I am so angry & mad at myself. I HATE MYSELF! WHy am I such a weak & selfish person. I have failed again miserably & I am starting to believe thats all I am. Just one big failure after another. I need some way to get through this. Some way to save my life. I just want to be better. Its like I'm obessed about what if I'd never smoked. WELL I DID SMOKE & now its up to me to quit. Its past time & I don't want to lose another year. My whole life up in smoke. WHat a damn shame!
Sorry for being so negative. Damn!! Hes going to get more right now. AHHH!!!!
have you tried going to meetings?
seriously, quitting weed is difficult, because it is the most acceptable of the illegal drugs...how i quit...i made a decision that cocaine was more important to me....but once i quit the coke, i tried to smoke and it led me back to the cocaine...
you need to change people, places and things...go to meetings, get a sponsor, spend time daily in prayer and meditation...and DAILY give your will and your life over to a higher power, so that you no longer have control....
seriously, quitting weed is difficult, because it is the most acceptable of the illegal drugs...how i quit...i made a decision that cocaine was more important to me....but once i quit the coke, i tried to smoke and it led me back to the cocaine...
you need to change people, places and things...go to meetings, get a sponsor, spend time daily in prayer and meditation...and DAILY give your will and your life over to a higher power, so that you no longer have control....
aea- think of the good things, and start again. we're gonna get thru this!!! xo jo
AEA- Back when I was in marital therapy and the enabler instead of the user, I remember a session where I was complaining about my husbands' pot use. The counsellor told us that sometimes with pot use it isn't something we decide to do in the moment, it's actually thought about days in advance subconsciously. If we can target what was going on a few days ago before the moment you smoked today, you can figure out your trigger. I thought that was kind of interesting. You might be surprised what you'll learn. I hope that made sense, I have a wicked headache this evening.
Hi AEA,
You're post felt very disturbing to me. Please don't hate yourself! I believe each one of us has a part of God living in their heart. That is what makes us all part of the ONE. When you are so negative and hurtful towards yourself, it's not just you whom you are ridiculeing, it's God and everyone. Without this fundimental allbeit simplistic belief, I don't know how I would make it through the day. I hope you will see the beautiful, strong, and eternal presence that lives within you and everything on the planet.
Take care and be kind,
Pearly
You're post felt very disturbing to me. Please don't hate yourself! I believe each one of us has a part of God living in their heart. That is what makes us all part of the ONE. When you are so negative and hurtful towards yourself, it's not just you whom you are ridiculeing, it's God and everyone. Without this fundimental allbeit simplistic belief, I don't know how I would make it through the day. I hope you will see the beautiful, strong, and eternal presence that lives within you and everything on the planet.
Take care and be kind,
Pearly
I'm smoking again too, but only because it keeps being given to us for free! I find myself hating myself and thinking i'm weak but I'm slowly getting over it. I'd hate myself more if i was buying it. The fact that we are here talking about the way we feel and that we know eventually we will and want to quit is such as a positive thing. Just don't lose track of that.
i think the fact that we are unhappy when we use again is normal, the disgust with our actions is healthy. The self hatred is probably why we use in the first place and may need to be the focus of further exploration.
I am not suggesting wallow in the negativity, but learn from it, if you didnt feel $hitty then would you even be wanting to get clean??
So note the feeling, feel it, learn from it, and move on. To whatever direction you need to go in.
I am not suggesting wallow in the negativity, but learn from it, if you didnt feel $hitty then would you even be wanting to get clean??
So note the feeling, feel it, learn from it, and move on. To whatever direction you need to go in.
