Not sure if this is allowed. But wanted to share the info. If this is not allowed, I apologize. And Moderators . . . please delete.
There are several FB groups of parents (one of which has over 30k members) who are planning to send the President of the United States a picture (and letter if you want) about your addict to arrive on Valentine's Day. Our children are becoming addicted and overdosing at an alarming rate. In fact, 177 A DAY overdose and die in the States!!! We need action and this is one way to do that. On Saturday Feb. 10, 2018 those who are family members/partners of addicts are encouraged to send to the President a wallet size photo of their child/loved one to be delivered by Valentine's Day. A day of love. A day we all will share in our tattered and weary hearts. Maybe this just might mean something to somebody. Please mail to:
President Donald Trump
The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW
Washington, DC 20500
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE . . . no political comments or discussions in reply. Let me be clear . . . I am NOT posting to invite any type of political discussion!!! Just wanted to share an idea and an opportunity for us to DO SOMETHING . . . to get someone's attention. Can you imagine the impact of tens of thousands of pictures and/or letters on addiction received on the same day???
I'm working on my letter. Here's a draft. What do ya'll think??
Dear Mr. President:
In honor of Valentines Day, I join with other mothers of addicts to bring to your attention the stories of our children and how addiction has affected and infected our lives. I attach the prayer card from my daughter, Jillians funeral. She was addicted to heroin and died due to carfentanyl poisoning. She is forever 21 years, 1 month and 9 days old. She should be 23 in July 2018.
If you had asked any member of my family 23 years ago if Jillian would be an addict, we would have given an unequivocal boisterous No. Addiction, so we thought at the beginning of our journey, was a matter of lack of control, not being able to exercise willpower, not having goals, poor parenting or improper upbringing. Yes, I am sorry to say, we were among those Americans who believed that addiction happened to others because it was preventable. Why? Because we thought we did everything right to prevent OUR child from being near or interested in drugs.
Jillian came from a loving, affectionate hands-on 2-parent household. We live in suburbia. She had a normal childhood. She played with the neighbor kids, went to the park, celebrated her birthday, played sports in school. Jillian spent summers in New England and/or the Hamptons (NY). She was raised in the church. She went to church and Sunday School every Sunday. She sang in the choir, ushered, visited nursing homes at Christmas, participated in Easter pageants, went to bible camps and religious boarding schools. We took family vacations every summer with Jillian, had Sunday dinner with her and her grandparents, spent every holiday with extended family, never missed a school play or sporting event. We told and showed her that she is loved, important, and special. We taught her the importance of values, morals, boundaries, deferred gratification and having goals. Both my husband and I talked to Jillian in great detail about drugs and addiction. Having gone to college in the late 1970s/early 1980s, we were no stranger to drugs. We gave her a simple rule: if the drug has a recipe, it is addicting and just say No.
Despite all of the above, despite our best efforts, despite our guidance, despite being raised in a loving supportive 2-parent home with extended family, Jillian became an addict. She was first addicted to pills and alcohol when she was 14. We quietly whisked her off to rehabs and then therapeutic boarding schools. Afraid of what our family, friends and neighbors would say, we came up with fanciful stories as to where Jillian was and what she was doing. After a 2 year period of remission from this illness, getting a merit scholarship to college, and earning an A- GPA her first semester freshman year of college, we exhaled. We thought Jill was cured, healed, whole. And she was when she went to college in September 2013, at age 18. All we know now is she was introduced to heroin in the Spring of 2014.
She started out dabbling with heroin. But Jillian became addicted within months, before her 19th birthday. Because she was so young, she could never appreciate or apprehend that death was a potential consequence. Jill got something, though. She also was embarrassed and hid the fact that she dropped out of college because heroin had control over her as well as that she moved to Florida to go to rehab. She told people that she was taking a break from college to find herself and relaxing on the beach.
We -- meaning her entire immediate family (mother, father, grandfather, aunt, godfather) -- helped her fight addiction in every way imaginable: from paying for therapeutic boarding school and providing health insurance, to going to Naranon meetings, engaging in all types of family counseling with her, being her personal sobriety coaches, giving her a weekly allowance, paying her unreimbursed medical expenses and buying food. In fact, my husband and I have spent our lifes savings and mortgaged our retirement in an effort to get Jillian the help and care she needed, whether by way of therapy, rehabs, detox programs, outpatient programs, AA/NA meetings, halfway houses or sober living homes. (Actually, we did all of the above.) We tried giving her unconditional love. We tried giving her tough love. In short, we tried everything to cure our only child, or at least control her illness.
I vividly recall telling Jill in July 2016 that it would kill me to bury her. On August 29, 2016, a piece of me was killed. Jill bought 100% carfentanyl, rather than heroin. I got the call at approximately 1.30 pm that day. On August 29, 2016, Jill got her wings. On August 29, 2016, my heart was forever broken and my life forever changed. While she is now at peace, whole and healthy, my husband and I are left here to suffer. At the time she passed, we couldnt even tell people that she died because of her addiction. We couldnt admit that she was an addict. But WE knew that addiction stole our only child, robbed us of ever having grandchildren or a legacy, deprived us of planning her wedding, and cheated us out of attending her college graduation. In short, addiction has left us, Jills mom and dad, emotionally, spiritually and financially battered, bankrupt and broken.
