I have two girls too...and it's actually making me weep to see that you're doing so fantastically...they're getting their mum back...stick at it Seren...you are an amazing person...truly amazing...to have got yourself to this point and to want to get clean...you got my total respect and admiration girl!
Much love, Maddy x x x
Ser, where ya at?
When ya get a chance let us know, O.K.?
We got ya girlie. No matter what we're pulling for you. Ya been very brave, Ser.
Thinking of ya.
When ya get a chance let us know, O.K.?
We got ya girlie. No matter what we're pulling for you. Ya been very brave, Ser.
Thinking of ya.
hi everyone
thanx for being here and thinking of me,
it means sooo much to know that u care,we went away for one night ,me bf and our two girls,no where special ,just a cheap hotel,loads of arcade games for the girls,and no gear for the first time in years!!did we miss the gear?????????
hell yeah!!but we got through,i always thought that if i/we stopped that it would be ok cause we could have some gear once week or so and that would be ok,we could deal with it,i have been off the gear now 18 days,i know that is good and all that,but at this moment it really does my head in,that i cant have the occasional bit of gear,without it becoming a problem,cause to be honest i like being stoned ,i just hate the s*** that comes with it,sorry if i upset someone,just whats in my head
seren
thanx for being here and thinking of me,
it means sooo much to know that u care,we went away for one night ,me bf and our two girls,no where special ,just a cheap hotel,loads of arcade games for the girls,and no gear for the first time in years!!did we miss the gear?????????
hell yeah!!but we got through,i always thought that if i/we stopped that it would be ok cause we could have some gear once week or so and that would be ok,we could deal with it,i have been off the gear now 18 days,i know that is good and all that,but at this moment it really does my head in,that i cant have the occasional bit of gear,without it becoming a problem,cause to be honest i like being stoned ,i just hate the s*** that comes with it,sorry if i upset someone,just whats in my head
seren
Seren, well done on your clean time, you're doing great... That pisses me off also...why can't i just get stoned once a month? Why can't i do X once a month and so on....why? cause i'm an addict.. one would never be enough.Seren, keep it up, like everyone says it does get better, you must feel it in yourself, eh?, Take care, Kev
Hi & welcome back
As everyone knows ,I also am on mdone. No-one judges here. Mdone is a different / and effective way to assist you in stopping the abuse of a illegal & dangerous street drug.
- Although these days doctors send people with pain pills problems to a clinic-
No-one says you have to be on it foreever, & dont feel like you have to rush to get off it. Sure ideally you would like to just use it as short term detox tool. However,some of us are sicker than others and need it for longer periods of time.
As time goes on youll will lose the desire to use heroin, you may even try to use while your on mdone- & then realize that you cant feel it, and your throwing money away trying.
Dont let mdone get you lazy. It can do that. Stay active. Get involved in activities that chasing heroin kept you from. - When your ready to detox ,you ,ll know it, and the counslers & medical people at the clinic will help you.
respect,
jack
As everyone knows ,I also am on mdone. No-one judges here. Mdone is a different / and effective way to assist you in stopping the abuse of a illegal & dangerous street drug.
- Although these days doctors send people with pain pills problems to a clinic-
No-one says you have to be on it foreever, & dont feel like you have to rush to get off it. Sure ideally you would like to just use it as short term detox tool. However,some of us are sicker than others and need it for longer periods of time.
As time goes on youll will lose the desire to use heroin, you may even try to use while your on mdone- & then realize that you cant feel it, and your throwing money away trying.
Dont let mdone get you lazy. It can do that. Stay active. Get involved in activities that chasing heroin kept you from. - When your ready to detox ,you ,ll know it, and the counslers & medical people at the clinic will help you.
respect,
jack
seren, don't let the beast trick ya.........it's a trick........your brain chemistry is all out of whack.........I know it seems like right now everything is flat........senseless...........that "Is this all there is?" feeling.
Yeah ya miss the dope.......just me, but it is a true longing and that coupled with the habit........the ritual.........and then the biggie being the actual brain chemistry screw up...........who wouldn't want to use now and again?
