Had a big argument with my 21 yr old son last night. All about this psycho girlfriend of his. She looked thru my fridge & cabinets and told me that I should keep more food in the house - Justin(my-kid) has only cheese to eat.
I told her it was out of line to look thru my kitchen & Justin is 21 ,if he gets hungry he has a job & a car- he knows how to shop.
My kid sided with her, I overreacted- Now he left with her this morning. No call- he,s not answering his phone
The kid must be thinking with the little head & not the big head-
I figure he is an adult , he will come to his senses. But it does hurt to be abandoned again.
1st Sandy -now my kid
Whats happening here?-
bummed,
jack
Jack,
You are never alone! Sorry for the HJ but not being a parent I can still imagine how hurtful it must be at times....the best to you always!
You are never alone! Sorry for the HJ but not being a parent I can still imagine how hurtful it must be at times....the best to you always!
Jack, what's happening is right............I don't think you OVER reacted......ya just reacted and it is justifiable.
O.K. I may be out of line like that chick, but these girls are like something out of hell anymore............not all of them, but they are bossy and disrespectful.
They all got a chip on their shoulder...........and I used to think people treat us the way we treat them..............that don't fly anymore.
In defense of your son...........I always figure..........he's a dude........he's sleeping with her...........of c ourse he'll take her side............in that respect I always have sided with the boys..........and that other head.
Jack, you have been going through so much in the last few months...........huge changes...........and all not at your own hand..........in fact none of them.
Da*n these kids...........I know you are worried about him now..........and I can understand ya feel abandoned...........I mean ya only raised the boy.......lived for the kid.............now he don't answer his phone........you're pent up and anguished and no doubt he's well ya know with his girl.
What's going on here is we have to LIVE............oh I can just here this chicklett right now dissing you.............what's she think ya live in a shelter.........how's about she bring over some groceries knowing your household has gone through big changes.
Honestly that was out of line.............I'd like to say she wasn't raised right that chick.........I mean can you imagine if we did that back in the day.........NEVER!
Man, I never even opened my ex husbands parents fridge when we were married unless asked to.........or when helping to clear the table and stuff.
BUT alas, I raised my daughter right..........even high.........maybe that's a stretch, but my parents did as well.............heck, even my daughter I don't think would do that..............but we can't anymore guess at how these kids got raised up cause it's a new world..........I know I sound the biotch, but it is hwat it all is.
You're not abandoned like GYAC said............ya got us..........I'll get on the train and come and meet ya............we can be posers and go to MOMA and pretend we know art..........or go see that Beattles thing that The Dark Horse........what's her name........the paramour of Harrison/Clapton pained for......she came out with her photography.........LIVE.........show em all.........you want cheese in the fridge.........LOL.........how about ya get a bag of Dorito's............cause Papa is gonna go midlife crisis on your azzz's.....how's about that.
Bottom line is like I always say...............I coined this.........even my Family Doctor says he wants to get a tattoo of my saying:
"POWER OF THE COOCHIE"............it rules most men...........he didn't chose, Jack............coochie power.........makes a fella do starange things.
Just trying to make ya a little lighter..........I'm actually so sorry and it hurts........sooooooooooooooo bad.........sooooooooo soooooooooo bad.......to not even be answered or get this one...........TEXT ME: "Hey, what's up?"
TEXT DAUGHTER: "NOne of your business"...............TEXT ME: "Well just saying hello, and thinking of you"..........TEXT DAUGHTER: NOTHING!!!!!!!!
NOTHING NOTHING NOTHING.................I'm bitter and that's bad........and I went to bed at 8:00AM on a Friday night.............saying to myself "WHY did I quit drugs? WHY? For what? I'd have got more respect if I stayed on them or I'd be checked out of this life by now".
Just what ya needed to hear..............we all are with ya, Jack..........it ain't the same I know, but hey join the pi*ssed parent club..........he'll be home and soon will tire of her nagging about cheese.............what's that about?......I'd like to give that little sugar cube some lessons in class and ettiquette......cause ya know I am such a lady...........sending ya the warmest hug..........it gotta get better, and anyway ya got your mom to wait on........LOL.......like me.
O.K. I may be out of line like that chick, but these girls are like something out of hell anymore............not all of them, but they are bossy and disrespectful.
They all got a chip on their shoulder...........and I used to think people treat us the way we treat them..............that don't fly anymore.
In defense of your son...........I always figure..........he's a dude........he's sleeping with her...........of c ourse he'll take her side............in that respect I always have sided with the boys..........and that other head.
Jack, you have been going through so much in the last few months...........huge changes...........and all not at your own hand..........in fact none of them.
