Hi,
My first day of sobriety was anything but. I was so depressed all day. It was a gorgeous day and I chose to lay in bed. Later I took two tylanol with codein, got caught sneaking my husbands vodka from his hiding spot. Went to a play with my kids, drank to much at the reception and had to pull over on the way home to make myself sick to get rid of the hickups.
PATHETIC!. So much for being a closet drinker. I will try again today. I'm so sick of everything. The first thing I'm going to do is throw the codein out! I need help.
Any advice for a mother of four who could desperatly use some help. Perhpas counceling with AA? Has anyone had success with that route?
Please help.
Thanks
Hammer, I tried everything and I mean everything when I tried to get sober for 20 years...what worked for me was AA....as you read about in the post I shared with you in regard to my experience, strength and hope. Success will come when you are ready to surrender, when you are really done...maybe you are not done yet? If your sick and tired of being sick and tired and don't ever want to feel the way you are feeling now, don't pick up just one day at a time. Go to meetings and don't drink or use in between meetings. Mixing alcohol and pills can put you in the grave early; it can destroy your liver. Best of luck to you. Oh, and remember nothing changes if nothing changes. Insanity is when one tries to do the same thing over and over and expect a different result. Pick yourself up and start over again!
VWGIRl,
Thank you so much for your post and word of encouragement. I will ge to a meeting tonight and back to morning meetings this week. I am ready to change. I asked my husband to help me and now he is questioning my every move and watching me like a hawk!
I went to chuch today and prayed super hard for God to help me. I need his grace and support. I'm afraid I'm not done yet...that is the insanity but I will try one day at a time.
Thanks again. I am really drawing strength from you.
Thank you so much for your post and word of encouragement. I will ge to a meeting tonight and back to morning meetings this week. I am ready to change. I asked my husband to help me and now he is questioning my every move and watching me like a hawk!
I went to chuch today and prayed super hard for God to help me. I need his grace and support. I'm afraid I'm not done yet...that is the insanity but I will try one day at a time.
Thanks again. I am really drawing strength from you.
Hammer, glad you are going to a meeting...reach out to others there, especially the women...try to get a few phone numbers of some gals with time and every time you feel like drinking give one of them a call. Church and prayer are all good...ask for God to provide you with the willingness to surrender...ask for God's will to be done and not your will...his will is not for you to pick up a drink. Pray for the craving and obsession to be removed one day at time upon rising and upon hitting the pillow at night thank God for granting you another day of sobriety. I never had a DUI, was never arrested, never lost my job, or had huge financial wreckage, but what I did lose was my children, the love for myself, my esteem and any hope....I was ready to do myself in...you do not have to go to that low of a bottom...but if you are an alcoholic woman like I am you don't stand a chance if you keep on drinking and using...take it easy and know that I am here for you.
Nice posts VW Girl,
My sobriety date is St. Patricks Day. I'm losing count of the days. I am finding alot of strength in AA as well. I was shy at first but now have numbers for people to call and am doing better. One additional thing I will say is arrive early and stay late. Help put up chairs, try to talk to anyone you can. This helps people get to know you so you will feel more comfortable calling them. It's a great program and will work for you if you work for it.
But you gotta be ready. So if you go out and mess up don't let it stop you from going back. People there just want to help and see you get clean. So go in listen and go back and do it again. Try not to drink inbetween meetings.
Hang in there and don't give up.
pm
My sobriety date is St. Patricks Day. I'm losing count of the days. I am finding alot of strength in AA as well. I was shy at first but now have numbers for people to call and am doing better. One additional thing I will say is arrive early and stay late. Help put up chairs, try to talk to anyone you can. This helps people get to know you so you will feel more comfortable calling them. It's a great program and will work for you if you work for it.
But you gotta be ready. So if you go out and mess up don't let it stop you from going back. People there just want to help and see you get clean. So go in listen and go back and do it again. Try not to drink inbetween meetings.
Hang in there and don't give up.
pm
Hi!
Thanks so much for the advice. I'm going to a beginners meeting tonight at 6:15 and then an open speaker at 7:30. I dread walking back in after being a way for a while. I don't know these people very well and all they know about me is I keep screwing up.
I have no more pain meds or alcohol in the house. I need to keep my thinking straight and not go back out.
Pregnantmom, congrats on your sobriety. That's awesome. You've almost got a month! You can make it.
Thanks and let me know how you're doing.
Hammer
Thanks so much for the advice. I'm going to a beginners meeting tonight at 6:15 and then an open speaker at 7:30. I dread walking back in after being a way for a while. I don't know these people very well and all they know about me is I keep screwing up.
I have no more pain meds or alcohol in the house. I need to keep my thinking straight and not go back out.