You got this far.......and indeed I so know........we all know seren........ya expect it to pass.........be gone with it already.........but consider the amount of time we put into it and how long we used..........I know it's hard, but it will pass.....you're allowed to get sad........cry........yearn.......but any guilt, babes you just replace that with your tough self who is beating this extremely tough, tough monster.......give yourself some credit, K?
Meanwhile like Jack has said.........you can consider the methadone program if you're that nervous and ready to pick up.......Jack, and Amity, and Shirley and Zero Girl, and Davey............all them can help ya with that.
You just hang in there, O.K. cause you're doing great.........really good.
If ya have a few bucks, seren get some B-Complex and definately them Omega-3 Fish Oils.........if even for the fact cause they are pills they make ya feel better...........hey, I believe they helped me..........and Amino Acids definately to get your brain chemistry going back..........it can help.
Yeah ya miss the dope.......just me, but it is a true longing and that coupled with the habit........the ritual.........and then the biggie being the actual brain chemistry screw up...........who wouldn't want to use now and again?
You got this far.......and indeed I so know........we all know seren........ya expect it to pass.........be gone with it already.........but consider the amount of time we put into it and how long we used..........I know it's hard, but it will pass.....you're allowed to get sad........cry........yearn.......but any guilt, babes you just replace that with your tough self who is beating this extremely tough, tough monster.......give yourself some credit, K?
Meanwhile like Jack has said.........you can consider the methadone program if you're that nervous and ready to pick up.......Jack, and Amity, and Shirley and Zero Girl, and Davey............all them can help ya with that.
You just hang in there, O.K. cause you're doing great.........really good.
If ya have a few bucks, seren get some B-Complex and definately them Omega-3 Fish Oils.........if even for the fact cause they are pills they make ya feel better...........hey, I believe they helped me..........and Amino Acids definately to get your brain chemistry going back..........it can help.
How ya doin Seren? x x
What an inspiring post to read!! congrats to you S!
I usually post on the PP forum...however I think I have kindred spirit with y'all....I am an opiate addict period.
The changes that your brain endure while on opiates is unlike any other. It is devastating, but it is irreversible!! Those little receptors that have been growing like mad to take in all those opiates....are now left there alone and screaming.....that is why the mental phase of addiction is wicked. It truly is a "brain chemistry" thing.
I know what worked for me and that was working a program...getting therapy....and just educating myself about addiction. It has made such a difference in my life. Maybe if you get some face to face support, it will help...actually I know it will.
You are so worth it! You don't ever have to be a slave again. Good job and keep on keeping on!
Hugs kee kee
PS. I forgot to say (man I know how hard it is to hear this...but oh well) that time just plain ole...time...clean time....that will help you so much. I hated it when people used to say that to me, but it is so true. I know that when in the early stages of recovery...time almost stands STILL! Every moment seems an eternity! Everyday is a miracle! I will have one year on November 6th. My addiction took me to places that I never dreamed in my ugliest nightmares that I would go......five years of my life went to opiates. It is doable you and me and so many others are proof of that!
I usually post on the PP forum...however I think I have kindred spirit with y'all....I am an opiate addict period.
The changes that your brain endure while on opiates is unlike any other. It is devastating, but it is irreversible!! Those little receptors that have been growing like mad to take in all those opiates....are now left there alone and screaming.....that is why the mental phase of addiction is wicked. It truly is a "brain chemistry" thing.
I know what worked for me and that was working a program...getting therapy....and just educating myself about addiction. It has made such a difference in my life. Maybe if you get some face to face support, it will help...actually I know it will.
You are so worth it! You don't ever have to be a slave again. Good job and keep on keeping on!
Hugs kee kee
PS. I forgot to say (man I know how hard it is to hear this...but oh well) that time just plain ole...time...clean time....that will help you so much. I hated it when people used to say that to me, but it is so true. I know that when in the early stages of recovery...time almost stands STILL! Every moment seems an eternity! Everyday is a miracle! I will have one year on November 6th. My addiction took me to places that I never dreamed in my ugliest nightmares that I would go......five years of my life went to opiates. It is doable you and me and so many others are proof of that!
