Finallly Feeling Better

[imaprilnla34]

I am 34 and I have been clean for almost 11 months. I started my drug and aclohol abuse when I was 15. I was put on xanax at the age of 17 and over the years got to where I had to take 30 of the 2 milligrams to just not get sick then I was introduced to opiates. Fisrt loratab then morphine and oxycotine then methadone. The last 3 years have been hell for me I have overdosed over 9 times and almost dies. sent to treatment after treatment. I even tried the rapd detox but stil was very sick for 2 months. I havent been high in a long time becasue the drugs stop working for. My doctor had me on 200 milligrams of methadone a day and 4 xanax bars a day and I would get the rest off the streets. my last overdose was at my parents house on xmas day of last year. I was ashamed. I tried stopping so many times before because I was scared I was going to die. I couldnt help going back because I got so physically ill and could not handle the withdrawels. I finally came to realize I did not get addicted ina day so it was going to take longer to get better. So I locked myself in my room and went cold turkey. Besides the insomnia for the last 8 months and the shakes and throwing up and getting down to 67 pounds. I was determined I did not want to live like this anymore. So I stayed in bed for about 2 months and startted trying to live again. I t was hell but today and the last 2 months. I feel better than any high I have ever gotten. I am free from the bondage of drugs. I thought I would be on it forever. I dont suggest anyone going cold turkey but if thats the only way to stop overdosing and killing yourself. It can be done. I beleive god gave so many chances and if I was to go back there would be no more chances.So for all you people who talk about the withdrawels, it is hell but it can be done and I am living proof of that. So if I can help anyone you can email me at imaprilnla34@aol.com and will help you anyway I can. I thought I was never going to get better but today I free and clean with alot of serenity and I have god to thank for that.So to the adict who still suffers just know there is hope and I am praying for you. I knew I did not want to live my life like this anymore. the highs were gone and so was the fun. I thought I was chained to this thing forever. I was a hard core dope phene and now I am clean and love myself. I wake up every morning still in shock that I made it through all the withdrawels. I still find myself sometimes wondering how I did it cold turkey. So those who think it cannot be done. It can and I thank god everyday that I doont have to live that lifestyle anymore. Sincerely, April