I have been reading message boards for years but have never had the courage to post. I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years. He was actively using when we first started dating, by the time I let myself realize the extent of his addiction I was already a year deep. He has been in and out of detox and sober homes. He was able to stay clean for two years. In those two years I fell more in love with him everyday and was so certain that we would have a future together. He was finally able to attain his dream job and gain back everything he lost through his addiction. About a year ago he relapsed and has not been able to get back on his feet since. The recent months have been the worst on him, but its also taken a huge toll on me. Although he will not admit to using, i know in my heart he is.This weekend he stole my debit card and took a large sum of money. This took me back to the vey first time he stole from me 4 years ago and my heart is in pieces. I love this person so much but I know I have to let go. Any support/ words of wisdom or thoughts would be so greatly appreciated.
Hi feelingsad, As you read the past posts on this message board, you will learn that you can't change someone or get them to stop using. Only the addict can try to do that. In the meantime, you have to do what's best for YOU otherwise your life will be dragged into the seemingly neverending spiral of misery. And sometimes it IS never ending. I really feel for you becasbecasuse we all know what's it's like. When the addict is a son or daughter it's even harder, if not almost impossible to walk away. Stay with us here and you will find support. God bless, Barb
I for one admire you for being smart enough to cut thru the haze that being in love with an addict can bring and calling things for what they are and separating.
When the right guy comes along, one who's not an addict, you'll realize just what a smart move it was.
Now comes the hard part...staying separated, especially when the guilt trips start coming and you start feeling sorry for him and want to help.
When that happens...RUN girl RUN!
You deserve better than that!
Rich
When the right guy comes along, one who's not an addict, you'll realize just what a smart move it was.
Now comes the hard part...staying separated, especially when the guilt trips start coming and you start feeling sorry for him and want to help.
When that happens...RUN girl RUN!
You deserve better than that!
Rich