Hi everyone,
thank you all for taking time to read my posts and answering them,i am at 21 days today,i amtired of saying so and so days,the way i feel right now i couldnt give a sh*t how many days,all i can think of is using,and my bf who stopped the same as me is ok,he scored for us most of the time,so when he comes home for dinner,i am half hoping that he brings a score,but he doesnt,and i know i shouldnt be but i am mad on the inside,but pretend to be ok,im scared that im going to go and score by y self and lose all that mayyers to me,i know that sounds stupid,but i dont feel strong right now
seren
thank you all for taking time to read my posts and answering them,i am at 21 days today,i amtired of saying so and so days,the way i feel right now i couldnt give a sh*t how many days,all i can think of is using,and my bf who stopped the same as me is ok,he scored for us most of the time,so when he comes home for dinner,i am half hoping that he brings a score,but he doesnt,and i know i shouldnt be but i am mad on the inside,but pretend to be ok,im scared that im going to go and score by y self and lose all that mayyers to me,i know that sounds stupid,but i dont feel strong right now
seren
You got three weeks in girlfriend.............you know how fabulous that is?
You don't care........we know........seren we all felt like that too at some point.....especially at the beginning.............hey, if ya had been in a rehab ya'd still be in there.........right? You're doing awesome..........now keep going seren I swear to ya it gets better..............it does.
If you go cop then ya could get busted...........you could OD.........ya could get held up.............anything..........and then what..........where's that gonna bring ya?
Say none of that happens and ya use.........then what? You're back where yawere seren, and worse..............and your boyfriend how will he take it.......how ya know he won't be gutted.........give yourself some credit, seren.
Yeah it sucks big time............life sucks without dope..............life sucks more with it though..............you are strong...........stronger than any chick out there, seren..
STINKIN THINKIN..............that's what they call it..........what's gone on in your head..........we know it's tough, seren, but you can do this...........you ARE doing it............hang in there, honey and keep going..........forget about will he or won't he after work...............there's no more will he.........put that aside and it may get easier..........we all are behind ya, girlie..............hang in there.
You don't care........we know........seren we all felt like that too at some point.....especially at the beginning.............hey, if ya had been in a rehab ya'd still be in there.........right? You're doing awesome..........now keep going seren I swear to ya it gets better..............it does.
If you go cop then ya could get busted...........you could OD.........ya could get held up.............anything..........and then what..........where's that gonna bring ya?
Say none of that happens and ya use.........then what? You're back where yawere seren, and worse..............and your boyfriend how will he take it.......how ya know he won't be gutted.........give yourself some credit, seren.
Yeah it sucks big time............life sucks without dope..............life sucks more with it though..............you are strong...........stronger than any chick out there, seren..
STINKIN THINKIN..............that's what they call it..........what's gone on in your head..........we know it's tough, seren, but you can do this...........you ARE doing it............hang in there, honey and keep going..........forget about will he or won't he after work...............there's no more will he.........put that aside and it may get easier..........we all are behind ya, girlie..............hang in there.
hi serene,so pleased to hear you are still doing so well.with regards to your remark about it doesnt matter what the family give you ,you will still do it ,that is what my brother told me,he so wanted to give it up ,so badly ,,,,but couldnt.how do you get through this........as an addict and a helper.........how do you come together to help one another........even though he is gone i still need to understand...maybe i am in wrong place....i dont know.............sorry.
hi again serene,
i just read the other posts on here ,i dont know what page i was on when i left my last post,but i would just like to say wahooooo!!! you look and sound lke yo are doing well ...........keep it up girl...i dont come on here much..but just wanted to say good luck and take each day as it comes......big hugs ......... :)
i just read the other posts on here ,i dont know what page i was on when i left my last post,but i would just like to say wahooooo!!! you look and sound lke yo are doing well ...........keep it up girl...i dont come on here much..but just wanted to say good luck and take each day as it comes......big hugs ......... :)
thanx dutch,i am so sorry about your brother ,we all want to stop in the end but i think some can,and others cant,i know i got myself into this mess but i didnt kno how hard it would be to get myself out
i havnt used yet,but have come close manty times,i am scared that i feel im not done with it yet,i feel its not if im going to have some its when,i dont know how to change the thoughts i have everyday,does it ever go away?
seren
i havnt used yet,but have come close manty times,i am scared that i feel im not done with it yet,i feel its not if im going to have some its when,i dont know how to change the thoughts i have everyday,does it ever go away?
seren
