hi i have been coming to this site for ages now. using the loved ones and families of addicts forum.
Do addicts always move from different drug to different drug??
my daughter has been using all manner of different drugs for 6 years now. she's not long given up on heroin,and it seems to have been replaced with amphetamines- yet again.the same old behavior patterns are emerging: lying,blagging money off of me...telling me she's going to go shoplifting if i don't give her money,blah blah.. I am on benefits and i am struggling-money wise myself,how can i explain to her that i cannot finance her lifestyle? the only thing i have come up with is threaten her that if she doesn't leave my property when she visits on the cadge for money is that i am going to call the cops and get her removed from my property.
is this the right way to go about this situation??because i keep saying NO but she just will not leave me alone, constantly guilt tripping me making me feel bad etc etc.i give her the money so she leaves me in peace... wrong thing to do.. i know this.i am so weary and tired of the whole situation with her,feel like giving up...... can't see anything ever being nay different. :(
You have every right to feel so conflicted, it's tough dispensing "tough love" to those we love. However I think you already know what you need to do.....you are right....you HAVE to stop giving her money and allowing her to take advantage of you.............even if it means calling the police. I'll admit I ran in the circle of people whose mindset was "you never involve the police". But in all honesty, looking at it in hindsight.....nothing ever got solved, just more problems after more problems.......Bottom line is if you do nothing, nothing will change, and she will drag you down with her. I know what it is like to live on a fixed income, you can not keep doing what you have been doing, you'll end up homeless and on the streets just like an addict........only you were not the one using Is that fair?
The fact of the matter is by being tough now, though it may feel like you are doing her wrong, you may be saving her life. I personally have never used heroin, but I know of the extreme physical withdrawals. I did use a lot of meth and know it is extremely psychologically addictive. I have heard that more and more meth is being cut with heroin. I can not even imagine the difficulty in quitting an addiction to the both of them. Most addicts will not even begin to consider no longer using untill they have hit rock bottom. Think of your being tough on her as your way of bringing the bottom up to her.. I dont see as you have any other options....who knows? if you look out for yourself first, now. You'll still be in a position to give her help when she is straight, clean,....and in need of a safe place to be in the future. Best wishes.
The fact of the matter is by being tough now, though it may feel like you are doing her wrong, you may be saving her life. I personally have never used heroin, but I know of the extreme physical withdrawals. I did use a lot of meth and know it is extremely psychologically addictive. I have heard that more and more meth is being cut with heroin. I can not even imagine the difficulty in quitting an addiction to the both of them. Most addicts will not even begin to consider no longer using untill they have hit rock bottom. Think of your being tough on her as your way of bringing the bottom up to her.. I dont see as you have any other options....who knows? if you look out for yourself first, now. You'll still be in a position to give her help when she is straight, clean,....and in need of a safe place to be in the future. Best wishes.
Justonemore
You stated that usually addicts will not even remotely consider not using until they reached a bottom..unfortunately there are those that never walk away from their bottoms...
What finally brought you to your knees...describe if you will the last stages of your descent from madness to a desired ascent of wanting to be restored to sanity again...were you able at that point to even remember or recall what it felt like to be sane at one time your life?
i myself even after more than 20 years clean have
a long way to go to being completely restored to sanity
but those days of madness are still quite vivid and i desire
no wish to return to them
Sincerely MARY
You stated that usually addicts will not even remotely consider not using until they reached a bottom..unfortunately there are those that never walk away from their bottoms...
What finally brought you to your knees...describe if you will the last stages of your descent from madness to a desired ascent of wanting to be restored to sanity again...were you able at that point to even remember or recall what it felt like to be sane at one time your life?
i myself even after more than 20 years clean have
a long way to go to being completely restored to sanity
but those days of madness are still quite vivid and i desire
no wish to return to them
Sincerely MARY
