This is my first post ever i've never admited the full story to anyone before. I dont drink or do most of the drugs that i used to but ever since about four years ago my father has had a severe back injury and is on very strong pain killers. i had a friend over one night and she encouraged me to take his pills for us and i did and we took them
now ever since i have taken some type of pill every day the pills are locked away where i cant get to them because i've been caught with them before. you would think that the humiliation of it all would make me stop but every time i have a chance i take them.
now i've made it so hard on myslfe I have to take muscle relxers to make myselfe go to sleep at night otherwise i get none!
i quit school i havn't gotten a job yet
i'm depressed and i have no idea what to do and how to handle it
Ok heidi..... I saw your post and no one has responded yet so I am going to see if I can help you some. Lets see where to begin............have some questions...........What are you taking? How much a day? Are you using everyday? This way I know what you are dealing with and so does everyone else who reads. Hang in and don't give up on this board it really is a wealth of information, support and the people are fantastic!
Tina
Tina
i take vicodin when i can get it I take some form of a muscle relaxer somethin like Tizanidinei they are four mg tablets i have to at least take six most of the time i take eight He's perscirbed to take half a pill!
Sometimes to get rid of my pain i'll take like seven extra strength tylenol i dont really know if it helps but in my mind i tell myselfe it does
i feel like i'm on the verge of a break down and i have no one to talk to who i know b/c i would be judged and nobody would understand how horrible i feel
i was taking nursing in college and i quit Bc i know that if i'm gona be around drugs for my career that i would probably take them and get myselfe into some severe troubel with my health and the law
i was scared
Sometimes to get rid of my pain i'll take like seven extra strength tylenol i dont really know if it helps but in my mind i tell myselfe it does
i feel like i'm on the verge of a break down and i have no one to talk to who i know b/c i would be judged and nobody would understand how horrible i feel
i was taking nursing in college and i quit Bc i know that if i'm gona be around drugs for my career that i would probably take them and get myselfe into some severe troubel with my health and the law
i was scared
i dont take vicodin everyday anymore but when i can get to it i would take one or two in the begining and then i had to take three or four to get the same effect
then i took a break from it because i couldn't get it! so another day when i found more i tried to take the same amoun t like three or four and it made me so sick and so emotional i told myselfe i was going to quit but everyday i try to get a hold of it I want it so bad i feel like it makes me feel normal i'm more relaxed until i get mad and when i get mad i explode when 'm on it so my mom questions me about being on something and i let that agrivate me even more and i blow up
i'm going to be nineteen and i feel like my life is falling apart
then i took a break from it because i couldn't get it! so another day when i found more i tried to take the same amoun t like three or four and it made me so sick and so emotional i told myselfe i was going to quit but everyday i try to get a hold of it I want it so bad i feel like it makes me feel normal i'm more relaxed until i get mad and when i get mad i explode when 'm on it so my mom questions me about being on something and i let that agrivate me even more and i blow up
i'm going to be nineteen and i feel like my life is falling apart
i would take probably 10+ of vicodin per day i felt like i couldn't get enough
First off stay away from the tylenol you are going to fry your liver. Still confused about the vic.s if you aren't taking them everyday then just stop now. Look around on this board and check out what people are going through trying to get off of then. The muscle relaxers you are using to sleep are you taking them everynight because I know nothing about what they will do to you if you stop cold turkey.
Sweetheart you are only 19........I have a son your age. Please don't let that scare you away. Is there someone you trust that you can talk to? Can you go to your family doctor and try to get some help? Even NA/AA in your area........ Have you considered fessing up to your parents......look they might be pissed at first but I think you will find in the long run you really need them now.
(Also I want you to know that I am on this board as the wife of a percocet user who while the hubby was detoxing at home 3 weeks ago found out the son was dabbling in some nasty new wave high I never heard of before. Thank god the kid talks to me all the time he told me what was up and what he was taking and I help him stop before he got sucked in to far. )
Will be checking the board stay in contact.
WHERE IS EVERYONE TODAY COULD USE ALITTLE HELP HERE!
Sweetheart you are only 19........I have a son your age. Please don't let that scare you away. Is there someone you trust that you can talk to? Can you go to your family doctor and try to get some help? Even NA/AA in your area........ Have you considered fessing up to your parents......look they might be pissed at first but I think you will find in the long run you really need them now.
