Just some ramblings.....I hope I'm not plagarizing....and if I am, it is not intentional......
I am learning
that there is a Source, Spirit, God and that this Power will deliver miracles if you allow it
that I was running with the devil ( on line pharmacies ), not only have I drained my savings because of them, but, today I got a call from the fraud department of the credit card company I used to buy drugs online telling me that there is suspicious activity on my account. But that is good, the card is closed, --DONE
that Tim is incredibly intuitive, in posting about my first NA meeting,he posted
" Find the similarities, not the differences". How could he know what I was thinking?
that it is hard to find someone who has not gone through this that can understand your pain or shame and that many of these people will judge you unfairly because they have not had to deal with these demons
that it will take longer for my body to heal than I ever imagined, I still ache, my bran at times is really foggy, and some smells still make me nauseous
that my soul/spirit now needs to begin to heal, what was I covering up or hiding from?
that no truer words have ever been written than those by Sarah in saying
" We, as addicts, accustomed to popping a pill to alter how we 'feel'. get so locked into how are bodies/head 'feel'. It is part of the reason why we use, the feeling that we get. It isn't healthy, it is very sel-indulgent ( this to me was huge ), and its a lie ( this drove it all home ) because the truth of the matter that by using opiates, we aren't feeling at all".
that I can finally look at myself in the mirror and see my inner being
that I believe I will come through this stronger and wiser and even though I am not there yet the journey will make it worth it
that there is no easier, softer way, that if nothing changes, nothing changes
that Tim, kee kee, Sarah, Gina, Catherine, Kevin, gentlepeace, THUMPERlove, Shelly, and EVERYONE on this board have allowed me to reclaim my life
and that the past few days, I just can't get enough sleep
Good night! Love, Gracie
Gracie, it is so good to watch you. You really are doing so well. What a miracle huh?
You have come so far....you are doing all the right things...keep that up and don't stop posting. We need you as much as you need us!
You have come so far....you are doing all the right things...keep that up and don't stop posting. We need you as much as you need us!
God Bless you Gracie...............
**HUGS**
**HUGS**
Hello Gracie,
I am so excited for you. It's like being reborn. Everything is new. I remember my "smeller" came back. I wasn't aware that I had lost the ability to smell. Soap smelled so good, I could smell the grass and flowers. The sky was so blue and beautiful. I was seeing in color again. These little things make the hell of OD so worth it!
Catherine
I am so excited for you. It's like being reborn. Everything is new. I remember my "smeller" came back. I wasn't aware that I had lost the ability to smell. Soap smelled so good, I could smell the grass and flowers. The sky was so blue and beautiful. I was seeing in color again. These little things make the hell of OD so worth it!
Catherine