Da*n these kids...........I know you are worried about him now..........and I can understand ya feel abandoned...........I mean ya only raised the boy.......lived for the kid.............now he don't answer his phone........you're pent up and anguished and no doubt he's well ya know with his girl.
What's going on here is we have to LIVE............oh I can just here this chicklett right now dissing you.............what's she think ya live in a shelter.........how's about she bring over some groceries knowing your household has gone through big changes.
Honestly that was out of line.............I'd like to say she wasn't raised right that chick.........I mean can you imagine if we did that back in the day.........NEVER!
Man, I never even opened my ex husbands parents fridge when we were married unless asked to.........or when helping to clear the table and stuff.
BUT alas, I raised my daughter right..........even high.........maybe that's a stretch, but my parents did as well.............heck, even my daughter I don't think would do that..............but we can't anymore guess at how these kids got raised up cause it's a new world..........I know I sound the biotch, but it is hwat it all is.
You're not abandoned like GYAC said............ya got us..........I'll get on the train and come and meet ya............we can be posers and go to MOMA and pretend we know art..........or go see that Beattles thing that The Dark Horse........what's her name........the paramour of Harrison/Clapton pained for......she came out with her photography.........LIVE.........show em all.........you want cheese in the fridge.........LOL.........how about ya get a bag of Dorito's............cause Papa is gonna go midlife crisis on your azzz's.....how's about that.
Bottom line is like I always say...............I coined this.........even my Family Doctor says he wants to get a tattoo of my saying:
"POWER OF THE COOCHIE"............it rules most men...........he didn't chose, Jack............coochie power.........makes a fella do starange things.
Just trying to make ya a little lighter..........I'm actually so sorry and it hurts........sooooooooooooooo bad.........sooooooooo soooooooooo bad.......to not even be answered or get this one...........TEXT ME: "Hey, what's up?"
TEXT DAUGHTER: "NOne of your business"...............TEXT ME: "Well just saying hello, and thinking of you"..........TEXT DAUGHTER: NOTHING!!!!!!!!
NOTHING NOTHING NOTHING.................I'm bitter and that's bad........and I went to bed at 8:00AM on a Friday night.............saying to myself "WHY did I quit drugs? WHY? For what? I'd have got more respect if I stayed on them or I'd be checked out of this life by now".
Just what ya needed to hear..............we all are with ya, Jack..........it ain't the same I know, but hey join the pi*ssed parent club..........he'll be home and soon will tire of her nagging about cheese.............what's that about?......I'd like to give that little sugar cube some lessons in class and ettiquette......cause ya know I am such a lady...........sending ya the warmest hug..........it gotta get better, and anyway ya got your mom to wait on........LOL.......like me.
Jack, so sorry your boy's being a doofus. Isn't silly that it all started over such a small thing? Like, how was that her business anyways? You are absolutely right, and I had the same conversation with my girl before she moved out...no one needs to hungry here, we don't exactly live in the sticks that you can't find yourself a burger or a bag a of groceries.
But that doesn't change how you feel...he's hurt you. But he'll be back and probably acting like nothing unusual happened, cause that's how they are.
Hope things take a turn for you soon, Jack.
Peace~MomNMore
But that doesn't change how you feel...he's hurt you. But he'll be back and probably acting like nothing unusual happened, cause that's how they are.
Hope things take a turn for you soon, Jack.
Peace~MomNMore
Jack,
You'll be up soon..............know we all care and have been there.
It sure does hurt...........let us know how it went, O.K.?
BTW, how did you OVER react? Like did ya start breaking dishes and scream "Who are you the food cupboard inspector? What's in your fridge and cabinets?"...............did ya throw your hands up in the air and run in circles screaming "NO NO NO NO"?
LOL............that's what my nephew told me my brother has been doing.....LOL
Then they're all like "See everyone in the family is crazy, Annie it's just you're the one gets pegged with the title Nut-Nut".
Thinking of ya Jack. Hey, if need be just blame the full moon!
You'll be up soon..............know we all care and have been there.
It sure does hurt...........let us know how it went, O.K.?
BTW, how did you OVER react? Like did ya start breaking dishes and scream "Who are you the food cupboard inspector? What's in your fridge and cabinets?"...............did ya throw your hands up in the air and run in circles screaming "NO NO NO NO"?
LOL............that's what my nephew told me my brother has been doing.....LOL
Then they're all like "See everyone in the family is crazy, Annie it's just you're the one gets pegged with the title Nut-Nut".
Thinking of ya Jack. Hey, if need be just blame the full moon!
