Hey Con,
Definately know you must not be feeling too hot.......understatement, right?
Just wondering too if you've talked to your Grandmom or sent a card or anything.
Thinking of you and especially your dear Grandmom.
Hey Bryn...ya understatement of the universe at the moment...gonna fly next week...looking at Thursday...my bro called again...anytime he calls me at work i know its not good news...so ya....flying...probably gonna feel weak as a kittten and hopefully too busy to feel the cravings ...should be clean though to fly and not have to worry about finding a fix when i get there...like i could anyways...old connections are long gone...feels like im going into the jaws of hell...family...shudder...dont know whats worse...wds or having to deal with the whole clan at once....good god...im not going to be on the board prob. this weekend....im uh...not really feeling to well...smile...if i can up ill read a bit...if not...ill talk to you all soon...love ya all...
(Bryn slaps hands on face like the young Macally Conkin in home alone) AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
Family newly clean.............huge, huge challenge...........BUT, Con this may be the Golden Ticket........ya know like Charlie got in Willy Wonka.
This just may be synchronicity at it's finest..............I am so sorry about your grandmom...............I KNOW once she sees you there she'll get a second wind.
Support, empathy, and plain "We been there, girl" for this weekend...........you know you can do it..............we know you can do it and ya gotta...........so you can fly...............tap on the keys or read like ya said...............through it......just NO counting...........like "It's been 12 hours and 14 minutes"........actually home kicks I hid the clock...............nights as you know are the worse and we are all on diffrent time schedules...............so usually some one is on here.
We're with ya, honey..............Con, I understand if ya don't wanna say, but where ya gotta fly in to.............like what State does Grandmom live in..........you might be jumpy on that plane, BUT ya can't get off...........think of it as a rehab.......................and KNOW THIS:
Billie Holiday AND Anita O'Day flew sick.............they flew through full blown withdrawl and told the crew they had the flu..................pretend ya got the flu, Con................make yourself think it.................much love, respect and prayers for your Gram.
Family newly clean.............huge, huge challenge...........BUT, Con this may be the Golden Ticket........ya know like Charlie got in Willy Wonka.
This just may be synchronicity at it's finest..............I am so sorry about your grandmom...............I KNOW once she sees you there she'll get a second wind.
Support, empathy, and plain "We been there, girl" for this weekend...........you know you can do it..............we know you can do it and ya gotta...........so you can fly...............tap on the keys or read like ya said...............through it......just NO counting...........like "It's been 12 hours and 14 minutes"........actually home kicks I hid the clock...............nights as you know are the worse and we are all on diffrent time schedules...............so usually some one is on here.
We're with ya, honey..............Con, I understand if ya don't wanna say, but where ya gotta fly in to.............like what State does Grandmom live in..........you might be jumpy on that plane, BUT ya can't get off...........think of it as a rehab.......................and KNOW THIS:
Billie Holiday AND Anita O'Day flew sick.............they flew through full blown withdrawl and told the crew they had the flu..................pretend ya got the flu, Con................make yourself think it.................much love, respect and prayers for your Gram.
really ? Billie Holiday...cool...never would have figured...flying sick .....im east coast Bryn...flying into either jfk or boston depending on which is cheaper...im from Berkshire...WAY up there...Massachusettes....wonder if its cold out there right now....
not flying until next week ....easter holiday....better than my gram thinking im there cuz shes dying or something...shes pretty sharp...gonna tell her i had planned on it .....Bryn, my wife was suppose to come too...but today...she just called me up all screamng and crying and saying shes going to leave me if i dont stop with the smack...said she doesnt love me, doesnt trust me and doesnt care...wtf...this week is a toal mess up...can we reverse or jump into another one soon ...jeez...like i need this crap on top of wds...i think its her way of not wanting to go with me...shes never been ...even when my dad died...she refused to come...shes scared...but s***...thats just too fking much right now...
not flying until next week ....easter holiday....better than my gram thinking im there cuz shes dying or something...shes pretty sharp...gonna tell her i had planned on it .....Bryn, my wife was suppose to come too...but today...she just called me up all screamng and crying and saying shes going to leave me if i dont stop with the smack...said she doesnt love me, doesnt trust me and doesnt care...wtf...this week is a toal mess up...can we reverse or jump into another one soon ...jeez...like i need this crap on top of wds...i think its her way of not wanting to go with me...shes never been ...even when my dad died...she refused to come...shes scared...but s***...thats just too fking much right now...
Go, dont let anything or anyone stop you. If this is what you want and need to do for youthen just do it
The wife, well could be a lot of reasons why she picked today to go all mental, but that is her stuff to deal with and what you are seeing is a projection of something inside her. Try not to let it drive you insane or be a good excuse to deviate from the plans you have for you
Clean from smack, she gonna remove the bottle permanently .cause a drug is a drug and high is high last time I lookedI was such a good hypocrite, she playing that role as well?
On a different note, those songs you shared did you write all of themvery nice weaving of the words
Hang in there and be good to you
Love,
Tina
The wife, well could be a lot of reasons why she picked today to go all mental, but that is her stuff to deal with and what you are seeing is a projection of something inside her. Try not to let it drive you insane or be a good excuse to deviate from the plans you have for you
Clean from smack, she gonna remove the bottle permanently .cause a drug is a drug and high is high last time I lookedI was such a good hypocrite, she playing that role as well?
On a different note, those songs you shared did you write all of themvery nice weaving of the words
Hang in there and be good to you
Love,
Tina
Hey Tina....ya...well guess the bottle isnt the "same"...ya know ?...im going thru with my plans...im going to make the flight reservations and im just gonna get on with it...your right...and ya...thanks ...words are mine...not the best of them but i liked the way the band arranged them...and i can hear them in my head...: thanks ...im just writing all day here it seems...its like the endless day..or maybe i should say week from hell...this too will pass i hopw...this too...im hanging in there regardless of what my anger and words say today...know that...and know how much i appreciate you all...thanks Tina