(Also I want you to know that I am on this board as the wife of a percocet user who while the hubby was detoxing at home 3 weeks ago found out the son was dabbling in some nasty new wave high I never heard of before. Thank god the kid talks to me all the time he told me what was up and what he was taking and I help him stop before he got sucked in to far. )
Will be checking the board stay in contact.
WHERE IS EVERYONE TODAY COULD USE ALITTLE HELP HERE!
i can't see myselfe confessing to my parents they aren't like you They would flip out completely my mom knows nothing my mom knows that i had my dads pills in my jeans one day but i made upa lie saying i didn't take any she knows that i used to smoke cigeretes but nothing ielse and there is so much
it started with weed of course then my cousin talked my in to taking my dads oxys That was the first pill i ever tried I was 14 Then i was on Vicodin for four years during that i was high every weekend and drinking to then slowly the same person that got me to try everything we did coc, ex, and others snorted pills and and drank while we were on pills I"ve gotten sick so many times and i've had panic attacks when i've been high Now the friend who introduced me to everything is clean sobur she has a baby now sh'e sone year older than me She's my cousin and i still love her dearly Anyways she has a baby she's now engaged to the father they both are so clean it's rediculous They were so heavilyh into things She would do ex all the time which scared me todeal i didnt like how i felt on that i thought i was dieing so i only did it once
My fear now is i have two fifteen yearold twin sisters who are in high school and when i was fifteen i was a sophomore and i was drining smoking , getting high takin gpils and making horrible decisions and i'm so scared for them whichjust adds to the depression When i write it out like that it scares me to death it's more than i though i did and makes it so real to me I'm scared for what myh life will be like later on
it started with weed of course then my cousin talked my in to taking my dads oxys That was the first pill i ever tried I was 14 Then i was on Vicodin for four years during that i was high every weekend and drinking to then slowly the same person that got me to try everything we did coc, ex, and others snorted pills and and drank while we were on pills I"ve gotten sick so many times and i've had panic attacks when i've been high Now the friend who introduced me to everything is clean sobur she has a baby now sh'e sone year older than me She's my cousin and i still love her dearly Anyways she has a baby she's now engaged to the father they both are so clean it's rediculous They were so heavilyh into things She would do ex all the time which scared me todeal i didnt like how i felt on that i thought i was dieing so i only did it once
My fear now is i have two fifteen yearold twin sisters who are in high school and when i was fifteen i was a sophomore and i was drining smoking , getting high takin gpils and making horrible decisions and i'm so scared for them whichjust adds to the depression When i write it out like that it scares me to death it's more than i though i did and makes it so real to me I'm scared for what myh life will be like later on
You are 19 and let me tell you you have your whole life ahead of you. Now you must decice what kind of life you want to have. Trust me on this one I understand exactly what you are going through. I scared the s*** out of myself at your age and haven't went back. I too have other kids your sisters ages......it is time now for you to be an example to then by getting yourself clean. If you are feeling sick it is withdrawl. Maybe today is the day you just starting riding it out. It will not be pretty and you will feel like a truck ran you over. But when all is said and done you will come out a better person. Did you ever think to ask your cousin for help? To find out what she did to clean herself up. I saw that you wrote in another post that you had a friend you could call her too. You need all the support you can get. I still would try to talk to your parents......show theM this board if you have to. Yeah they are going to flip out because that is what most parents do. But they will still love you in the end cause we tend to love our children exclusively no matter what they do.
i've never kno3wn someone to be so suportive thank you so much i'm going to go to her doctar and talk to him but i'm afraid to tell him what i'fe done i mean i've stolen pills from my parents and taken them
Hello,
I wouldn't worry about your twin sisters right now. They are not taking drugs, you are and you gotta clean yourself up.
If you can't talk to your parents about your addiction, then I would go see a counsellor or check out a detox center. If you can't get off the pills on your own, I don't think you have a choice but to tell your parents and then admit yourself to a detox center. That way they can safely get you off the drugs and then educate you on how to stay clean and sober.
From everything I have been reading, I don't think you fully understand how serious of a disease drug addiction can be, and if you don't understand then you don't know how to deal with it properly.
Also it's probably a good idea to get off the muscle relaxants too. Your actualy dealing with TWO drug addictions here. Maybe do one now and when you feel better get off the other drug. It might be dangerous stopping them both cold turkey at the sametime.
Either way you look at it you have a very long, uphill battle infront of you and doing it alone is difficult.
Good Luck.