Jack, you done the right thing, what gives her the right to look through your house without your permission? Yeah he most prob is thinking with the little head. You're his dad, he will come round. Take care, Kev
Hope Jack didn't find that little chicklett and tell her about it.
Ya know why? Cause when I find her I'm gonna take out my earrings and kick off my shoes and beat her down like the........................................"
Oh wait, no, no I would never. That's a Jerrry Springer episode.
Hope you're alright Jack. I thought ya would have been on this morning.
Ya know why? Cause when I find her I'm gonna take out my earrings and kick off my shoes and beat her down like the........................................"
Oh wait, no, no I would never. That's a Jerrry Springer episode.
Hope you're alright Jack. I thought ya would have been on this morning.
~ Alert to all members of the Pissed off Parent's Club ~
The brains' frontal lobe isn't fully developed until the age of 25.
Suggestion of the month ~ Sign on your front door....all ye who enter must have fully developed frontal lobe. I respect your brains contents (or lack thereof), please respect my house contents (or lack thereof).
The brains' frontal lobe isn't fully developed until the age of 25.
Suggestion of the month ~ Sign on your front door....all ye who enter must have fully developed frontal lobe. I respect your brains contents (or lack thereof), please respect my house contents (or lack thereof).
WW
thats a funny line.
Bryn
No ,not a call- not a text- not an e-mail - nada.
Now his grandmother,my mom, downstairs is asking all kinds of questions. "What did I do? Why did my son storm out & why isnt he calling?"
I tell her I didnt do anything- I just got defensive(OK maybe ,I got loud & angry)
I told her this little girl has got Justin on a short leash ,and she thinks she can run the show here. - With Sandy absent- maybe she thinks she is in line to be the woman of the house. Oh ,how wrong she is.
My mom doesnt care what happened , she just want to know her grandson is OK-. We both know that with his bills,and the job he has ,he cant possibly live anywhere like he does here.
Maybe he needs to see for himself- -but this isnt the way.
bummed at midnight,
jack
thats a funny line.
Bryn
No ,not a call- not a text- not an e-mail - nada.
Now his grandmother,my mom, downstairs is asking all kinds of questions. "What did I do? Why did my son storm out & why isnt he calling?"
I tell her I didnt do anything- I just got defensive(OK maybe ,I got loud & angry)
I told her this little girl has got Justin on a short leash ,and she thinks she can run the show here. - With Sandy absent- maybe she thinks she is in line to be the woman of the house. Oh ,how wrong she is.
My mom doesnt care what happened , she just want to know her grandson is OK-. We both know that with his bills,and the job he has ,he cant possibly live anywhere like he does here.
Maybe he needs to see for himself- -but this isnt the way.
bummed at midnight,
jack
Oh GREAT. JUst GREAT. Now your mom is in on it. Jack, let me tell ya I am feeling for ya. I'm so sorry. That's a pain like no other when your own child who you are concerned about don't call or text or anything.
CONTROL!
That's what that is all about. Ya know too, you may be right about this little chicklett. She just may have been thinking that Sandy isn't there so of course ya need a woman to control the kitchen and everything else.
Hmmmmmmm, quite intrusive if I must say so myself. Of course I can't say for sure cause I am not there, but a lil whipped I'd say. Hey, he's 21. You know the power that thingie wields us girls got. Especially on a 21 year old guy.
Sorry if that was not ladylike. I think I speak the truth.
Now, your mom is worried. Just great. Well, see in that instance that is so what I'd be mad at. He can be mad at you, but he should be letting his gram know he is O.K.
Jack, so what? Ya got angry. Is it a wonder? Some little puddin pop looking through your cabinets and yapping how there's nothing in there for the kid you been feeding for how long now? If you told us ya karate chopped her butt that'd be a different story.
I'm sorry, Jack. I hope he at least calls. Hope your mom is alright.
******Oh don't ya love "What did YOU do?" My mom and even my dad used to do the same exact thing. Like, of course it was all ME!!!!! I did it. I made her act like some wretch or made her sad because I corrected her. Grandparents are just different, but it really makes ya think. Like "Man, if my little girlfriend of that age went through my mom's cabinets how would she have reacted?*************
Can he be staying at her parents house?
CONTROL!
That's what that is all about. Ya know too, you may be right about this little chicklett. She just may have been thinking that Sandy isn't there so of course ya need a woman to control the kitchen and everything else.
Hmmmmmmm, quite intrusive if I must say so myself. Of course I can't say for sure cause I am not there, but a lil whipped I'd say. Hey, he's 21. You know the power that thingie wields us girls got. Especially on a 21 year old guy.
