Well having tested the waters one too many times I have made a choice.
Today is day 1.
Yep time to stop the madness of alcohol. Ya know if there is one place where really I am an addict..... it's here. I'm physically addicted to pain pills but the psychological aspect doesn't really fit. Here I'm maybe the opposite. And I had to prove it to myself yet one more time.
When I was a teen I drank to get drunk. Today I still do. I drank alot more often when I was a teen than I do today but I rarely am in for the "taste" of it all.
In fact I am in to drink til I cannot drink anymore.
I thought I had it under wraps until the past year when twice I have just really gotten to a point where like last night I was afraid. Not of being an alcoholic but of maybe not waking up in the morning. I didn't have all that much but I felt like I was poisoned from it the entire day. I seem to have an intolerance for it. It served me well in the past few years as if I drank I always threw up but in the last year that line was taken away and now I seem to have lost all control. Once the glass is in my hand.
Of course my boyfriend does not understand all this too well. No he drinks also. I think he has a problem, he doesn't. He thinks I am much more fun, open and loving blasted. He works hard to tempt me to drink and usually I just take it and pour it down the drain. So when I told him I'm done tonite he was defensive and said as many things as he could think of as to why I don't need to stop. I'm sure the real reason is because of what's in it for him.
And so it is. I start with day 1. I know I can go years without picking up a drink. But when I do I will drink to get drunk. The real question is can I leave it behind and not pick up a drink again in this life????
Peace to you all,
PM
Hi PM,
Thats good you have decided today is the day, I know how hard it is, I put it off this time for 2 years at least!
Now im 17 days sober,
You will really find it hard having a partner that drinks and by the sounds of things encourages it when you are saying NO,
I havent been in that situation so cant coment on it.
I also drink to get drunk, I mean whats the point otherwise huh, I know I can never have 1 or 6 beers its got to be all or none, drink whats in the fridge then go to the pub, crazy stuff and a waste of money,
I live in Australia where alcohol is a big part of social life, my psycologist has told me to stay away from places where I have drunk before, That is nearly impossble to do unless I move to another city,
Enough rambling by me,
Take each day as it comes, it does get easier eventually,
I wish you luck, hope u keep posting here, as i come on everyday, It helps me, but when Im on all you guys on the other side of the worls are sleeping!
Bye Ginge
Thats good you have decided today is the day, I know how hard it is, I put it off this time for 2 years at least!
Now im 17 days sober,
You will really find it hard having a partner that drinks and by the sounds of things encourages it when you are saying NO,
I havent been in that situation so cant coment on it.
I also drink to get drunk, I mean whats the point otherwise huh, I know I can never have 1 or 6 beers its got to be all or none, drink whats in the fridge then go to the pub, crazy stuff and a waste of money,
I live in Australia where alcohol is a big part of social life, my psycologist has told me to stay away from places where I have drunk before, That is nearly impossble to do unless I move to another city,
Enough rambling by me,
Take each day as it comes, it does get easier eventually,
I wish you luck, hope u keep posting here, as i come on everyday, It helps me, but when Im on all you guys on the other side of the worls are sleeping!
Bye Ginge
Ginge,
You made me smile when you said "what's the point....." I wonder if anyone really truly like the taste of alcohol. My bf swears he likes the taste of whisky. He may have 100 different bottles and they all taste the same to me! Crappy!
17 days is great. I congradulate you. For me to quit is really an easy thing. It's not my way of life, I don't pick it up that often. The thing is though I might not drink for a year and then presto I will drink one day and get plowed. So here is the problem as I see it. I don't have a stopping point.
You are in a tougher situation when it is part of your lifestyle. I do understand that. You will be alright though. I think you sound strong and that's great.
My boyfriend tells me he is not an alcoholic but I do know if I leave and come back he drinks every single day. I use to smell it on his breath when I saw him at his work. It was that old smell from the night before. Eventually, I began to not question it anymore. I must have just gotten use to it. He really doesn't support me in stopping. It is not however, his life. So I will do what I need to and really take some time to rethink my situation with him.
Anyway, it's nice to meet you. Thanks for your reply.
Peace,
PM
You made me smile when you said "what's the point....." I wonder if anyone really truly like the taste of alcohol. My bf swears he likes the taste of whisky. He may have 100 different bottles and they all taste the same to me! Crappy!
17 days is great. I congradulate you. For me to quit is really an easy thing. It's not my way of life, I don't pick it up that often. The thing is though I might not drink for a year and then presto I will drink one day and get plowed. So here is the problem as I see it. I don't have a stopping point.
You are in a tougher situation when it is part of your lifestyle. I do understand that. You will be alright though. I think you sound strong and that's great.
My boyfriend tells me he is not an alcoholic but I do know if I leave and come back he drinks every single day. I use to smell it on his breath when I saw him at his work. It was that old smell from the night before. Eventually, I began to not question it anymore. I must have just gotten use to it. He really doesn't support me in stopping. It is not however, his life. So I will do what I need to and really take some time to rethink my situation with him.
