Smilez everyone,
I have had run ins with pain medication too many times. I was in a car accident on Nov. 16th 2005. I wanted to touch base with you all to tell you my story. Unfortunately I had a problem taking pain med's before my car crash. I started like many others. I had chronic kidney stones that went from passing them and having lithotripsy. No doubt I took them like M&M's trying to kill that pain.Well, this was the start. I took them for recreation for years then felt the agony of withdrawals too many times. I did manage to stay clean for almost 10 months. Before this I would take up to 15 to 20 pills a day. God I was worried about the liver damage from all the Tylenol. Tylenol can be toxic to the liver as most of you know. Unlike aspirin that when stopped, your liver has a chance to heal its self. Tylenol is a different story! Your liver will not heal after it has be beat down.
I went to a Methadone treatment center that did take the cravings away but I did trade one drug for another but during the treatment, I never again spent the 100-200 dollar a day habit. I felt like my life was given back to me. I did not get high off of the drug and never had trouble functioning. I actually gained 30 lbs and it was needed on my 6' frame. I thought my life had been returned to me. I was so happy I actually started the weaning off the methadone.
I was coming from a meeting/class for CPR. This was a mandatory class for my position on Military contracts. During my commute home from the class I hit Standing water on the road from a heavy downpour and hydroplaned into the oncoming lane. I broke my hand, both hips, tibia, right femur, ribs and lacerated liver. I was on life support for 3 days and in a medicated coma due to brain injury. Thank God I survived. Unlike the person I hit that evening. This alone messes my head up. When I woke from the coma, I looked to the left and saw that morephine machine. I rolled my head back and said "s***". I was back on the Med's.
It has been 2 years almost and I am still taking pain med's for the pain in my hips. I also have a few more surgeries for a broken hand as well as a non-union fracture of the femur. I had a bone growth stimulator installed but the healing is slow.
I now take the medicine as a need basis. I take it a directed and sometimes skip doses. I still feel like I am an addict. I told my orthopedic doctor I wanted to taper off. They took me from 20 mg's of Oxycontin with 10 mg of percocet to only 5 milligrams of percocet. I then started hurting very bad and had to go back to 10 mg's. I hate this but in my mind I cannot justify taking this crap but when I stop, I hurt like hell. I know it is there for this reason but after all the crap I've been through it is hard to justify. Even though I have tried to deal with the pain without the meds but or refrain from taking meds, I will stay up in pain. I actually stayed up for 5 days straight with pain then collapsed for 32 hours. I know I am the type of person that needs this medication due to the metal and rods installed in my hips but I still feel guilty.
I know I can quit but God knows it is going to be a long road. I ask everyone that reads this to pray for my healing and an easy transition when I quit taking this medicine.
Thank you all and God Bless everyone of you.
Hey Been, I am so sorry for your accident. I recently broke my ankle and know the torturous pain of a broken bone. Please don't beat yourself up. You need to stop and ask yourself what it is that you want from life. You may or may not be in need of narcotic pain medication...my Doctor, a recovering addict and an addiction specialist tells me that narcs actually make pain worse over a prolonged period of time.
I thought that I would die with the pain I was in and much to my surprise, I stopped taking Vicodin after 4 day and and Tylenol worked fine. I am not comparing my pain to yours...but I want you to recognize that you perhaps are in a position to stop. Maybe a short suboxone detox will help you get off the narcs....I have heard that you can do this with 10 days.
Most importantly you need a spiritual program of recovery, how about AA/NA....I never thought I would find solace and comfort there....what I have found is so much more. Your spiritual health is as important as your physical heath...when you get the two of them in sync, a miracle will come your way. Give it some thought. Praying that you are OK.
I thought that I would die with the pain I was in and much to my surprise, I stopped taking Vicodin after 4 day and and Tylenol worked fine. I am not comparing my pain to yours...but I want you to recognize that you perhaps are in a position to stop. Maybe a short suboxone detox will help you get off the narcs....I have heard that you can do this with 10 days.
Most importantly you need a spiritual program of recovery, how about AA/NA....I never thought I would find solace and comfort there....what I have found is so much more. Your spiritual health is as important as your physical heath...when you get the two of them in sync, a miracle will come your way. Give it some thought. Praying that you are OK.