Mr. President, I share my Jillians story and prayer card with you to show you that the face of addiction is not what you and many Americans may think. People have a way of pigeonholing those who suffer from addiction. They call them junkies, trash, and scum. My Jillian was not a junkie. Nor was she trash or scum. Jillian had a smile that would light up a room. She held many leadership positions while she was in college. She was smart, funny and fun-loving. Jillian snorted when she laughed, was a sorority girl and a Christian who we, nevertheless, watched disappear right in front of our eyes. But addiction doesnt care. It doesnt care if you come from a loving home or an abusive one. Addiction doesnt care if you are a Republican or a Democrat. Addiction doesnt care if you hold a PhD or are a 3rd grade dropout. Addiction doesnt care about your ethnicity or sexual orientation. Addiction doesnt care if you are religious. Addiction doesnt care about the whole Is it a choice or a disease argument. Addiction doesnt care. Period.
But I hope you do. I pray that you do. I hope you care about removing the stigma, about investing in research and development of new methods and programs to deal with this illness that is physically killing a whole generation and emotionally assaulting others, and about making sure that my babys, my Jillians life mattered.
I share my Jillians prayer card in the hopes that you see the face of God at this moment. And help! Help the addicts . . . and help us -- their moms, dads, siblings, spouses/partners and loved ones.
Thank you for your attention.
Lynn
Dear Mr. President:
In honor of Valentines Day, I join with other mothers of addicts to bring to your attention the stories of our children and how addiction has affected and infected our lives. I attach the prayer card from my daughter, Jillians funeral. She was addicted to heroin and died due to carfentanyl poisoning. She is forever 21 years, 1 month and 9 days old. She should be 23 in July 2018.
If you had asked any member of my family 23 years ago if Jillian would be an addict, we would have given an unequivocal boisterous No. Addiction, so we thought at the beginning of our journey, was a matter of lack of control, not being able to exercise willpower, not having goals, poor parenting or improper upbringing. Yes, I am sorry to say, we were among those Americans who believed that addiction happened to others because it was preventable. Why? Because we thought we did everything right to prevent OUR child from being near or interested in drugs.
Jillian came from a loving, affectionate hands-on 2-parent household. We live in suburbia. She had a normal childhood. She played with the neighbor kids, went to the park, celebrated her birthday, played sports in school. Jillian spent summers in New England and/or the Hamptons (NY). She was raised in the church. She went to church and Sunday School every Sunday. She sang in the choir, ushered, visited nursing homes at Christmas, participated in Easter pageants, went to bible camps and religious boarding schools. We took family vacations every summer with Jillian, had Sunday dinner with her and her grandparents, spent every holiday with extended family, never missed a school play or sporting event. We told and showed her that she is loved, important, and special. We taught her the importance of values, morals, boundaries, deferred gratification and having goals. Both my husband and I talked to Jillian in great detail about drugs and addiction. Having gone to college in the late 1970s/early 1980s, we were no stranger to drugs. We gave her a simple rule: if the drug has a recipe, it is addicting and just say No.
Despite all of the above, despite our best efforts, despite our guidance, despite being raised in a loving supportive 2-parent home with extended family, Jillian became an addict. She was first addicted to pills and alcohol when she was 14. We quietly whisked her off to rehabs and then therapeutic boarding schools. Afraid of what our family, friends and neighbors would say, we came up with fanciful stories as to where Jillian was and what she was doing. After a 2 year period of remission from this illness, getting a merit scholarship to college, and earning an A- GPA her first semester freshman year of college, we exhaled. We thought Jill was cured, healed, whole. And she was when she went to college in September 2013, at age 18. All we know now is she was introduced to heroin in the Spring of 2014.
She started out dabbling with heroin. But Jillian became addicted within months, before her 19th birthday. Because she was so young, she could never appreciate or apprehend that death was a potential consequence. Jill got something, though. She also was embarrassed and hid the fact that she dropped out of college because heroin had control over her as well as that she moved to Florida to go to rehab. She told people that she was taking a break from college to find herself and relaxing on the beach.
We -- meaning her entire immediate family (mother, father, grandfather, aunt, godfather) -- helped her fight addiction in every way imaginable: from paying for therapeutic boarding school and providing health insurance, to going to Naranon meetings, engaging in all types of family counseling with her, being her personal sobriety coaches, giving her a weekly allowance, paying her unreimbursed medical expenses and buying food. In fact, my husband and I have spent our lifes savings and mortgaged our retirement in an effort to get Jillian the help and care she needed, whether by way of therapy, rehabs, detox programs, outpatient programs, AA/NA meetings, halfway houses or sober living homes. (Actually, we did all of the above.) We tried giving her unconditional love. We tried giving her tough love. In short, we tried everything to cure our only child, or at least control her illness.