Sorry if that was not ladylike. I think I speak the truth.
Now, your mom is worried. Just great. Well, see in that instance that is so what I'd be mad at. He can be mad at you, but he should be letting his gram know he is O.K.
Jack, so what? Ya got angry. Is it a wonder? Some little puddin pop looking through your cabinets and yapping how there's nothing in there for the kid you been feeding for how long now? If you told us ya karate chopped her butt that'd be a different story.
I'm sorry, Jack. I hope he at least calls. Hope your mom is alright.
******Oh don't ya love "What did YOU do?" My mom and even my dad used to do the same exact thing. Like, of course it was all ME!!!!! I did it. I made her act like some wretch or made her sad because I corrected her. Grandparents are just different, but it really makes ya think. Like "Man, if my little girlfriend of that age went through my mom's cabinets how would she have reacted?*************
Can he be staying at her parents house?
Jack, Hang on.
It's got to get better. Something has to be coming up, better.
You're going through it.
It's got to get better. Something has to be coming up, better.
You're going through it.
So my kid shows up yesterday to help his gram ma clean out the garage while I was at work. He says he has moved in with his mother for awhile. Can you believe this sh*t. This is a woman who doesn't even know him.
I guess he always had "mother" issues , but man ,to think living with this alcoholic is going to be a better deal is crazy. Maybe he thinks he can help her?
He always said that he didn't like that I was on methadone- -wait till he gets a load of alcohol. She doesn't drive,hasnt worked in 20 years, sucks the system out of every dollar she can.- God knows what disability she is using these days.
But- apparently its going to be all good over there .Wait till he has to pay the bills (his and 1/2 of hers) that he never did over here.
He still hasn't called- I'm just getting second hand information from my mother.
I guess his wacky girlfriend will be the next to go over there. She will have to drive about 12 miles in traffic every night to get there- -she only had a 5 minute drive from her house to mine. Now she'll have to really commute .
- The area where the ex-wife lives is about 5 minutes away from the Lincoln Tunnel(connecting NJ to midtown Manhattan)- So traffic is always intense- & him & his g/f aren't used to that at all. He works around the corner from here so now he,ll have to get up an hour earlier and commute with all the other nuts on the road.
I guessing that he will last over there a couple of weeks. In a way,maybe its good that he get out & see for himself that the world is not the warm comfy place that he thinks it is. I just wish it didnt happen like this. I also hope that he steers clear of trouble- -I know at 21 he is an adult but he was kind of spoiled a bit growing up-as me & my parents overcompensated for his wacky mother.-or- lack of a mother ,I should say...
He has a 24 year old step-brother who lives there (sometimes). When I married his mother ,she had a 3 year old. So now he can get to know him too.
What a joke- both of these people had nothing to do with my kid for the last 15 years except for some phone calls and birthday cards. His step-brother is another story. He can be trouble. He already has a drunk driving ticket & has been unemployed for who knows how long. I worry just as much about his influence as hers.
OK- Im making this way too long- - Ill use you guys & this board as therapy ,but now I gotta try and get back to sleep. This sh*t keeps me up at night.
peacetoall
jack
I guess he always had "mother" issues , but man ,to think living with this alcoholic is going to be a better deal is crazy. Maybe he thinks he can help her?
He always said that he didn't like that I was on methadone- -wait till he gets a load of alcohol. She doesn't drive,hasnt worked in 20 years, sucks the system out of every dollar she can.- God knows what disability she is using these days.
But- apparently its going to be all good over there .Wait till he has to pay the bills (his and 1/2 of hers) that he never did over here.
He still hasn't called- I'm just getting second hand information from my mother.
I guess his wacky girlfriend will be the next to go over there. She will have to drive about 12 miles in traffic every night to get there- -she only had a 5 minute drive from her house to mine. Now she'll have to really commute .
- The area where the ex-wife lives is about 5 minutes away from the Lincoln Tunnel(connecting NJ to midtown Manhattan)- So traffic is always intense- & him & his g/f aren't used to that at all. He works around the corner from here so now he,ll have to get up an hour earlier and commute with all the other nuts on the road.
I guessing that he will last over there a couple of weeks. In a way,maybe its good that he get out & see for himself that the world is not the warm comfy place that he thinks it is. I just wish it didnt happen like this. I also hope that he steers clear of trouble- -I know at 21 he is an adult but he was kind of spoiled a bit growing up-as me & my parents overcompensated for his wacky mother.-or- lack of a mother ,I should say...
