7 Days And Counting

Well I thought I would check in as I feel better everytime I do. Tonight marks my first full week......

I am feeling better and stronger everyday, a little bit at a time. I am still nowhere close to a regular sleep cycle......how long does that usually take when you go unaided (no Ambien, etc)??? I went for a 6 mile run today and I was dogging it!!!!!! But I felt a lot more relaxed afterward. I definitely concur with the excercise suggestions.........but for the first 4 days I just couldn't......

I am taking everything day by day but I know my next big hurdle is making it back to NYC where the habit last saw me. I am going to check out the support group on the UES (thanks Sammy!) as soon as possible.

I have found that repeating these 3 thoughts to myself help calm me down when my mind starts wandering around...contemplating the possibility of "recreational" use:

1) You cannot use these recreationally. (Some people can perhaps, but not you. )

2) You dont want to take them because you werent even getting a high off of them. (You CAN get a high off of: excercise, falling in love, doing something nice for someone, doing something nice for yourself, being proud that you were able to confront this when you really didnt want to.....)

3) You never, never want to go through Days 1-4 again.

I hope everyone out there is having a better day than yesterday and if not please let someone know.....

Brian

PS- Thanks again to everyone for their help!!!!

Let me be the first one to congratulate you........wooohoooooooo Bri.......keep up the good work and the positive thinking

take care,
Hilary
Hey Brian,
You are sounding good, dude. I might be in the city next weekend and if you want someone to go to the Pills Anonymous meeting at Jan Hus Church with you, let me know.

The things you keep reminding yourself about the pills are great. Try to write down all of the horrible feelings that detox provided so you can re-read them when temptation strikes further down the road. It can be extremely helpful.

Great job with the exercise also the more water you drink the greater cleansing effect you will receive. The sleep thing might take a while, but I would suggest getting off the ambien as soon as you can because they are also addictive and a b**ch to come off of as well. One thing you might want to try if you still are having sleep issues is melatonin. The most effective brand I have found is Source naturals 5mg orange flavored sublingual. You can get it at most health food stores

Sara
Brian. That was a terrific post and a great Mantra....I am sure no one wants to relive days 1-4.

You are a breath of fresh air on these boards and I am glad you found your way here.

Safe trip back to NYC...Peace
Hilary,

Thanks for the reply. How are you doing?

I am looking out at a beautiful Oregon sky over downtown portland with big full clouds dotting the landscape.........I cant remember when the last time was that I appreciated something so simple.....took the time to actually APPRECIATE it. I guess for the past year I thought taking 6-10 hydro's and watching TV was life. Taking 6-10 hydros and working out was life. Taking 6-10 hydros and sitting reading the paper was life.

I must say, without sounding too optimistic and with tons of respect for everyone out there who is struggling (trust me I am too), I am getting a bit of a "high" off of feeling deep emotions for the first time in along time. I have been feeling so connected to old friends and family these days. I cry often these last few days.. And I never cry.

It feels good.

Thanks guys....remember it is you who have been a big help thusfar. I hope to continue to see your great advice and support in the future.

Sara-

That would be great. Sorry if I was misscommunicating...I have not taken Ambien....I had inquired earlier as to whether that was a good solution. I am going to see how these next few days in Portland go (during which my schedule is not as demanding) and then hopefully my sleeping will be catching up.

So what are each of you up to in terms of recovery.........how long if you are sober, what was your addiction? I feel bad not knowing more about all of you and your stories......
Alone in NY and Sara-Your advice seemed so logical and simple, exactly what I was looking for. Not for myself but for my boyfriend who is currently on day 8 from vicodin withdrawl....I have been looking for tips of things he can do just to feel better on a daily basis. He is through with all the vomiting and physical stuff but now it seems there is a lot of back pain and just general periods where he seems stressed out. I realize he and you all are going through so much, but being on the outside of this is something that is also hard to comprehend. I myself have never been dependant on something so much that if I dont have it I get sick....so I am only doing my very best to be there for him. You said lots of excercise and water helps? Anything else? Any secret recipies or anything just to help out? Please let me know! I just want to let you know that you are all in my thoughts daily, and I hope that your tomorrow is even better and more easy than today.~Amanda
Hi,
I was addicted to Vicodin/Lortab/Percocet, etc. It all started with a back problem and became a whole other thing. I have been clean almost 5 months now and most of the time I feel great about it. I checked myself in to rehab in early Jan and was there appx. two weeks (it would have been too tough to come off these pills at home with two young sons yelling Mommy all day. Nowadays, I seek out alot of support to guard my sobriety. I never want to have that dang monkey on my back again. I felt really strong in my sobriety until about 90 days and then it got tough for a little bit, so I went to a bunch of meetings and talked about the challenges I was feeling. It got easy again for a while and is a little tough now cuz my back is bothering me again, and my addiction keeps whispering in my ear, think about how much better your back would feel with some vicodin. Luckily, my brain is still rational and I am aware of the consequences, but It gets hard sometimes. I imagine it will get this way on occasion forever and that's why I think it's so important to keep going to meetings, etc.
Sara
Sara, I went thru the same thing at 90 days, irrational cravings. And like you I have a back problem, it is worse today and so the pain pill issue comes to mind but I know that I cannot use. I've been clean since December and my soberity means more to me than ever. Just wanted to know I'm in total emphaty with you.

Sharon
Sharon,
I think the saying, "this too shall pass" is a wonderful mantra to "survive" the difficult times.
Sara