Hey:
Boy, can I relate to your story. I was hooked on pain killers years ago simply recreationally. Then I was clean for 8 years. Then I got hooked again for severe migraines, they finally ceased and for the most part I was off the pills again with the exception of the occasional binge. THEN - Jan 19, 2005 - I fell and broke my leg, it was a pretty bad break which required surgery to put in a rod & screws. The bone had pretty much come thru the skin so they were concerned about the skin. I developed pnuemonia from being flat on my back, so back in the hospital for a couple of days. During that time I got that staph infection that you get from the hospital (MRSA) in the bone. So they had to go in and clean (debridement) and remove all hardware and put in an external fixator. I was also on a wound vac to try to speed up the healing of the external wound where the bone had come thru. Anyway, I was in the damn hospital for 5 months straight and had 8 more operations. But, there was non-union, so basically I was walking around on a bone that was still broken. I was on IV antibiotics and left the hospital with a pic line for easy access to the vein. In spite of all this I managed to get off the pill (for the most part) again, for several months. Then a screw broke and all hell broke loose. My first orthopedic surgeon (who I hated) set me to a specialist who focused on the ankle. They though the infection was back, so back on the IV antibiotics, another operation to remove the broken screw and all the hardware. Back in a cast (it was my 8th cast). Eventually, they decided the infection wasn't back (thank God), I had another operation to put hardware back in and do a bone graft, because the bone had never healed! My last operation was in Oct., I'm no longer in a cast per se, I'm in a walking boot. Around Christmas time I fell, and now I have 2 more broken screws. They don't know what to do, mainly they want to amputate. I've fought so hard for 2 years and I don't want to lose my leg and I'm really scared about that. My right leg is about 2 inches shorter than my left due to so much removal of infected bone. Poin management sent me home from the hospital with 10 mgs of Oxy every 8 hours, 2 mgs diludid every 6 hours and 10 mg Lortab every 4 hours. Due to my past addiction my tolerence level is so high, they can barely manage the pain. I quit the Oxy & the dilaudid pretty quickly. But I'm still on the 10 mg Lortab and I get 6 a day. I have such a hard time controlling it that I usually take more. So, I feel your pain (no pun intended) and I don't know what the answer is. Did I mention that even with the bone graft I have non-union, it still won't heal!!! I wish you the best and I can so relate what you're going thru. Hang in there!
Boy, can I relate to your story. I was hooked on pain killers years ago simply recreationally. Then I was clean for 8 years. Then I got hooked again for severe migraines, they finally ceased and for the most part I was off the pills again with the exception of the occasional binge. THEN - Jan 19, 2005 - I fell and broke my leg, it was a pretty bad break which required surgery to put in a rod & screws. The bone had pretty much come thru the skin so they were concerned about the skin. I developed pnuemonia from being flat on my back, so back in the hospital for a couple of days. During that time I got that staph infection that you get from the hospital (MRSA) in the bone. So they had to go in and clean (debridement) and remove all hardware and put in an external fixator. I was also on a wound vac to try to speed up the healing of the external wound where the bone had come thru. Anyway, I was in the damn hospital for 5 months straight and had 8 more operations. But, there was non-union, so basically I was walking around on a bone that was still broken. I was on IV antibiotics and left the hospital with a pic line for easy access to the vein. In spite of all this I managed to get off the pill (for the most part) again, for several months. Then a screw broke and all hell broke loose. My first orthopedic surgeon (who I hated) set me to a specialist who focused on the ankle. They though the infection was back, so back on the IV antibiotics, another operation to remove the broken screw and all the hardware. Back in a cast (it was my 8th cast). Eventually, they decided the infection wasn't back (thank God), I had another operation to put hardware back in and do a bone graft, because the bone had never healed! My last operation was in Oct., I'm no longer in a cast per se, I'm in a walking boot. Around Christmas time I fell, and now I have 2 more broken screws. They don't know what to do, mainly they want to amputate. I've fought so hard for 2 years and I don't want to lose my leg and I'm really scared about that. My right leg is about 2 inches shorter than my left due to so much removal of infected bone. Poin management sent me home from the hospital with 10 mgs of Oxy every 8 hours, 2 mgs diludid every 6 hours and 10 mg Lortab every 4 hours. Due to my past addiction my tolerence level is so high, they can barely manage the pain. I quit the Oxy & the dilaudid pretty quickly. But I'm still on the 10 mg Lortab and I get 6 a day. I have such a hard time controlling it that I usually take more. So, I feel your pain (no pun intended) and I don't know what the answer is. Did I mention that even with the bone graft I have non-union, it still won't heal!!! I wish you the best and I can so relate what you're going thru. Hang in there!
