Hello all, as you know I have posted looking for some help on my paper...but i have found sooo much more. Just going through & reading all of your posts you have showed me something I once didn't believe in. You've all showed me that people do really care even if they don't know you. This is a lesson I had to learn on my own when I began freshman year & up until just before I started senior year. I had a terrible depression problem & the fact that no one would ask if I was ok just seemed to make things worse. I would open up to a few people, but the people i really thought cared about me (like my parents & some of my closest friends) acted like they thought I was fine. I dunno, maybe I was just good at covering it up, but it felt like anyone that ever had any really influence on my life cared for me about as much as they would if a blade of grass was stepped on. So, i started experimenting with stuff to try & see what made some of my friends enjoy doing pills & Marajuana, & alcohol soo much. It was fine while I was around people, but otherwise I wouldn't do it for fear of gettin caught by my mom (divorced family). I still ended up being really deppressed & really started thinking about death. While growing up, 3 of my 4 grandparents passed away, so death seemed like a natural process. There was no questioning of whether there was a God or heaven, just that if you knew you'd been good, you'd make it to heaven & get to see God. The only thing that really kept me from commiting suicide was the little string of hope I held onto that someone did care. Then my bf broke up w/ me. I almost lost it. I was ready to kill myself & then i got a call from a friend. I asked her if she'd miss me if I didn't come back to school after Christmas break. Thank God she said yes. We spent 3 hours talking on the phone & finally someone cared! I was so happy. But by about February that feeling went away & i got super depressed again. I finally talked to my Youth Minister about how I was feeling & he got my mom to get me help. The guy I went to helped me sort out everything & I found out that I really had no belief that anyone truely cared about anything. Pretty soon I realized (with some help) that it couldn't be that way. Through all that I helped one friend survive her drinking problem. I was so happy & convinced that my purpose was to help everyone I knew feel needed & cared for. Sorry about rambling on I just noticed that through this site I see more proof that tons of people care & hope that all of you realize what a great impact you have on others lives!
E-June
Thanks for sharing that with us e-june. It's easy to feel that way in this busy , fast paced world. No matter how depressed you may feel , there are many people that really DO care. Many are closer than you realize, many are people you havnt even met yet. The world really is a wonderful compassionate place ,......even if it may not seem that way at times... thanks again and best wishes
Hi E-June,
Great posting. I too feel the caring, concern from others here on this site. I also love that I can say things to people and get positive responses. When I don't get that from my kids, it hurts. Being here is so much easier than being in the actual presence of someone. The pressure to "do the right thing" is not there. We are all just here to share with each other and not to judge. The bottom line is that by sharing our experience's we can shed some light on someone else. It is up to each one of us to get what we can from here and for me it helps me to give back. My husband kindof yelled at me the other night about going to this site everday. I did not do something he asked me to do so he said that I have more time to get on this site than to do anything else. I was quite sad when he said that but I had to explain to him that this is all I have right now. If I did not have this site to come to, that I don't know how i would be taking all of this. It was a quick "I'm sorry" from him. All in all, I loved your posting.
Cathy
Great posting. I too feel the caring, concern from others here on this site. I also love that I can say things to people and get positive responses. When I don't get that from my kids, it hurts. Being here is so much easier than being in the actual presence of someone. The pressure to "do the right thing" is not there. We are all just here to share with each other and not to judge. The bottom line is that by sharing our experience's we can shed some light on someone else. It is up to each one of us to get what we can from here and for me it helps me to give back. My husband kindof yelled at me the other night about going to this site everday. I did not do something he asked me to do so he said that I have more time to get on this site than to do anything else. I was quite sad when he said that but I had to explain to him that this is all I have right now. If I did not have this site to come to, that I don't know how i would be taking all of this. It was a quick "I'm sorry" from him. All in all, I loved your posting.
Cathy