Anyway, it's nice to meet you. Thanks for your reply.
Peace,
PM
Hi PM,
Was good to get home from work and have a reply! Thank you,
You are right alcohol is a BIG part of my lifestyle, like if im not working im drinking, well not for a few weeks now,
I have tied myself up in work to keep occupied, but no work this weekend so finish work friday arvo and dont go back till monday nite!
Usally that would be drinking friday, sat morning through to sat nite, crash then all day sunday, What am I going to do with myself!
I will find something to do, maybe get back into bike riding,
You are lucky to be able to stop just like that, so what brings it on after a year?
I understand the dont know when to stop, thats like when I drop!
You are right you may need to reaccess your situation with ur b/f,
I hope it all works out for you, you are thinking on the right track,
Do you live in USA?
well in off to bed now, early get up in morning 2.30am!
Hope to hear from u again soon,
Here is my email if you feel like typing away,
gingeginge@hotmail.com
Bye take care
Ginge
Was good to get home from work and have a reply! Thank you,
You are right alcohol is a BIG part of my lifestyle, like if im not working im drinking, well not for a few weeks now,
I have tied myself up in work to keep occupied, but no work this weekend so finish work friday arvo and dont go back till monday nite!
Usally that would be drinking friday, sat morning through to sat nite, crash then all day sunday, What am I going to do with myself!
I will find something to do, maybe get back into bike riding,
You are lucky to be able to stop just like that, so what brings it on after a year?
I understand the dont know when to stop, thats like when I drop!
You are right you may need to reaccess your situation with ur b/f,
I hope it all works out for you, you are thinking on the right track,
Do you live in USA?
well in off to bed now, early get up in morning 2.30am!
Hope to hear from u again soon,
Here is my email if you feel like typing away,
gingeginge@hotmail.com
Bye take care
Ginge
Hey Ginge,
I'm really proud of you for quitting. Keep hanging in there. I think you are looking and seeing other things you can do and you will find you stride in that and be happy. You are definately worth it.
Ya know I guess for me it's great I can stop and also a bit of an illusion really.
Because it's like I can go a year without a drink and I won't be too bothered by it. Unless everyone around me is drunk! (smile) Then all the sudden I have a drink. Sometimes I can have just one or two. But that's rare. More often I will keep drinking and drinking. One second I am fine the next I am blasted. And there is no stopping or being able to distinguish whether this time I will get blasted or not. Although the more I don't drink inbetween, the more I guess I am finding myself drunk.
After a certain point I just black out. When I was a teen I was like this. A binge drinker without the ability to stop. For awhile recently when I began to approach my cutoff point I would get sick. So that was incentive not to drink. But that doesn't happen anymore. So it's time to stop. Because after all that I just feel toxic for a couple of days.
So I'm living in the US. So we are on opposite time schedules. I'm really glad you have stopped. You are doing great. I know it's not easy when you are around it all the time. Please don't tell me you work in a bar! LOL I'm kidding ya some.
Take care,
PM
I'm really proud of you for quitting. Keep hanging in there. I think you are looking and seeing other things you can do and you will find you stride in that and be happy. You are definately worth it.
Ya know I guess for me it's great I can stop and also a bit of an illusion really.
Because it's like I can go a year without a drink and I won't be too bothered by it. Unless everyone around me is drunk! (smile) Then all the sudden I have a drink. Sometimes I can have just one or two. But that's rare. More often I will keep drinking and drinking. One second I am fine the next I am blasted. And there is no stopping or being able to distinguish whether this time I will get blasted or not. Although the more I don't drink inbetween, the more I guess I am finding myself drunk.
After a certain point I just black out. When I was a teen I was like this. A binge drinker without the ability to stop. For awhile recently when I began to approach my cutoff point I would get sick. So that was incentive not to drink. But that doesn't happen anymore. So it's time to stop. Because after all that I just feel toxic for a couple of days.
So I'm living in the US. So we are on opposite time schedules. I'm really glad you have stopped. You are doing great. I know it's not easy when you are around it all the time. Please don't tell me you work in a bar! LOL I'm kidding ya some.
Take care,
PM
Hi Things are going good for me down here,
I am up to day 22! and dont even feel like drinking.....thanks to the medication im on, that helps take away the cravings,
How are you PM? Havent heard from you in a while?
On saturday I went on a bike ride 250 m/cycles all up they have 5 stops all pubs!
I drunk coke then water, and was suprised to look around and see how many others were drinking the same, wasnt that hard to do, suprisingly enough,
Hope everyone one is doing okay,
Take care
Ginge
I am up to day 22! and dont even feel like drinking.....thanks to the medication im on, that helps take away the cravings,
How are you PM? Havent heard from you in a while?
On saturday I went on a bike ride 250 m/cycles all up they have 5 stops all pubs!
I drunk coke then water, and was suprised to look around and see how many others were drinking the same, wasnt that hard to do, suprisingly enough,
Hope everyone one is doing okay,
Take care
Ginge
