last saturday i had a friend call me who has a bad choice of occupations. I only went and picked him up because he said he was really sick. when he got to my house he started vomitting and became delusional and halucinating. I know this person was a drug dealer but never so much as smoked so i was confused. He told me after awhile that he had been stopped by the police so in luie of getting areested he swollowed an ounce of crack cocaine.
i freaked .He said he would be alright. Within 3 minutes he started having seizures. I thought the world was standing still it seemed to last soo long! After the seizure i called ems when i felt safe to get phone. While waiting for ems he had another. He could not speak but just looked in my eyes...with fear...facing his own mortality. He was hospitalized for several days. They say that he would have died had i not called so they were able to give him a shot to counteract the drugs. I know i should feel relieved but everytime i close my eyes i see the seizure, i see that damn look in his eyes and i feel i should have done more...and sooner. Not quit sure why i feel this way, but this was the most traumatic thing i have ever experienced. Now i have ot love him enough to just put him in God's hands because he has decide he is going to sell drugs again..My heart could not take it again.He does not remember anything..i do...so does his mother and family. This is so unfair to all of us who care about him. I guess the drive to sell is as strong as the drive to use..Thanks for listening
Tammi
I hope that you can find it in yourself to let this person go on with their decisions and choices, without involving you. If you found this whole senario disturbing, then I'd suggest not being involved in his life. I know that this can be a difficult thing, and in a strange way your friend has given you a gift by showing you just how brutal the world of drugs can get and yet the addiciton is stronger than the drive to stop. That situation was probably enough to help you make smart choices in your life and where you don't want to be.
LET GO AND LET GOD.....
Every addict's bottom is different....some walk away...some don't
I walked away over seventeen years ago.....my beloved youngest brother
chose to stay......his bottom having been his death and my sorrow
I am with someone who walks to and from the needle....sells drugs
gets busted....gets off and goes back to doing the same ol same ol...
Been doing that for over 23 yrs of his 51yr old life......maybe he is living
his bottom everyday of his life.....kinda like a living death....which in the
long run is worse than the actual physical death itself...
Let that horrible scene you witnessed with him be your bottom as far
staying in the relationship......a bottom you can walk away from as the
next time he might not be able to..
Good Luck