I vividly recall telling Jill in July 2016 that it would kill me to bury her. On August 29, 2016, a piece of me was killed. Jill bought 100% carfentanyl, rather than heroin. I got the call at approximately 1.30 pm that day. On August 29, 2016, Jill got her wings. On August 29, 2016, my heart was forever broken and my life forever changed. While she is now at peace, whole and healthy, my husband and I are left here to suffer. At the time she passed, we couldnt even tell people that she died because of her addiction. We couldnt admit that she was an addict. But WE knew that addiction stole our only child, robbed us of ever having grandchildren or a legacy, deprived us of planning her wedding, and cheated us out of attending her college graduation. In short, addiction has left us, Jills mom and dad, emotionally, spiritually and financially battered, bankrupt and broken.
Mr. President, I share my Jillians story and prayer card with you to show you that the face of addiction is not what you and many Americans may think. People have a way of pigeonholing those who suffer from addiction. They call them junkies, trash, and scum. My Jillian was not a junkie. Nor was she trash or scum. Jillian had a smile that would light up a room. She held many leadership positions while she was in college. She was smart, funny and fun-loving. Jillian snorted when she laughed, was a sorority girl and a Christian who we, nevertheless, watched disappear right in front of our eyes. But addiction doesnt care. It doesnt care if you come from a loving home or an abusive one. Addiction doesnt care if you are a Republican or a Democrat. Addiction doesnt care if you hold a PhD or are a 3rd grade dropout. Addiction doesnt care about your ethnicity or sexual orientation. Addiction doesnt care if you are religious. Addiction doesnt care about the whole Is it a choice or a disease argument. Addiction doesnt care. Period.
But I hope you do. I pray that you do. I hope you care about removing the stigma, about investing in research and development of new methods and programs to deal with this illness that is physically killing a whole generation and emotionally assaulting others, and about making sure that my babys, my Jillians life mattered.
I share my Jillians prayer card in the hopes that you see the face of God at this moment. And help! Help the addicts . . . and help us -- their moms, dads, siblings, spouses/partners and loved ones.
Thank you for your attention.
Lynn
I think that is a great idea! It should make an impact, for sure!
Thank You, Lynn. xxoo hugs and smooches
Thanks NY & Parenting. I pray that the president receives so many letters/photos that something is done!!! No more shame. No more blame! No more suffering in silence!! Like the early civil rights workers, we cant get discouraged if our first attempts are dismissed or ignored. Tenacity is what has always brought about change. (You can also think Revolutionary War, AIDs epidemic)
Nough said. Im off of my soap box as an activist. Smile
Saw this for all of us moms..... once again, I don't know the author .... but thought it was fitting. Sending prayers, hugs & love to all!
Lynn
xoxo
*******
Once upon a time I was a regular mom. Stumbling through parenthood like everyone else...and then I had to figure out how to be a mom to an addict.
I had to figure out how to Love my child without helping to hurt him/her, how to grieve the loss of my child whos still alive without dying, and how to trade Shame and blame for strength.
Nough said. Im off of my soap box as an activist. Smile
Saw this for all of us moms..... once again, I don't know the author .... but thought it was fitting. Sending prayers, hugs & love to all!
Lynn
xoxo
*******
Once upon a time I was a regular mom. Stumbling through parenthood like everyone else...and then I had to figure out how to be a mom to an addict.
I had to figure out how to Love my child without helping to hurt him/her, how to grieve the loss of my child whos still alive without dying, and how to trade Shame and blame for strength.
Lynn,
It's been many months that I have been on here. and lady that letter is heart wrenching. It's my son's story also and he was 13. I am going to have to find photos before and today with addiction taking a toll on his body.
I wonder if the president ever took in account the drs bills they rack up going dr shopping and not paying or the crime that is committed due to addiction. Does in take in account the millions of drs of hospital bills the rack up, the first responders that are trying to save them.
Does he understand that it's not a family problem, it's a world problem. In my opinion the pharmaceutical companies should help with recovery, offering free places and support. The 'rehabs or recovery homes are a joke. It's a money making business very few are there to actual help the addicts. Hells Bells if the addicts all recovered what would the 'sober housing landlords do for a living'? I am a very angry mom with these homes. The addicts steal from one another. There are drug pushers waiting outside the meetings to tempt them. Granted some of our babies are strong enough to maybe walk by them, however this is not the case.
Ok I am stepping off the stool...
Sue..
It's been many months that I have been on here. and lady that letter is heart wrenching. It's my son's story also and he was 13. I am going to have to find photos before and today with addiction taking a toll on his body.
I wonder if the president ever took in account the drs bills they rack up going dr shopping and not paying or the crime that is committed due to addiction. Does in take in account the millions of drs of hospital bills the rack up, the first responders that are trying to save them.
Does he understand that it's not a family problem, it's a world problem. In my opinion the pharmaceutical companies should help with recovery, offering free places and support. The 'rehabs or recovery homes are a joke. It's a money making business very few are there to actual help the addicts. Hells Bells if the addicts all recovered what would the 'sober housing landlords do for a living'? I am a very angry mom with these homes. The addicts steal from one another. There are drug pushers waiting outside the meetings to tempt them. Granted some of our babies are strong enough to maybe walk by them, however this is not the case.
Ok I am stepping off the stool...
Sue..
