I have a very soon to be 21 year old son who I believe has an addiction problem. He is the middle child of 3. He wasn't an easy child, always given to temper tantrums and anger outbursts. He would fly off the handle over things like not having shirt clean that he had planned to wear. He was a gifted athlete but wasn't easy to coach. He barely passed high school even though he is very intelligent. I believe his drug issues started around 15. I heard from other parents that he would be at parties where pills were readily available. I guess I always thought it would be alcohol or marijuanna and I didn't know what a teenager on pills looked like. I think there was a time where he laid off using but it's very obvious that he has started again. A couple of weeks ago after an argument with his dad he told me that he has a substance abuse issue. I asked him if it was pills and he said sometimes and also alcohol. I told him I would help him and that this was a fixable issue but he didn't want help and the next day he didn't even want to discuss it. He dropped out of college after one semester. He can't keep a job, lays around all day doing nothing. He is fully capable of working but refuses. I don't believe at this point he could pass a drug test to get a decent job. I believe his depressed and possibly even bipolar. He will have temper outbursts, throw things, punch the wall, etc. I love this person so completely and with my entire heart but he's bringing down our entire family and I want to help him but don't know where to start. I am even afraid he could harm himself. I know we are enabling him but I don't know what to do. He has a very supportive family, he is intelligent, beautiful, and the funniest person I know. My heart is breaking seeing him like this. Thanks for anyone who read till the end!
Your son sounds like me (in 1960).
A garden variety addict/alcoholic with a long hard life in front of him.
I strongly suggest you contact your local Al-Anon and Nar-Anon groups for guidance and support.
All the best.
Bob R
A garden variety addict/alcoholic with a long hard life in front of him.
I strongly suggest you contact your local Al-Anon and Nar-Anon groups for guidance and support.
All the best.
Bob R
My son gets angry, mad and downright mean when he is using. So take that as a sign. If he has been using pills in the past you might not want to hear it but he may be using heroin now. Opiate Pills are much harder to get with the government and doctors cracking down on prescriptions and many turn to another, cheaper opiate - heroin, first smoking it or snorting it then using a needle (which is how they may have injested the pills too). In my generation heroin was the big no-no. Not even the crazy-let's try anything drug users in high school would even mention heroin, never mind take it. It's a different story nowadays. It's everywhere, it's an epidemic. When they use the opiate drugs make them want to continue using and reject all attempts at getting clean. He may have tried to get clean himself before and withdrawals could be something he doesn't want to face again. A detox place can help with that, making him comfortable during detox. Or, if he is using pills or heroin (both opiates) he can detox and continue using suboxone (daily opiate blocker) or vivitrol (once a month shot). I don't recommend methadone. you can go on the suboxone website to find a provider in your area that accepts your insurance. Perhaps suboxone along with counseling would be a much more doable option for your son. I highly recommend the vivitrol shot, although you have to be off opiates (including suboxone) for 4-7 days I think. With suboxone, only 12 hours or so I believe. These drugs also curb alcohol cravings I believe, especially the vivitrol. However they are more effective when combines with counseling or an outpatient program. Many addicts will try this alternate route because they are afraid of withdrawal and being locked away in rehab.
You are probably like I was when my son was 16, thinking oh, it's pills, prescription, not his prescription, but medicine. I had no idea what that really meant or the road to heroin we were to embark upon. My son was a star athlete, an honor student before using and no trouble growing up - hated to even take Tylenol, preferring to tough it out! I was nave, in denial and grateful my son had not done some of the things I had learned other users do. But as the years went by (he's 22) I checked off those things on the list one by one, followed by outpatient, inpatient, long term recovery, trouble with the law, lost job after lost job, lies etc. Perhaps if I hadn't been so nave and caught this very early and very seriously we still wouldn't be in the endless cycle of rehabs and oversdoses. I wish I knew the seriousness of it while he was under 18 and I could commit him to a rehab. But finishing school and applying to colleges seemed like the priority. Was I wrong!!! That college will be there and not even know your name when you overdose or die. Your sobriety and recovery are what is the number one priority.
Maintenance Recovery medication is a long road. But a great alternative to what opiate pills (or heroin) mixed with alcohol can do - overdose and death. I wish you luck.
You are probably like I was when my son was 16, thinking oh, it's pills, prescription, not his prescription, but medicine. I had no idea what that really meant or the road to heroin we were to embark upon. My son was a star athlete, an honor student before using and no trouble growing up - hated to even take Tylenol, preferring to tough it out! I was nave, in denial and grateful my son had not done some of the things I had learned other users do. But as the years went by (he's 22) I checked off those things on the list one by one, followed by outpatient, inpatient, long term recovery, trouble with the law, lost job after lost job, lies etc. Perhaps if I hadn't been so nave and caught this very early and very seriously we still wouldn't be in the endless cycle of rehabs and oversdoses. I wish I knew the seriousness of it while he was under 18 and I could commit him to a rehab. But finishing school and applying to colleges seemed like the priority. Was I wrong!!! That college will be there and not even know your name when you overdose or die. Your sobriety and recovery are what is the number one priority.
Maintenance Recovery medication is a long road. But a great alternative to what opiate pills (or heroin) mixed with alcohol can do - overdose and death. I wish you luck.
