I no longer live in the same city as this friend, so I can't see things first hand. And when I do visit, her son is sure to take off before I get there.
I'm pretty sure her 34 year old son is a drug addict. The reasons why--and more--will be explained. But son has told his mother and grandparents that he has Common Variable Immune Deficiency (CVID) syndrome, which is a genuine condition (for people who really have been diagnosed with it). I believe he uses this to wrest money away from his mother and grandparents to pay for drugs. He does not have a job. He has forged $30K in checks and stole his grandparents' coin collection.
Neither his mother not grandparents have ever seen a medical bill, been with him to a doctor visit, seen his prescription bottles, seen a doctor's certificate that he is terminally ill, yet that is what he tells them. He doesn't have a regular doctor, instead, he goes to the ER for his "shots" his "infusion" and "kidney flush." Oh and when he feels ill, which is about once a week.
One week, every time after she told me he'd "been to the ER," I called every ER in two counties. Three times in one week I called every ER and there was no such patient. And then his "treatments" make no sense. $2,000 for 3 blood transfusions and 2 stem cell therapy treatments "in both arms" --which should have cost about $46,000. I could go on and on and on and on with the ridiculous stories.
How do I get her to face reality? Should I get her to face reality? She and her parents have given him so much money that she is now reduced to selling her houehold furnishings. This is a drug addict's manipulation, but she refuses to believe. The CVID story makes excuses for his "illness" and trackmarks. Even the police have said they were trackmarks.
I feel badly for my friend and I have given her a little money to get by once in a while. Then all she did was take out more loans, after I paid one off and said, Don't give him one more dime! This made me mad.
Should I just cut her off? She has no more friends. But I am certain this is the behavior of a selfish drug addict. Advice?
Ask for proof.
There is no "proof." Mom say he wants "his privacy rerespected" and there are no bills, no receipts, nothing. They get into big shouting matches over it but then he cries and she relents because he is "terminally ill" and trying to cope. I do not believe this. She has shelled out $23,000 plus in a year.
