????
Hi, it's two and a half years since my last last hit. And although those thoughts haven't gone away completely, they are much less frequent, and much less intense. These days it's just a passing thought once every few weeks, not overwhelming, and not a constant battle. It does get easier to deal with, once you start dealing with the other stuff I was talking about on your other post. Seriously, forgiveness is the place to start. You may not even realise that you're holding grudges against the world and yourself. It's only when you forgive that you can move on. It's liberating, it really is.
take care
Diff x
take care
Diff x
Those thoughts(as hard as they me)only become a real problem when we act on them. Do you have a support network for those hard times? A support network can help when those dark thoughts creep up on you......don't keep them to yourself! It would be great if the thoughts go away automatically but as with all addicts everybodies journey differs and those thoughts may stay with you for the long haul and so what if they do because the more you know the more you will grow to the point of being able to brush them off with little to no effort at all. All the best to you!
Well i don't think they ever stop but you have to see them for all they are their just thoughts they aren't orders or giving in its how much power you give these thoughts and how far you let them roam and seduce with their bulls***. I think we may be able to lower the volume of them and maybe even ignore them over time thats just my take i dont know if its bulls*** or not .
Robbyp78
Robbyp78
How ya doing chickie? Hope ya didn't let them thoughts get ya.
May sound stupid, but I used to think of it like this. It's a trick, see? The beast wants to get fed just one more time, but ya feed him and he wants more and more.
If ya don't pick it up ya won't use. Don't touch it. It can work for real.
Hope you are O.K. and please don't be ashamed if ya caved. We been there too. You can kick this thing.
May sound stupid, but I used to think of it like this. It's a trick, see? The beast wants to get fed just one more time, but ya feed him and he wants more and more.
If ya don't pick it up ya won't use. Don't touch it. It can work for real.
Hope you are O.K. and please don't be ashamed if ya caved. We been there too. You can kick this thing.
Hey all. Well, I'm really proud that I bit the bullet, so to speak, these last couple days. The urges came and went. It really isnt that bad. Tough, but not life or death, like my brain is tryin to trick me it is! I just sometimes wish I had never put myself in this position but I know that it was inevitable. Everything happens for a reason, right? There's so much I'm trying to figure out all at once but one thing is for damn sure, I'm NOT going down that road of getting high anymore. No one liked me, not even myself. And I really do love myself, but not when I'm high. So, it's been just a little over 3 weeks now, with no drugs. My last hit of H was in the beginning of December. But then I got into a car accident and the doctor prescribed me Percocet which I just got off of 3 weeks ago. I think that's why my head is so messed up. I stopped shooting, but like 2 weeks later, I was in the hospital on Morphine. So my body just wanted it back again. You know? Thanks for listening guys!
xoxo
Crystal
xoxo
Crystal
