Hi Everyone
My daughter moved out of home at 19 with her boyfriend. She is now 20 and has been living with him for 12 months. We have only just found out after she disclosed to her little sister and swore her to secrecy that she has tried LSD and plans to do mushrooms and MDMA (Ecstasy) next.
We have since learned (from expressing our concern to him and our daughter) that he has been doing LSD and mushrooms for 3 years. He said it is only a couple of times a year (to get close to nature) but already we know (from our daughters disclosures to her sisters) that she alone has tried LSD 4 times (although when asked - she only admits to twice). He says he has a testing kit to be safe. She advises that she has done her research and can't see any harm. She denies that she told her sister that she wants to try MDMA.
I could have bet my house that out of our three daughters that this particular daughter would not be the one to even try drugs. She has had ups and a lot of downs with this boyfriend being emotionally unavailable and I can't help think she is doing this to get closer to him.
I am petrified the due to her complex nature, health issues and mental health that even if he is not addicted, that she will become addicted. I know I am in a state of fear but don't know what to do about it.
Many thanks in advance for your thoughts
Welcome Aqua71!
We are moving your post to Families/Partners of Addicts, where people with similar situations can share their stories and get feedback.
- the moderators
We are moving your post to Families/Partners of Addicts, where people with similar situations can share their stories and get feedback.
- the moderators
Aqua,
I can imagine your shock and panic. I dont know what the best advice is. Keep the topic open but not too much talk that makes her stop talking to you. Find ways to tell her this is her decision, you know it something people do, but that does not make it a good thing to do. And you are very concerned and fear something bad might happen when under influence of these drugs.
And that it might not be good for her. Recreational drug use can trigger psychological breaks from reality, that may or may not become permanent. Let her know your home is always open for her. Be prepared for a possible medical crisis event, her or her boyfriend.
Are they both working or going to school and paying their own bills. If so keep it that way, do not start paying their bills, etc
Keep educating yourself. Internet, utube, etc.
I can imagine your shock and panic. I dont know what the best advice is. Keep the topic open but not too much talk that makes her stop talking to you. Find ways to tell her this is her decision, you know it something people do, but that does not make it a good thing to do. And you are very concerned and fear something bad might happen when under influence of these drugs.
And that it might not be good for her. Recreational drug use can trigger psychological breaks from reality, that may or may not become permanent. Let her know your home is always open for her. Be prepared for a possible medical crisis event, her or her boyfriend.
Are they both working or going to school and paying their own bills. If so keep it that way, do not start paying their bills, etc
Keep educating yourself. Internet, utube, etc.
Hi Aqua
Can I call you mom? Because I like to call all the good mom's , mom! Anywhoo, as a addict myself. Not to psychedelics, even though I have done shrooms, acid , ecstasy and I haven't done that other stuff like MDMA or bath salts (or at least I don't think I have). But , it's one thing that I know, when I was starting out with the whole "trying out new things" . I didn't like talking to my mom about it because she would always tell me things that I didn't want to hear. Even if she was right or not, I still didn't want to hear what she had to say. Also because I grew up resenting My mom because she was never there for me and chose her friends and drug use over me. I didn't start a relationship with her until I was 30/ anywhoo, but I always found it a lot better for me to talk to someone who's been in my shoes rather then someone who was only talking to me by what other ppl had taught them about drugs. So maybe if you know someone who has dabbled in drugs but is sober now and that can relate to what she is going through. You know, like a female who was in a relationship like hers. Then maybe that might go through her head a lil but more easily and maybe she could relate and understand because someone can also understand and relate to what she is going threw. Possibly someone who had it bad in they're dope days. Maybe hit rock bottom and that's why theyre sober now. Well, I don't know. It's just a thought. I'm sorry I'm no real help. But keep coming back here, you'll feel better to get all that crap off of your chest.! Good luck.
Can I call you mom? Because I like to call all the good mom's , mom! Anywhoo, as a addict myself. Not to psychedelics, even though I have done shrooms, acid , ecstasy and I haven't done that other stuff like MDMA or bath salts (or at least I don't think I have). But , it's one thing that I know, when I was starting out with the whole "trying out new things" . I didn't like talking to my mom about it because she would always tell me things that I didn't want to hear. Even if she was right or not, I still didn't want to hear what she had to say. Also because I grew up resenting My mom because she was never there for me and chose her friends and drug use over me. I didn't start a relationship with her until I was 30/ anywhoo, but I always found it a lot better for me to talk to someone who's been in my shoes rather then someone who was only talking to me by what other ppl had taught them about drugs. So maybe if you know someone who has dabbled in drugs but is sober now and that can relate to what she is going through. You know, like a female who was in a relationship like hers. Then maybe that might go through her head a lil but more easily and maybe she could relate and understand because someone can also understand and relate to what she is going threw. Possibly someone who had it bad in they're dope days. Maybe hit rock bottom and that's why theyre sober now. Well, I don't know. It's just a thought. I'm sorry I'm no real help. But keep coming back here, you'll feel better to get all that crap off of your chest.! Good luck.