He has a 24 year old step-brother who lives there (sometimes). When I married his mother ,she had a 3 year old. So now he can get to know him too.
What a joke- both of these people had nothing to do with my kid for the last 15 years except for some phone calls and birthday cards. His step-brother is another story. He can be trouble. He already has a drunk driving ticket & has been unemployed for who knows how long. I worry just as much about his influence as hers.
OK- Im making this way too long- - Ill use you guys & this board as therapy ,but now I gotta try and get back to sleep. This sh*t keeps me up at night.
peacetoall
jack
What the h*ll? WHAT??????????
Jack, this is a major stress. It hurts and it makes one freaking mad as all get out. I mean are our kids related?. This is almost like EXACTLY the situation with my daughter and I. She gets raised up for SEVENTEEN YEARS here at home. Gets everything and anything she wanted from my parents all those years. Then POOF just walks out because of an argument?
Jack, don't get shocked out your shorts when ya finally do speak with him and he makes it like "mommy" is doing him a big favor. It may come out that he thinks mommy is just top dog and he's devoted and grateful to her.
Just a warning because like my daughter said to me "He took me in". Thank God I am in counseling because what I wanted to say is "He's your da*n father. Took ya in? So, I guess ya should be grateful to mom-mom, Poppy and me for 17 long years of taking ya in ya little ingrate".
Also, Jack these kids can be stubborn and we too thought this kid will be back in a week tops. It'll be a year on November 3rd. It's all about "I'll show YOU".
Ya know you are right it may be about the mother issues. So, what that gives him the ammunition needed not to call the man who raised him? The father who has been through everything and anything with him?
If this didn't happen to me I'd swear ya did something criminal to the kid. Alas, I know this is the total opposite. You do the right thing and off they go. BUT, just not even calling you. Uggghhhhhghghghhhhhh, live with me for all these years and then just don't even let me know you are safe.
He's wrong and my daughter is wrong. It hurts like hell. I'm starting to think my mom is right. Get your own life and forget about her. I know it's not able to be done, but maybe we can give it a try at least. Just a try.
That so stinks. I'm so sorry, Jack. Ain't it seem like almost a joke or a dream? Unbelievable. GOOD, can't wait till she puts her palm out. I'm really feeling for ya Jack. I am so sorry.
Jack, this is a major stress. It hurts and it makes one freaking mad as all get out. I mean are our kids related?. This is almost like EXACTLY the situation with my daughter and I. She gets raised up for SEVENTEEN YEARS here at home. Gets everything and anything she wanted from my parents all those years. Then POOF just walks out because of an argument?
Jack, don't get shocked out your shorts when ya finally do speak with him and he makes it like "mommy" is doing him a big favor. It may come out that he thinks mommy is just top dog and he's devoted and grateful to her.
Just a warning because like my daughter said to me "He took me in". Thank God I am in counseling because what I wanted to say is "He's your da*n father. Took ya in? So, I guess ya should be grateful to mom-mom, Poppy and me for 17 long years of taking ya in ya little ingrate".
Also, Jack these kids can be stubborn and we too thought this kid will be back in a week tops. It'll be a year on November 3rd. It's all about "I'll show YOU".
Ya know you are right it may be about the mother issues. So, what that gives him the ammunition needed not to call the man who raised him? The father who has been through everything and anything with him?
If this didn't happen to me I'd swear ya did something criminal to the kid. Alas, I know this is the total opposite. You do the right thing and off they go. BUT, just not even calling you. Uggghhhhhghghghhhhhh, live with me for all these years and then just don't even let me know you are safe.
He's wrong and my daughter is wrong. It hurts like hell. I'm starting to think my mom is right. Get your own life and forget about her. I know it's not able to be done, but maybe we can give it a try at least. Just a try.
That so stinks. I'm so sorry, Jack. Ain't it seem like almost a joke or a dream? Unbelievable. GOOD, can't wait till she puts her palm out. I'm really feeling for ya Jack. I am so sorry.
wow--i think i'll be throwing my 5 year old in the clost fro the next twnety years as soon as I see him--i literally am frightened by the prospect of being hurt by my childs immaturities--im so sorry for you and bryn. This si the kind of stuff that makes stayindg clean the hardest--no-one want to feel this kind of pain,frustration,fear,anxiety and rejection from anyone much less our children. hang in there-i did it to my parents and i will live witht the guilt forever, they will come around-try not to give them ammunition, like you say rob-maybe this si a lesson he needs l to learn on his own, I am a strong beleiver that EVERYTHING happens for a reason--and its ok to use us for therapy, talk as much as you need to--your helping us more than you know!!!!