Pregnantmom, congrats on your sobriety. That's awesome. You've almost got a month! You can make it.
Thanks and let me know how you're doing.
Hammer
hammer.....i dont know how long you was drinking for but for me it was 20 years + which although not as long as some people it was still a long time and in the end i was spiritualy and mentaly very ill,so the way i looked at it for me is it was going to take a long time for me to get better.
i wont kid you and say it was easy,but yesterday was my 2nd birthday of sobriety,you can do it if you want to.
give time,time friend
Paul
i wont kid you and say it was easy,but yesterday was my 2nd birthday of sobriety,you can do it if you want to.
give time,time friend
Paul
Thanks Paul and everyone else!
Thanks so much for your input. I too have drank for 20+ years and am spiritually, mentally sick. I just got back from a meeting where a women talked about how she has a new relationship with her HP and how exciting it is. That sounds wonderful. I'd love have a relationship with my HP..whoever that may be.
I'm just a few hours away from bed, I'm in a safe place, I made for today and I'm greatful. No pills, no booze. Thank God for my first day of sobriety....again.
Thanks so much for your input. I too have drank for 20+ years and am spiritually, mentally sick. I just got back from a meeting where a women talked about how she has a new relationship with her HP and how exciting it is. That sounds wonderful. I'd love have a relationship with my HP..whoever that may be.
I'm just a few hours away from bed, I'm in a safe place, I made for today and I'm greatful. No pills, no booze. Thank God for my first day of sobriety....again.
Good Evening Hammer and Good Job! You never have to change your sobriety date ever again, 04/03/2006 is a fine day to begin your journey! What might also help you is to phone someone every morning who is on the Program and commit to being sober for just that day - ya know, one day at a time - that way you are making yourself accountable...you've got one day and that's what we all start with, one day and another day and another day. I read the willingness in your posts, talk to your HP, pray that you may find a God of your own understanding...it will all come if you just don't pick up that drink or drug!
Hammer
Oh I can so relate to you about the meetings. I tried AA a bout a year ago but wasn't truly in my heart ready to quit, so of course I was right back drinking after a very short time.
Now I'm truly ready to recover I'm on Day 6 right now but SO ashamed to walk back into those AA meetings. I know I have to do it, but just struggling with it right now.
Don't beat yourself up though, you're doing the very best you can right at this moment.
I did 4.5 days last week then slipped on day 6 now again. Something happened to me after that last slip - I completely surrendered my alcoholism to my Higher Power. Since then I have not had one single craving. I can't explain it. Until 6 days ago I used to crave constantly, now its gone.
Don't get me wrong, I still have a lot of recovery to do - but something in me healed.
I pray for everyone struggling with this that they can surrender and be healed also.
Oh I can so relate to you about the meetings. I tried AA a bout a year ago but wasn't truly in my heart ready to quit, so of course I was right back drinking after a very short time.
Now I'm truly ready to recover I'm on Day 6 right now but SO ashamed to walk back into those AA meetings. I know I have to do it, but just struggling with it right now.
Don't beat yourself up though, you're doing the very best you can right at this moment.
I did 4.5 days last week then slipped on day 6 now again. Something happened to me after that last slip - I completely surrendered my alcoholism to my Higher Power. Since then I have not had one single craving. I can't explain it. Until 6 days ago I used to crave constantly, now its gone.
Don't get me wrong, I still have a lot of recovery to do - but something in me healed.
I pray for everyone struggling with this that they can surrender and be healed also.
Oh Hammer
I took my first drink at age 13, it was all downhill after that LOL I am 36 years old now, also female.
Congratulations on 1 day. Fantastic, well done.
U know, I'm not sure who my HP is either LOL, but I know for sure that there is one, and that not only is it a universal power its a power within me.
I finally figured it out last week, the reason we can't fix these problems on our own is because we weren't meant to.
We are designed to co-exist with the higher power. When we shut that out, try to do it on our own we screw everything up - I know I did. Its only now that I'm letting that higher power in, working with that power, surrendering to it that I am beginning to pick up the pieces of the mess I created of myself.
Here's my email if you want to chat: idgie2529@yahoo.com
I took my first drink at age 13, it was all downhill after that LOL I am 36 years old now, also female.
Congratulations on 1 day. Fantastic, well done.
U know, I'm not sure who my HP is either LOL, but I know for sure that there is one, and that not only is it a universal power its a power within me.
I finally figured it out last week, the reason we can't fix these problems on our own is because we weren't meant to.
We are designed to co-exist with the higher power. When we shut that out, try to do it on our own we screw everything up - I know I did. Its only now that I'm letting that higher power in, working with that power, surrendering to it that I am beginning to pick up the pieces of the mess I created of myself.
Here's my email if you want to chat: idgie2529@yahoo.com
