So my partner and I have been dating for 2.5 years. When i first starting dating he said he does weed instead of other drugs he use to do to suppress his cravings.
1 year into our relationship I found a crackpipe in his car. Ever since then he confessed- he's been doing it in front of me every night. He works 12 hour shifts 6 days a week doing construction and says he takes meth to keep sane.
When hes on it, its like i dont exist. He comes home from work and straight away smokes and cleans the pipe till 5:30am in the morning till he leaves for work. Meanin he never sleeps and never eats. I'm worried and feel lost because its like i dont exist or something, i hardly see him during the day and while hes home, hes obssessed over the meth. He's easily angered and says really random things when high. he admits he's weak and is cutting down but says he takes it for hours bc he can control himself unlike other meth users who take it in a couple of minutes.
How do i handle the situation? we always fight because whenever I wake up in the middle of the night and see him standing in the corner just on his phone doing deals or smoking, I give him s*** for not sleeping and taking it...
It's a bummer that your going through this with your boyfriend. I don't mean to sound harsh but why have you settled for this type of treatment?? You can't change your boyfriend but you can change yourself. Is it financial? Can you not afford a place on your own so you put up with his meth use? Just want to put it out there that meth is against the law. Since you live with him your guilty by association. Are you willing to accept that? I too had a boyfriend that was doing meth. I would get mad at him over and over. He just got more sneaky. One night he came home and I was complaining about his use once again. He came at me and strangled me. After a long struggle I escaped called the police and he was arrested. He never came back after that night he went to jail for 18 months. So after all this you would think I wouldn't want him back but I did. When he got out we started seeing each other again. I noticed he was acting different again. After several weeks I decided I liked my life better without him. He had went back to meth use. My point is that I changed. I wasn't willing to have that type of relationship anymore. I had to get honest with myself. He did meth without you and he is able to get clean without you. But you need to decide what you want out of this relationship?? You can't do it for him. I went to counseling and victims of abuse meetings through woman's space. I got healthy and then I was able to set boundaries. I hope you find the answers you need for this difficult time. My thoughts are with you.......peace
You have to get out.
I was beat so bad that I had to wear long pants, jackets, and caked on makeup in the South Florida summer. This happened repeatedly, I didn't leave.
I was dangled off a 23rd-floor balcony, I didn't leave.
I was threatened to have a brick tied around my ankle and thrown into the river.
I finally left. He's now in prison. It was a low point in my life and I look back on it now in disgust, but it was a learning experience.
Meth and crack make people into something they're not. He may tell you he loves you every day when he's clean. But the second he smokes, you don't matter.
Leaving is hard. But unless he gets help and is serious about it, odds are it's going to escalate. Is this really what you want for your life?
I was beat so bad that I had to wear long pants, jackets, and caked on makeup in the South Florida summer. This happened repeatedly, I didn't leave.
I was dangled off a 23rd-floor balcony, I didn't leave.
I was threatened to have a brick tied around my ankle and thrown into the river.
I finally left. He's now in prison. It was a low point in my life and I look back on it now in disgust, but it was a learning experience.
Meth and crack make people into something they're not. He may tell you he loves you every day when he's clean. But the second he smokes, you don't matter.
Leaving is hard. But unless he gets help and is serious about it, odds are it's going to escalate. Is this really what you want for your life?
That is so sad. You need to get out fast. My son is 21 and was on heroin, meth, etc. He wasn't my son anymore. He has been to 14 rehabs and currently in the 14th....leaving Friday to live in a sober living. Bottom line, no matter how much you love him, you cannot fix him. This will be a lifetime struggle. Good Luck to you!
Hugs and Prayers
Paula
Hugs and Prayers
Paula
I do love him alot and his family is trying to help him as well, but confrontation will make him violent. He defends the drug saying the processed food and alcohol we consume is just as worse..
We are trying to get our own rental, but he keeps spending like $300 here and there on the stuff.
He literally will fire up if I mention rehab or any sort of help, his family says that him gettin caught will teach him a lesson.
We broke up for 3 months and all he did was sleep with this stupid little girl and was on meth 24/7 really bad, thats what his dad said. When we got back together he was 10x better. I always thought i could help him but thats when i was naive about the drug.
We are trying to get our own rental, but he keeps spending like $300 here and there on the stuff.
He literally will fire up if I mention rehab or any sort of help, his family says that him gettin caught will teach him a lesson.
We broke up for 3 months and all he did was sleep with this stupid little girl and was on meth 24/7 really bad, thats what his dad said. When we got back together he was 10x better. I always thought i could help him but thats when i was naive about the drug.
I forgot to mention that I'm an addict in recovery. I'm 28 and have 4 years clean. Speaking from experience, he's using you and manipulating you. It's crazy to hear it from the other side just how good us addicts can be at it.
You're enabling him. It's hard to hear, but if you let this continue you're not only sacrificing your own peace, but you're continuing to let the person you love kill themselves.
I KNOW it's easier said than done. But you can't live like this. I know you love him, but are you happy? Is this what you think you deserve? Can you ever imagine a nice vacation together? Where do you see your relationship in five years?
You're enabling him. It's hard to hear, but if you let this continue you're not only sacrificing your own peace, but you're continuing to let the person you love kill themselves.
I KNOW it's easier said than done. But you can't live like this. I know you love him, but are you happy? Is this what you think you deserve? Can you ever imagine a nice vacation together? Where do you see your relationship in five years?
leave asap. there is no reasoning. are you there to just watch him and be a baby sitter. there's no relationship. whatever you try to talk about he gets angry. it is his way of stopping the discussion.
this is no life for you. do not rent a place with him. you will be stuck with him longer and harder to get out of and / or you will be stuck paying for it by yourself.
this is no life for you. do not rent a place with him. you will be stuck with him longer and harder to get out of and / or you will be stuck paying for it by yourself.
