I know it's been forever since my last post. Life in general as of recent has not been all the note worthy. I'm in this rut of same thing different day. I'm still H free 4 years of May 09. Some days i'm so super righteous about my clean time. I stand on this tower looking down at the junkies tossing stones at them. Other days i'm so very weak i'm shaking thinking about dope. It's very strange these mind games have lasted so LONG. I still have dreams about breaking up my brown getting the needle ready I wake up all sick and confused about it all. I'll be depressed for days after a dope dream. After a recent benzo kick "for the 100th time" i've gained a lot of weight. Any time I try to get real clean I get so fat it's frustrating beyond words this constant strugle with myself.
My kids are doing well I was so blessed with good kids. My son is 13 now he is on the track "running" team at school and part of student council . He was a honor student last year the whole year!. When I was 13 I was smoking pot drinking not coming home. My Daughter is 11 now she is not as mellow as her brother. School said her IQ is above average but, she is not interested in class participation. She is the clown wants to stand up and yell always got to rock the boat. In general she is a good kid she has to make herself noticed totally about the drama all the time. The baby he will be 3 in December. He is so sweet. We are looking into a pre school for him to start. They keep me buzy.
I'm still working been at the same job over a year now. I guess my life is what most people would want. Still this void that H left takes a toll. We went on a cruise last month. I swam with bottlenose dolphin. Went snorkling on a reef. It was awsome so much fun. I can't figure out how to post a link to my vacation video so......if anyone wants to take a peek at my large butt in a wetsuit check out my myspace. myspace.com/jengoley77 oh i know many people on here do facebook I never could get into facebook i've had my myspace for about 6 years so i stick to that.
C'mon ZG...do a Facebook. Quiet here lately, but really good to hear from you. Glad to hear mostly good news, especially about the kids.
Keep on keeping on, lady =)
Peace ~ M&M
Keep on keeping on, lady =)
Peace ~ M&M
Hey ZG, good to hear from you, glad all is going well with you and your family. I bet that is some buzz you are getting watching your children blossom, did you ever think you'd see that?
I get using dreams sometimes, and like you they freak me out...... they are SO SO SO real. Scarey eh? But, they are just dreams.....we don't need to act on them.
It's really good to hear all is well, i will have a look at your vids on myspace, i joined it last year, but for some reason i stopped getting into it cause of password. Like M&M said it would be good to see you on FB..... Take care, Kev
I get using dreams sometimes, and like you they freak me out...... they are SO SO SO real. Scarey eh? But, they are just dreams.....we don't need to act on them.
It's really good to hear all is well, i will have a look at your vids on myspace, i joined it last year, but for some reason i stopped getting into it cause of password. Like M&M said it would be good to see you on FB..... Take care, Kev
Thanks Kev and momNMore. I try so very hard to keep my little world in order. Watching my kids grow is wonderful beyond words more special because i had to fight to get them in my home. When I did not have them I was so lost. It's never easy parenting is mostly all uphill.
Those "darn" dreams you would think they would stop!. They are always so real. Every few months i'm still trying to score or banging up in my dreams.
I still have not got a facebook together when i do i will pass along my info. Love to keep in touch with you two thru there.
Those "darn" dreams you would think they would stop!. They are always so real. Every few months i'm still trying to score or banging up in my dreams.
I still have not got a facebook together when i do i will pass along my info. Love to keep in touch with you two thru there.
Yeah...and Davey and GYAC and Ms. Tres and lots of us...we'd love to see you ZG. Just trying to incentivize you =)
by popular demand............I have a facebook... I have my vacation video posted there as well. I am not sure exactly how to find and add people i'm still working out how to use all the features.. TO ADD ME my email is jenmariet77@yahoo.com if you add by e mail name to look up would be Jennifer Thompson i'm sure there would be more then one. So if anyone needs more info just ask. I have no clue how to add my friend matt who is added to my face book helped me get it going.
