O.k. i know that we dont talk much and i know im not the best person to give advise about getting clean on Anything.
But this i know.....i had my first son at 15 years old and it was hard. And now he hasnt seen his real father in about 81/2 years. I was in a few relationships were i was not phisicaly abused but the mental part was there.
After he died(he shot himself in the family room one night after we had a fight.) I moved back in with my parents...To make a long story short, my son was almost 4 at the time all this happened, after the funeral, he at the age he was came up to me and said..."mommy i dont have to try and portect you from the words anymore!!!
I will never forget the words that he said to me that day almost 5 years ago. I had no idea what it was doing to him in his little brain when this man and i got into arguments and fights.
My son went to a therapest at that age and all he kept telling the guy was that mommy was better now and that he just coulnt wait to go to bed that night and NOT hear mommy getting yelled at.!!!!
This will in some ways damage your little ones!!! Im no therapist and no Dr. am i , but i know you have to see something happening in your baby's eyes when this happens. And if you dont right now because of the love you feel for "mom" one day you will .!!!!
Please dont take my story the wrong way, i feel for you and i respect you for who you are and what you have said to us today.
I will be thinking of you often and wish you and your baby's alot of luck. Your in my prayers tonight.
Your Friend, Christina
Christina, thank you. It's really hard when a two year old brings you a tissue because you are crying. I'm almost at my wits end. I try to shield them from stuff, but you know how little kids are. The are smarter than we think.
God, isnt that the truth.!!!! I just hope that you took it the way it was ment.
Can i ask you a question???
Do you know in your heart of hearts that this is wrong for the kids to be around??Even if they dont see it happening. They know more than we think they do. And im very sensitive when it comes to kids. Mine have been through hell and back and i want them to have a great life now.
My fiancee does all the stuff you do for yours, you to would get along great!!! And i would never hurt him. Even when i get upset with him, i still have to remember all he has done. And then we talk out the probloms, and half the time we end up laughing about the thing that made us angry to begin with, or we cant remember what we were fighting about in the first place.!!!
I could hook you up with some realy GREAT people, (just kidding) But i know some women that would die for a man like you. Just remember that!!!
Your Friend, Christina
Can i ask you a question???
Do you know in your heart of hearts that this is wrong for the kids to be around??Even if they dont see it happening. They know more than we think they do. And im very sensitive when it comes to kids. Mine have been through hell and back and i want them to have a great life now.
My fiancee does all the stuff you do for yours, you to would get along great!!! And i would never hurt him. Even when i get upset with him, i still have to remember all he has done. And then we talk out the probloms, and half the time we end up laughing about the thing that made us angry to begin with, or we cant remember what we were fighting about in the first place.!!!
I could hook you up with some realy GREAT people, (just kidding) But i know some women that would die for a man like you. Just remember that!!!
Your Friend, Christina
You are right they know and realize more than we think. Christina is right no child should hear or see violence between the 2 people they love most in the world. Hang in there Danny, you know what you need to do. You are a very smart man and have had many obsticles in your life to overcome. You will get through this and look back and say what the heck was I thinking..I really think you and your wife need to communicate and find a way for this abuse to end. I will keep you in my thoughts... Please keep us posted.... We love you Danny!! Rae
Christina, I just have to keep the little one out of this. They obviously would miss Mommy if she left and she would put up a hell of a fight. I believe I am the greater influence on them. I try to shield them from it. Like going into another room or something, but they hear whats going on. I was sleeping one night and my daughter was in the room and she came in and just started to beat the crap out me. She had a couple too many cocktails. I wake up and she's smacking me around. She used to do "shots" and it was worse then, but I'm trying now to convince her to stop. But it's Friday. That means a 12 pack and that means I'm in trouble again.
All the stories about this make me sad when i read them!!! I realy hope that you find the help that you need.
Like i said, i had no idea what my child was thinking until the unthinkable happened.
By the way , just thought that i would tell you that when this man died ...we were having a horrible fight and he was unbealevably drunk.!!!
Maybe its something to think about???
When people have a problom like this and have alot of alcohol in the system, they do things that they regret(you already know that) But there might come a time like my situation when something might happen that you or she might regret and you to cant take it back or make the insident go away!!
Thats kind of what happened to me. If i could just go back and change that one day, i would in a heartbeat. But i cant and i hope you never have to say that!(about this anyway)
Christina
Like i said, i had no idea what my child was thinking until the unthinkable happened.
By the way , just thought that i would tell you that when this man died ...we were having a horrible fight and he was unbealevably drunk.!!!
Maybe its something to think about???
When people have a problom like this and have alot of alcohol in the system, they do things that they regret(you already know that) But there might come a time like my situation when something might happen that you or she might regret and you to cant take it back or make the insident go away!!
Thats kind of what happened to me. If i could just go back and change that one day, i would in a heartbeat. But i cant and i hope you never have to say that!(about this anyway)
Christina
The problem is she has "blackouts" She would ask me the next morning "what happened". Then I would tell her and she would turn it around like I was a bad guy and she didn't even remember it. She would never hurt herself. She likes herself to much..haha..but times get rough sometimes and someone has to step up. I've been doing it for years. 7 months is not that long..
Are you still around danny.??? I was just thinking about you and i thought that i would say hi again. I had to get off the computer because the kids got home from school. They started x-mas vacation today. No more school for 2 whole LONG weeks. They are exited but after x-mas is over im gonna be ready to send them back.
Your Friend Christina
Your Friend Christina
Christina, I'm here. I'd just send em back now and get it over with haha
Ya, but the teachers wouldnt like me very much.!(ha, ha, ha) But then again, i dont think they ever did in the first place.
Are you at home right now?/ I cant remember where it was you said you lived?? I hope that your having a better night rather thatn a crappy morning. But it might be morning where you are and night time was earlier.!!
Just thinking about you. The offer still stands ya know!!!!! (lol)
Are you at home right now?/ I cant remember where it was you said you lived?? I hope that your having a better night rather thatn a crappy morning. But it might be morning where you are and night time was earlier.!!
Just thinking about you. The offer still stands ya know!!!!! (lol)
Christina, it's 4:30 here. I am in Chicago. It's 32 degree out, but when my wife get's home I'm going out riding. Plan on about 10 miles. It's one thing that makes me feel good. Getting down to 5 degrees on Monday with a Neg -18 windchill. Better do all I can at this point. Looks like we are heading into winter big time.
Danny, go to the other post and write back.
Your friend, Christina
Your friend, Christina