I wouldn't worry about your twin sisters right now. They are not taking drugs, you are and you gotta clean yourself up.
If you can't talk to your parents about your addiction, then I would go see a counsellor or check out a detox center. If you can't get off the pills on your own, I don't think you have a choice but to tell your parents and then admit yourself to a detox center. That way they can safely get you off the drugs and then educate you on how to stay clean and sober.
From everything I have been reading, I don't think you fully understand how serious of a disease drug addiction can be, and if you don't understand then you don't know how to deal with it properly.
Also it's probably a good idea to get off the muscle relaxants too. Your actualy dealing with TWO drug addictions here. Maybe do one now and when you feel better get off the other drug. It might be dangerous stopping them both cold turkey at the sametime.
Either way you look at it you have a very long, uphill battle infront of you and doing it alone is difficult.
Good Luck.
heidi
first of all you must meet this demon head on i know im am not the one to give
advise
but i read all you wanted to do was get high. well why do you want to get high find the root of that problem and you may be able to uncover some of the situation why you can't quit. then i read that it hurts all time , did you get on the pills because you were in physical pain or did you just like getting high? i am not judging, far be it from me to judge anyone. if i can keep myself in line i won't have anytime to judge anyone else we do care about you and want to see you defeat this demon. listen to mistyeyes she is very wise in her counsil and her husband bad attitude is doing great and knows what you are going through they are wonderful people. in fact this whole board is wonderful and they are some very wise people on here. i think you need to confess to your parents. that will bring accountibility toward them and if i know anything it is accountability is a great thing to have
with all concern
johnny
first of all you must meet this demon head on i know im am not the one to give
advise
but i read all you wanted to do was get high. well why do you want to get high find the root of that problem and you may be able to uncover some of the situation why you can't quit. then i read that it hurts all time , did you get on the pills because you were in physical pain or did you just like getting high? i am not judging, far be it from me to judge anyone. if i can keep myself in line i won't have anytime to judge anyone else we do care about you and want to see you defeat this demon. listen to mistyeyes she is very wise in her counsil and her husband bad attitude is doing great and knows what you are going through they are wonderful people. in fact this whole board is wonderful and they are some very wise people on here. i think you need to confess to your parents. that will bring accountibility toward them and if i know anything it is accountability is a great thing to have
with all concern
johnny
Johnny good to see you on the board.....look for a post from the hubby to you tonight. He didn't get in last night early enough to post......He has something for you to check out.
Stay strong...........
Tina
Stay strong...........
Tina
Thank you all so much for all of your help I spoke with my friend who has dealt with depression and she's gonna take me to her doctar to deal with that and then she's going to help me have the strength to talk tohim about all of the other issues in my life
Will I get into troubel for admiting to steeling drugs from my dad and taking them?
Will I get into troubel for admiting to steeling drugs from my dad and taking them?
At this point it doesn't really matter where you got the drugs just that you get off of them. Remember everything that you tell your doctor has to be held in confidence. Good luck I am so glad you found someone to help you out durning this. Please come back to the board and let us know how you are.
Hiedi,
I'm not really one to give advice at this point, but one thing I think you should do is be honest with the dr. (I understand how hard this is, because I am having a hard time being honest with mine)- only I didnt take them from my father (I'm 44 years old) and have a daughter your age - I bought them illegally off the street when I ran out of my prescription. The dr. cannot give any info to anyone with the new HIPPA laws and I think he will admire your courage and honesty. If you dont want to say that, just say you got them from a friend - you are so young and have your whole life ahead of you. You need to get this behind you and move on with your life ASAP. I wish you all the luck sweetheart. Dont feel so alone about this. Maybe after you talk to your Dr. you can come clean with your parents, but let them know that you know you did wrong and are making efforts to change. Good luck!
I'm not really one to give advice at this point, but one thing I think you should do is be honest with the dr. (I understand how hard this is, because I am having a hard time being honest with mine)- only I didnt take them from my father (I'm 44 years old) and have a daughter your age - I bought them illegally off the street when I ran out of my prescription. The dr. cannot give any info to anyone with the new HIPPA laws and I think he will admire your courage and honesty. If you dont want to say that, just say you got them from a friend - you are so young and have your whole life ahead of you. You need to get this behind you and move on with your life ASAP. I wish you all the luck sweetheart. Dont feel so alone about this. Maybe after you talk to your Dr. you can come clean with your parents, but let them know that you know you did wrong and are making efforts to change. Good luck!
